Into My Heart

XLVIII

Three weeks later

SAM

Everything changed from that night on.

Ashlyn Harris' funeral took place three days after her dramatic passing, as Krieger was out of control and decided to take a leave in order to go back to Orlando and her family. Meanwhile, everything went down to flames: although Stacey Press wanted us to exchange the USB card we had over our lives, Shelina managed to hide the second USB card from her, and therefore saved all of our work without the woman knowing. Furthermore, if Becky Sauerbrunn now wanted us all dead for killing her daughter, we now knew Christen also despised us because Abby killed her father - which destroyed our sisters to say the least. 

So here we are now: Kristie was forced to be working alongside Stacey Press and Press Corporation now that she is one of the Dragon's leader, while Abby and I were graciously asked to stay away from their family. We hadn't heard from Mallory for a while, and Shelina was negotiating with them how her 'story' with Christen would turn out. 

Sighing, I sit down next to Abby, as Kristie is typing a message. The three of us currently are sitting on the terrace of Alex' restaurent, enjoying the last bits of sun for the day, all exhausted. 

"Abs, how was your first week at work?" Kristie asks, barely looking up from her phone.

Our sister shrugs.

"Okay, I think" she ends up saying, nodding her head slowly. As I throw her a questioning look, she adds: "I mean, my colleagues are cool, and they appreciated my behaviour around patients: they think I'm a good intern."

"Dr Abby" Kristie comments, "kinky."

"Shut up."

Obviously, having those two has been the only thing standing between me and sorrow, as well as despair: my sisters were my pillars, and I knew for a fact that Kristie was wretched by Rachel's death, because some part of her was still in love with the Brit even after all these years, while Abby was struggling with the fact that the girl she loves just got out of a coma only to find out she killed her father and not talk to her at all. 

I needed to be strong, even though I had other things in mind... at least, one in particular.

Things with Shelina have been weird lately: ever since we managed to hack into Press Corporation's hot files, we were advised from the FBI not to have too many contacts, especially since Shelina needed to sort out her different with the Press in order to protect her baby. Last night, they issued a public statement that Christen and Shelina were expecting a child together, and that they went to Spain in order to obtain PMA before Christen went into a coma, which basically mean that Shelina still has to work for the Press while secretly helping the FBI and Krieger out.

And I was stressing out, because while we haven't been able to talk much, I have been feeling weird about the fact that, after seeing each other 24/7 for weeks, we just didn't talk anymore, and I kind of missed it ? Or missed her? 

"What about you Sam?" Abby carefully asks, and I suddenly understand that they have been trying to reach me for a few seconds, only to see me too absorbed by my thoughts. Raising her eyebrow, she adds: "Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah, fine" I lie, nodding my head slowly. 

Of course they don't believe me, but they don't insist: it has been a hard couple of weeks for the three of us. 

When Alex Morgan comes with our coffees and starts talking gang stuff with Kristie, I suddenly feel sick and walk away from the table. I can sense Abby following me into the little park behind the coffee shop, as I sit down on the grass, burying my face in my hands. Abby's hands carefully touch my back, comforting me the best that she could, before hugging me softly.

After a few seconds, she whispers:

"I miss Christen, too, and I would give anything for her to talk to me again, or to give me a chance to explain..."

Her confession breaks my heart, but at the same time it makes me kind of angry:

"Why would you say that?" I ask, a bit agressive. 

She knows I am on edge - that is part of Abby's social intelligence, I guess - so she doesn't take it personally. Rather, she just nods and smirks. 

"Sammy, I think I know you enough to realise when you're looking at someone differently than the rest." she declares, her voice being softer than silk. 

I suddenly blush.

"What? No, I-" I start, desperate.

"I've seen the way you look at Shelina" Abby insists, giving me a comforting smile. As I look away, she just continues: "It's okay, really..."

"It's not" I interrupt her, shaking my head, "because she is pregnant, and supposed to publicly date Christen, and-"

But I abruptly stop, seeing the pain in Abby's eyes when I mentioned the Latina : she really missed her in a way that only her could understand. I mean, she lost Christen, maybe forever, and she didn't have the luxury to think about her like I was able to think about Shelina. 

I close my eyes, beaten.

"I am sorry."

"It's fine, really" Abby articulates, trying to hide her pain, before saying: "But maybe you should talk to Shelina, because watching her fake-dating Christen is going to hurt you if she is unclear about how she feels about you."

"I don't even know what I feel" I admit, frowning, "and I don't know if she feels it too..."

"Reason more to talk to her, Sarm, trust me."

I nod my head slowly. 

"What about-" I start, but she won't let me finish:

"We should focus on Kristie right now: her high school sweetheart just died and she is hiding her pain, which is unhealthy."

"You're right" I concede.

As we make our way back to Kristie, who is still talking with Alex and obviously laughing her ass off with her, Sam and I exchange a suspicious look, before joining them.

As soon as the brunette leaves, Kristie proudly says:

"Krieger contacted us: Operation Orange is a go."