Summoned

Hit the books

They say some people tend to sleep a lot when they are dealing with big changes. You know, sleeping it off as they might say, letting the brain sort itself out or something. Or well. Maybe I was just really tired. I mean for one, I don't even remember going to sleep.

(Ughh, why do I feel so sore?)

I groan as I open my eyes, to get greeted by a white ceiling. At least, I fell asleep in an actual room and not under a tree or something. I close my eyes again as I lift my arm up and land it on my face. Or, that was my initial aim, as my hand landed on my mask instead.

(I didn't take off my mask again? Huh, figures.)

I lift my mask and rub my eyes as I get up to a sitting position. And, upon opening my eyes, I see that it was not just the mask that I did 'not' take off.

(I slept with all my clothes on? Even my shoes? Ohh boy, somebody is going to be pissed at me for ruining the bed.)

The open window to my right, was letting more than enough sun inside to light up the room. Along with a cold breeze that kept creeping up on my face, helping me shake off that annoying drowsy feeling. I let out a slight sigh and shook my head as I slid to the bottom of the bed so I could sit normally. I then rest my elbows on my knees and I look straight ahead, at the giant mirror that was on the opposite side. My sight immediately falls on the assault rifle that was still strapped on to me...

(Well, no wonder I'm so sore.)

I look away from the mirror and turn my sight to the rifle. The safety... was still off.

Whatever drowsiness I had quickly disappeared, as I started to remember yesterday's events. I rested my thumb on the safety switch and flicked it back on. Then let out a sigh, thanking the stars that I didn't turn and toss as I slept...

(So I went and did it. I've actually killed Tsunoda and Shido. It's not like they didn't have it coming though. Letting them walk would have ended with more people getting killed because of them. But still, am I supposed to feel nothing about it right now?

Because... that's exactly what I feel, nothing. I don't feel conflicted, or think that I could have handled it in a better way. Nor do I feel any sort of grief or remorse for killing them. I mean, sure I hated them. But, did I really become so numb after just a couple of days into the outbreak? To shoot somebody in the head and just walk it off? To look at a person being eaten alive and not even flinch, even if it was Shido.)

I lift my head and look back at my reflection on the mirror.

(Sadly, I don't think that's a question I can actually answer. Also, I have a bigger problem to deal with right now, that, being 'my' group. Should I come clean and tell them about it? Holding secrets will only cause problems down the road. But, how will they react?...

Takashi in the anime tried to stop Rei from killing Shido one too many times,9 even after they arrived at the estate and he found out why she hated him so much. So he's probably against killing living people. And, whether I like it or not, he has a strong voice in the group.

Rei will probably side with Takashi, and I have no reason to think otherwise. She would probably be fine with the fact that I killed Shido, but I don't know how she would react to the fact that I well, killed someone.

Kohta... Kohta is a wild card in this matter. He was capable of shooting that cop girl he liked, even if that was a mercy kill, which is quite different from what I did. But, he should be able to understand, I hope.

Saya I can't really tell. In the anime it was never really shown how tolerant she would be of such an action. Or if it was indeed shown, I don't remember it.