I can't lose you...(editing)#wattys2015

Chapter 8 Strength and Weakness

Lexa's POV

My mind was racing as Indra and I returned to our camp. Where had Dante been all of these month's? He had been my partner in love and in leadership. He was my strength and my weakness. I needed answers but until he awoke there were none to be had.

I bid Indra to speak to no one and to fetch Andu to my chambers.

Andu wasted no time coming as I know Indra would have told her why. She bowed and sat by the fire pit with me but waited for me to speak as she took a moment to prepare a potion.

"Dante is alive, but he has lost blood, take herbs to Abby and help her to watch him this night as his life is still uncertain. We need to know what has happened and if it will mean a war. Lincoln and Octavia will be with you. Send Lincoln to me the moment there is news."

"Yes, my queen" she replied as she handed me the potion. "Drink this, it will settle your mind and allow you to rest so that you can be strong for what may come." I nodded.

As she left, I let the potion return the warmth to my veins while I thought of my daughter, her father and all we had lost.

My mind drifted to Clarke and the child she was carrying. I had told her that love was weakness and in that moment she believed me enough to send Bellamy to the mountain. I almost believed the lie I had told her until today.

Dante was my partner in love and in leadership. He was my one great strength and weakness. He would give me strength when I felt I had none and I did the sane for him. Strength and Weakness, Love and Hate. Opposites. You can't have one without the other.

I had told Clarke the Northern rebels were not friendly, but I had not told her the whole truth. Their leader, Diana was like a sister to me and she had betrayed me when she murdered my mother and tried to take control of our clan almost 7 seasons ago. When I was newly pregnant with Kaia. She had seen my pregnancy as weakness, and her opportunity to lead.

When we had defeated her, she and her followers fled and had settled in the north.

My reasons for letting her live were simple. I did not want to endanger my child. If Dante was lost to me again due to her treachery, she would not go unpunished this time. But I would need to be cautious as I suspected there was still at least 1 spy left in our midst. His name was Nox. He thought I believed his loyalty when he returned and pledged fealty to me.  I allowed him to think that and remain and I would need to use that to my advantage.

I remained wakeful the whole night my mind racing, making plans and waiting for news.

Bellamy POV

Well, it was official, every one knew about Clarke and the baby.  We had made the announcement at dinner.  A few of the girls had given me some dirty looks, but at least they had stopped throwing themselves at me.  There were many hugs and congratulations.  Only Finn kept his distance, and he better keep it that way if he knows what's good for him. I thought to myself.

We were walking back to my tent hand in hand to gather my things, as we were moving into one of the newly finished cabins tonight.

Now that Clarke was starting her second trimester I wanted her settled and comfortable.  Abby agreed with me on this. I glanced at her as we walked.  She was glowing with impending motherhood.  She was just starting to show and with the waning sun hitting her golden hair, it glowed like a halo.

Clarke felt my eyes on her, "What are you looking at Blake?" She teased.

I chuckled and squeezed her hand. "I can't look at the beautiful girl that I love?"

She smiled, "Well, when you put it like that..."

We walked some more in silence , she finally broke it. "We need to find out the story behind Dante and Lexa"

"Way ahead of you.  Lincoln, Octavia and Kane are going to meet us in a bit at the cabin to fill in the blanks." I replied.

I shook my head with a smile.  This was one of the reasons I loved her.  Her mind was always thinking and planning our next move to help ensure our safety.  We may fight, but in the end we were stronger together.  I would do anything to keep her and our baby safe I vowed silently to myself.  I would not, could not allow any weakness on my part to put her in jeopardy.

Clarke POV

I thought over the events of today. Lexa had been married and had a daughter!

That was a surprise.

Before I told Bellamy how I felt, she had told me love was weakness and so I had forced myself to tell Bellamy to go to Mt Weather with the knowledge he may not come back.  I was trying to be strong, like Lexa.  I admired and respected her.

In the end I wasn't strong enough to let him go without telling him how I felt.

In the end, our love had given Bellamy the strength to go anyway, and me the strength to survive until he came back. I smiled as I remembered his first night back and unconsciously my hand touched my belly.

In the end our love was both our strength and our weakness.