CHAPTER 9 [we need to stop]

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It's the next day after the party at the club and I'm still confused about how everything happened. I was so close to Jack and I hate to admit it but I did want to kiss him. As much as I know it's wrong I wanted to. Nothing happened and the guilt is eating me up, I feel like I've cheated on a friendship. Not physically but emotionally because I wanted to do something that I know I couldn't. I've grown close to Gabbie even if it's only been a few weeks that shes been in my life. Over the past few years I've learnt to value everything friendship I have because if I don't have family then friends are the only thing I do have.

"What you thinking about Grace" Jonah asks which breaks me out of my own thoughts. "Just things" I awkwardly smiles. "Sure" he sarcastically says before coming to join me on my bed. "You okay" he asks, "I'm fine Jonah stop treating me like glass" I laugh, "you were the one who broke down in my arms last night because you were tempted to kiss Jack" he shrugs and my stomach turns. "I guess I just felt guilty" I say knowing it is the only emotion ive felt since getting home last night. No, Jonah didn't stay over but he did drop me home. He came over this morning to see if I was okay. Jonahs always been some sort of rock for me, I know he's the best person to go for advice and he's the one I trust the most after everything - even three years later.

"Don't blame yourself" he says laying on his side to face me, "how can I not, I wanted it Jonah" I say to him also joining him to lay on my side. "You didn't do anything though Grace" he points out which sort of makes me feel better knowing I had the chance to do something and I didn't. That counts for something doesn't it? "I missed your wise words grandpa" I smile, "please don't bring that nickname back" he begs which makes me laugh a little. "So you and Tate" I raise an eyebrows after the laughter goes away. He smiles to himself before answering, "yeah, I like her, we're getting along well" he says and I can tell by the tone of his voice that he was happy. "Be careful with her she's fiesty" i warn him, "you know what that means" he smirks, "do you have to make a sexual remark about my best friend" I cringe. He only shugs which ends up in me hitting him with a pillow.

My phone starts to ring and I answer it without looking what it says, "hey" I say with Jonah still laughing in the background, "Grace?" Tate questions my eyes go wide and bring a finger up to my lips in panic to warn Jonah to be quiet. He looks confused but does as I ask, "hey Tate, whats up" I smile and Jonah expression becomes more understanding, "I'm like 10 minutes away with nothing to do, mind if I come over?" she asks, "er yeah sure why not" I say knowing if I say no then she'll think somethings up, I say yes everytime she asks. "Okay I'll be 10 minutes do you want a starbucks, I want coffee" she asks and I smile, "just a pink drink Tate, I'll see you soon" I say before ending the call.

"You need to leave" I say jumping off my bed and walking out my bedroom, "what why" he asks, "maybe so when Tate shows up she doesnt think its wierd that you're here" I say to him as if he was being stupid, "why not? We're friends, she knows that" he says plopping himself on my couch, "seriously Jonah, she'll think somethings going on" I say with my hand rested on my door handle, "what" he laughs, "seriously" I give him a serious look, "fine I'll leave" he rolls his eyes. "If you need me you know where to find me" Jonah says as I open the door, "don't mention this to Jack" I say to him, "why would I" he winks and I smile at him. "Okay go, Tate will be here soon and I don't want you two to meet in the hall way" I say practically pushing him out the door, "see you soon Grace" he smiles, "bye" I smile before closing the door.

Only 10 minutes later theres a knock at my door and I open it knowing it's Tate, "hey" I smile as she hands me my drink and ventures into my apartment. "You know, I think we should go out with the boys more often" she says almost jumping on my couch. I laugh as I close my door knowing she's using it as an excuse to see Jonah. "You know if you wanted to spend more time with Jonah you could just ask" I say as I take a sip of my drink and joining her on the couch. "He'll say no" she shakes her head, iIraise an eyebrow in confusion. "Are you scared of asking Jonah out" I had to hold back a laugh, Tate is never nervous around guys and she isn't afraid of asking them out if she wants. "No" she drags on the word and I know for definite that she's lying.

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