My heart pounded wildly, and I had to sit down on the bed to relax myself. What has gotten into myself that I acted like a monster? I have never in my entire life raised a hand on a woman! I have only brought pleasure to them, not anger and tears. My whole life I took pride in the fact that I was a lover in bed, and a gentleman out of bed, but Zina's indifference has brought the beast out of me!
She doesn't find me attractive enough, and that hurt my ego and left me hopeless. How can I make her my wife knowing that she does not desire me? Suddenly, a feeling overcame me and I wanted her badly, and who was I kidding when I thought to take more then one wife? In my heart I knew that once I taste her, I will not want any other woman but her! I dropped my face in my hands and wept from frustration.
Mayhap I can start over again with her and be gentil, but she is a wildcat and I don't trust her. If she ever disrespects me again, to save face, I would have to punish her because that is the law in Fay land and in Scotland! A woman can not disrespect a man in public, and get away with it.
Mayhap I can go catch a rabbit, skew it, and cook it over a fire. I can also collect berries and nuts, and present her with a lovely dinner. I could zap steaks if I chose to, but I want her to see me fetching dinner the good old fashion way. Mayhap that will soften her up a bit if she thought I was doing it all for her. I could put on soft music and we could dance the night away. Then I could seduce her and take her to my bed.
I'm sure she has had many lovers before, because she is a very beautiful woman. Then a thought occurred to me. Mayhap she has a lover and wants him, and I am in the way of her happiness. That could explain her attitude. Anger settled in the pit of my stomach. If there is a lover out there somewhere, I'm going to kill him! She is mine and I will not allow anyone else to have her! If she has a lover, I will make her forget his existence. I am a skilled lover in bed and it won't be hard to convince her that I am the better choice.
I marched in the other room angrily, and found her standing by the window, looking out at the beautiful scenery. The ocean waves splashed all the way to the front of our door step. In the back of the house was a Forrest. My father created the scenery with his mind, and presented it to me as a gift and I think this is where I would love to live with Zina once we get married.
"I'm going to fetch us dinner, I won't be long." I told her in a deep voice, but she ignored my existence. I sighed, and opened the door and stepped out, and knew that she was watching me as I walked into the forest looking for our dinner.
Thank you kindly for your support. Xoxoxo xoxoxo
