✓ The Games We Play ⇔ Mileven {2nd - "Wake Up, Mike" Trilogy}

Forty Seven

Mike.

I stared at my feet, but I couldn't see them. I couldn't feel anything, I didn't even know I was walking, or that Max was pushing me along. I couldn't hear much, only muffled voices. I feel like I'm underwater, drowning. Only difference is that I'm not fighting to reach the surface, or struggling for air. I'm taking it, letting the water fill my lungs. And, if I'm lucky, no one will notice my struggle. I can drown in peace, until I find freedom.

"Mike, look at me," I heard loudly, so I slowly looked up and met Max's blue eyes. "Listen to me, ok? She's not dead, not even close. She's actually quite safe, just...scared," she spoke loudly and slowly, and I squinted my eyes at her.

"How do you know?" I whispered, and she frowned at me.

"Mike, I want nothing more than to tell you, I just can't...not yet. Soon, you just need to trust me on this," she basically pleaded, and I just shrugged. I guess I have no choice.

I had nothing else to talk about, so I just walked away, heading in the direction of my house. Lucas caught up, and we walked all the way home in complete silence. My mind should probably be going wild, but it's not. I'm not thinking about her, I'm not thinking about spending the rest of my life without her. I'm not thinking at all, there's nothing.

We got to my house and I opened the door. We went in and sat down, doing and saying nothing. He eventually did speak up, and I only heard him because of my lack of thoughts.

"If it means anything, Mike, we'll always be here for you. Even when everything else goes to shit, the three of us will stick by your side. And Max, since she seems to be quite protective over you...you aren't alone, is what I'm saying," he finished, and I actually felt a bit better. Lucas never opens up like that, which tells you that he's being genuine. I got out a small 'thank you' before there was loud knocks on my door. We both got up to get it, hoping it wasn't an adult that could get us in trouble.

I opened the door and locked eyes with Will, who looked quite panicked. He looked over at Lucas, then back at me.

"I was just making sure you weren't alone," he spoke quietly, very out of breath. I glanced at Lucas, who gave me an unsure look before sighing.

"Will, you can't leave him alone, that's just the rules now," he ordered, and Will gave him wide eyes and nodded slowly. Will and I both looked a bit nervous as Lucas left slowly, walking down the road.

I let Will inside, closing the door quietly behind him.

"Look, Mike, I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm doing anymore, I don't know why I did what I did. I should've been there for you, no matter how hurt I am," he rushed out, and I cut in before he could continue.

"You're hurting yourself, Will. You're causing your own pain. Do you not understand that?" I spoke loudly, startling him. He furrowed his eyebrows, so I continued. "Will, you turned me down. Sure, I didn't say it exactly, but I kinda wanted to kiss you. I have feelings for you, I just don't know how much or what kind. I offered, you turned me down, then proceeded to act like I turned you down. How is that fair?" I didn't intend to be so harsh about it, but he truly is acting unfair.

He didn't say anything, he just looked at me with glazed over eyes. He obviously regrets everything now, and I can see that. It's written in his eyes, and I don't think I'm ready to see where it leads.

I'm not ready for anything. I know things will get crazier, and I'm just not ready.

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edit, 6-21-19: Hi I've always loved that paragraph of Mike's where he tells Will his true feelings. It's one of my favorite paragraphs in the entire story.