December 29, 1997
Today at about 2:15, I was sitting at my computer when the phone rang. It was Matt, calling from a strange number I didn’t recognize. He said, “Hi, Emily?” I said in an obviously disappointed voice, “Hi, Matt.” He said simply, “Zach doesn’t like you anymore, so fuck off.” Then he hung up.
I felt… depressed, but not as much as I would have expected. The phone rang again like, two seconds later, and I answered it again without looking at the number. It sounded like Matt’s voice that said, “Is Emily there?” So I snapped, “Why do you keep calling me?” He said, “What? I didn’t call you. This is Zach.”
I didn’t answer. He continued, “Hi, what’s up?” It had to be Matt, but what was he doing? He asked, “So, are you and Zach still going out?” I said, “No.” He asked, “So, um, when did you guys break up?” I said, “Just now, Matt called.” He said away from the receiver, “Matt, she thinks it’s you!” I hung up on them.
Two seconds later, the phone rang again. I didn’t answer it. Right now, I don’t know how I feel. Zach has definitely played a huge role in my life. Definitely.
It’s so hard to grasp that I’ll never be able to hold him again. Why does he hang around with Matt? How come I still love Zach, even after everything he’s done?
[If only Zach knew the melodrama going on in my head while he prank called me with his best friend… he would probably just continue being an eleven-year-old boy.]
YOU ARE READING
The UnSlut Project
Non-FictionI was the 6th-grade "slut." And I kept a diary. So I decided to create The UnSlut Project in the hopes that my own diary entries could provide some perspective to girls who currently feel trapped and ashamed. I am publishing these entries one at a...
