Second Chances. (WATTY AWARDS 2013)

Chapter 41: Sleepwalking.

Chapter 41: Sleepwalking.

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December

January 2002.

February

March

April

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December

January 2003

February

March

April

May

June

July

August

It’s been two years and four months since I’ve last seen Peasnie. I miss her every Goddamn day. Twenty eight months and counting since the last time I saw her. It feels like there’s a void inside of me that can’t be filled. I missed her seventh and eighth birthday; I can’t believe she’s eight years old already, soon to be nine. There is so much she’s missed and we’ve missed. She missed Kier starting to walk and talk; she missed his first and second birthday. I can’t believe she’s already in the third grade.

Life hasn’t changed all that much for me. Bailey and I are still engaged to get married. She finished school and is currently working as a tour manager at the record label. We made our first music video back in ’01. Life is going good. I wonder what her life is like. If you’re wondering I put everything back. All her things are still here. After I said she was the biggest mistake of my life, Matt beat the shit out of me. I deserved it. Then I realized he was right; by me trying to make it like she never existed I was going to hurt everyone.

Kier always asks why he can’t see his sister. I tell him because she lives with her mom. Kier is just like her apart from the drums, he’d rather be causing trouble in our new house. Yep we bought a new house, guess the address. 3-5-9-0 Dudley Road. Yes, I bought the house I got last time. I liked this house so when I saw it was up for sale I jumped on the chance to buy it. I made sure that Peasnie’s bedroom is always ready for when she comes home. I have a feeling that she will be coming home really soon. She needs too; my expiry date is approaching quickly. Six more years then that might be it for me.

We released the record in August, like two weeks ago and today we’re playing a show. We wanted to get it out as fast as we could; not because of the emptiness the home life has to offer now but for the fans. And by emptiness I mean the fact Bailey went to South Dakota with Kier to visit some of her family so the house is empty.

Jason helped me set up the drums quickly as the show was on in a few minutes. Waking the Fallen record has some good songs on it but sadly a lot has changed about the band. Our friend and bassist Justin had to leave because he wasn’t mentally stable enough to be in the band so we got one of my friend’s little brothers to join, Johnny. He’s a lot better at bass than Matt Wendt or Justin. Not trying to bash on them; just being honest. We pick on Johnny so much. He’s actually met Peasnie before but I don’t think she’d remember him. Kier absolutely loves him; yet again Kier loves everybody who plays with him.

I looked up from behind the kit to see Brian and Zack share a glance while Johnny stood up on the upper stage beside me. Matt made like a good singer and took center stage. Butterflies floated about in my stomach while my heart already began to race. But as soon as we started playing the first track off the album and the crowd went wild; all my nerves disappeared, like I was so comfortable with this life style. But there was a feeling of eyes bearing down on you by someone; in a room full of people one person stands out but you don’t know where they are or who they are. It was innerving. The first track off Waking the Fallen was obviously Waking the Fallen, then there was Unholy Confessions, then Chapter Four, after that was Remenissions.

Finally the last track on the record, track number twelve was called And All Things Will End. Playing twelve songs has left me completely covered in sweat, my drum sticks were becoming more and more difficult to hold onto but I managed. My heart was beating quickly inside my chest as I wiped the sweat from my face and forehead with a towel. Matt said Good-Bye and the stage went dark letting me get up and vacate to the back room. This was Johnny’s first show so he was pretty buzzed about it. He wore the biggest grin I’ve ever seen. Zack and Brian were cheering loudly, saying that this is going to be the best tour ever, because now we have more songs to play and we have a bigger fan base therefore more tickets to sell. I could still hear the crowd cheering away that this band rules. I know Kier’s young but I wish he and Bailey were here. I really do miss them. Matt has Val, Brian has Michelle and Johnny has Lindsey. I just wish I had someone here to cheer me on.

I shook my head at my selfishness and made my way to the back room quietly. As soon as we began to approach the back rooms Jason and M. Berry came skidding up to me with excited and panicked expressions on their faces. They caught all of our attention. What the bloody hell did they do now? I couldn’t help but mentally laugh at the crazy ideas they could possibly do. I gave the pair of them a confused expression, cocking an eye brow and tilting my head to the side slightly.

“We need to show you guys something!” M. Berry exclaimed flailing his arms. Jason nodded frantically with wide eyes. They both were out of breath. Oh Jesus what did they do? What the bloody hell did they do? I knew that what they have to show us probably isn’t as important or exciting as they make it out to be but I was in a sincere mood so I nodded and followed them as they lightly jogged back down the hall way to the main lobby. Jason was coughing to catch his breath while M Berry was like a hyper-active little kid.

“What do you need to show us?” I asked curiously. Jason looked at me and shook his head with a devilish smirk.

“Not them, you.” He replied. I arched an eye brow and pointed at myself.

“Me?”

“Yes, it’s important.” Jason cheered as he led us to the front of the building. Oddly enough nobody actually noticed us which was odd but oh well. I was really curious as to know what they needed to show me that was so damn important. The guys knew it was something for me but they followed along to see my reaction. The August sun beat down on us hard as we went outside. It was the usual hot California summer’s day. The streets were buzzing with activity and noise. I instantly became hotter than what I already was, the sweat still slid down my back heavily. Jason and M. Berry stopped around the corner coming out of the arena and held their arms out towards what they wanted to show me with big grins. I was puzzled but when I rounded the corner to see the little brunette girl standing there in a pair of boy’s board shorts, a tee shirt and sneakers I knew who it was.

“Peasnie?”

A large smile crossed her face as she leaned up against the wall. She looked the exact same but so different, her hair was a dark brown and it was short; like shoulder length short. She also had a cigarette behind her ear which caused me to freak out a bit but maybe it’s not hers. She’s eight; she’s got to know better. Peasnie stood straight and shared a shy wave with me.

“Hi dad.” She greeted with a shy voice.