Falice 2

Boyfriends

Note: Harry Styles has a new song coming out -- "Boyfriends" and when I first heard him perform it I knew all the lyrics screamed Falice. So I had to write this with this specific lyric in mind:

"You love a fool who knows just how to get under your skin."

________

Alice doesn't particularly know what keeps drawing her back to him. Though, she knows very well that she has only ever truly loved this one man. As much as she tried to get herself to hate him; it never worked, she only ever wanted him more. She has always kept a strong front, but when it came to him, she was damn silly putty.

The first time she ever realized she felt this way about him they had been only a couple of reckless teenagers. From shenanigans at school to the dreaded feeling they harbored inside when crossing over the train tracks to get back home.

But it was every time that things seemed to be going their way that she realized more and more that he's not just somebody she could ever forget. He was what made her feel like herself. He was a part of her.

She loved a man who understood her, made her shamelessly giddy; but she had fallen in love with a man who only ever has broken her heart.

The first time he broke her heart she pretended it didn't hurt. What was there to hurt when they didn't have an established label? They had their fun. They fooled around and lived off cheap thrills. Yet, there was a spark in there somewhere; one that neither of them dared to bring up. If it were to happen, it would happen.

This lack of communication fueled the start of the never ending cycle to their same old mistakes.

Beginning with the first time they drifted apart -- from young lovers to strangers stealing glances from across the room.

She was once a fearless Southside Serpent. A dauntless girl who stood her ground whenever she felt it necessary. But deep down she was the insecure woman she identifies as now. She's a woman who has always craved to feel loved.

He was no different then. A boy afraid of every single day he woke up for, finding peace prancing around the school halls disguised as one of them. All he could hope for was for the Bulldogs to earn him a ticket out of the hell he lived under his father.

She attempted to talk to him about how she felt and to initiate a serious conversation about a life changing consequence to their actions, but giving up felt like the only option she had left when he shunned her away for a river vixen. All she could do then was sit in tears in a bathroom stall, holding the positive test. She made a choice and that was putting the baby above her feelings for him.

Now groomed to stand with the northsiders and he forced to officially take his title as Serpent Prince, they lost touch for decades to come.

The second time he broke her heart, he pushed her away again. Watching their children take their places reopened old wounds. Watching as they lived the relationship they never got back in their day made them wish they could turn back time. Their children were fortunate enough to be wiser than they were at their age. They communicated better. They assured each other about where they stood. They did many things FP and Alice could not.

She tried to protect her daughter from the foresaken Jones allure, but like mother like daughter, she was head over heels for a Forsythe Pendleton. There was no use in interfering. All she could do now was be there for her if the second shoe ever dropped. FP, on the other hand, learned from his mistakes, yet it was far too late for him. He saw something special for his son and though he thought he could never make it up to Alice, he knew he could guide his son to be the perfect gentleman for her daughter.

And if it weren't for their children growing closer, they wouldn't have been forced by the universe to cross paths indefinitely again. Living away from the past was no longer an option. They had to face it again, whether they liked it or not.

"Well then leave him," He spat out without as much as a second thought. He was offended when she viewed everything they had as mistakes. They weren't all mistakes, he firmly believed.

She had seen the look in his eyes when he realized what he told her. She missed a heartbeat, too. He attempted to cover himself up "...at home."

They both knew he knew what he actually meant to say then and there tough. They knew.

They got through that fight eventually. Going as far as rekindling the fooling around they were vastly familiar with. But as soon as things started to feel good again, something always came their way.

He was classic FP Jones once again.

"You know what's funny? I was afraid our kids are gonna make the same mistakes we did." She was not going to let him humiliate her like this again. "Turns out we're the ones making them all over again."

He breaks her heart for a second time by pushing her away without a solid explanation yet again.

The third time he broke her heart, she couldn't get him to admit that he loved her. She wanted to hear it for herself before she stopped telling herself to believe that he did.

They had grown stronger, or so she thought. They grieved over their son together, they have dealt with the town's bullshit together, and they have protected each other from any possible danger coming their way. But their damn lack of communication always got in their way.

"Do you love her FP?" She was afraid to ask this in the way she really wanted to.

"She's the mother of my children," He didn't know how to answer properly. For his children, he couldn't answer truthfully.

Admitting it, itself, was just as scary. Stating the truth meant he was due to stupidly ruin it soon. Having something serious was foreign to him. He didn't want to mess this up by not knowing how to love her the way she loved him. A kind of love he knew she deserved, but was terrible at expressing.

His choice of words wounded her more than she thought they would. Would he always view her as the other woman? Would he ever put her first?

"And me? Do you love me?" She dared to ask. She was afraid of either answer. No? She would feel hurt. Yes? She would be afraid of it one day not being true.

"It doesn't matter now. It's over."

Giving up so easily tore her apart once again.

The fourth and last time he broke her heart, he left for Toledo, leaving her behind and all alone. She loved him for what he had to do for his daughter, she did, but she couldn't say she didn't want him to stay.

She spent the last seven years thinking about what they lost in time. They were happy. They were so close to having it all. Almost able to prove to their younger selves that they could do it.

But would she do it again? Could she go through the possibility of more heartbreaks? The thing is...she knows she definitely would. She foolishly would open herself up again.

Now, she stands on the other end of the red door listening to him knock from the outside.

She opens the door. And there she is ready to be at it again like a damn fool in love.