Infatuated with a God

Chapter Twenty-Three

Good things couldn't last forever. What goes up must always go down, and I began falling. Over the past five months I began to have less nightmares, and the nightmares had begun to affected me less. Only Thor knew about them, when he took up residence in the tower it was a bit hard to keep them from him. When you wake up screaming and a warrior lives across the hall he was bound to burst into my room with weapons ready. I hadn't woke up like that in three months and it was refreshing. My mental health had felt like it was stabilising, and I hadn't picked up the dagger under my pillow for a while. Maybe I was just experiencing a mania, maybe it was never going to be better like I had hoped. It started with a nightmare. Up until now my nightmares were always similar to each other, in that they were my own memories. I'd relived my assassinations, my torture and all the trauma I'd experienced. It's what kept bringing my memories back. I became numb to the realisations which prevented me from waking up screaming like usual. Instead, I just tried to process them, realising it had happened and then move on. It wasn't easy and I often found myself in front of a punching bag in the training room ridiculously early on those days. This wasn't a memory. I stood in the middle of a battlefield covered in blood that wasn't my own. My energy glowed around me with a violent fury. In front of me was Thor, he was beaten and bloody and when he opened his mouth more blood spilled out.

"Why?" His voice was a gravely whisper. He stumbled backwards before collapsing to the floor. As he did, the dagger I was wielding appeared from his chest, caked in his blood. Internally I was panicking, I tried to make myself to rush over to him. I wanted to help. Instead, I laughed. I realised I was trapped in myself, unable to control what I did but forced to watch it. Thor bled out on the ground below, bleeding out from the stab wound over his heart. I felt like I needed to scream out, to sob in order to relieve some of the grief that consumed me. But I couldn't. I just stood there watching as the light faded from his eyes. Then I felt a bolt of energy building within me, and I flung it out behind me before turning. Loki hovered in the air, my power wrapping itself around his neck. I heard the sound of metal clinging and went to pick up the dagger from the floor.

"Ooh a trophy to celebrate the death of the avengers. I have to say it is surprisingly easy to kill a God." My voice sounded cold and foreign, possessed by a rage and bitterness I didn't feel.

"Kaya... please." Loki struggled to breath against my power. It was slowly choking him out. I felt the smile on my face, the laughter fill the air, and then the twist of my hand. A loud crack was heard and then Loki fell to the floor completely lifeless.

Darkness surrounded me as screams left my lips. The scream filled the room, but I was unable to stop it as panic filled my chest. I thrashed underneath the sheets, trying to get them off of me, anything to stop feeling as suffocated as I did. I eventually managed to as I scurried off of my bed and on to the floor in pain. The door to my room burst open and I vaguely noticed Loki standing there in his Asgardian armour and donning two identical daggers. He froze in the doorway just as Thor ran in behind him. Usually, Thor would immediately come and comfort me, but as I kept replaying the scenes in my head again and again I noticed a golden light filling the room. The power was overwhelmingly thick in the room as my screams continued. Through my tear-filled eyes I saw Thor go to walk towards me, but Loki stop him from doing so. Loki held his hands up and a small green shimmer fell over him as he shielded himself with the power he had access to. He tried to walk towards me, but I yelled at him to stop, for them both to leave. His shield was too weak due to the bracelet and Thor was exposed.

"Kaya you have to remember what I taught you. Hone the energy back in. You can do it." My screams were replaced with vicious sobs. I had no energy to divert my magic as my chest began to tighten. Unable to breathe I started to hyperventilate, sobbing that they needed to leave that I would hurt them. As the power in the air built I heard Loki shout at Thor to at least take cover.