"WELL THAT WAS THE TIME OF MY LIFE."
"Aw, c'mon, Charles Darwin don't be such a Scrouge."
"CHARLES DARWIN DISCOVERED EVOLUTION-"
"And you need to evolve out of your shouting phase. Keep it up and I'll need a prescription for paracetamol."
"You don't need a pres-"
"Ah ah ah- shh. Exactly."
"Don't fucking shh me, we got kicked out because of you and your hyper Irish jig on the table."
"So?"
"So, that's the second time I got kicked out of a public place in the space of three weeks."
"Charlie, if you're expecting me to ask what the reasoning behind the first kick-out was, you're sorely mistaken. I don't care."
"I was going to tell you anyway, Mr. Cold-Hearted. And slow down, why are we jogging on the sidewalk?"
"Stop that."
"What?"
"Fucking whining. You're gay. You're supposed to be fun."
"Sorry for not fitting the stereotype."
"You going to tell me the first kick-out story or not, Loser?"
"I thought you didn't-"
"Tell me the damn story before I rag your testicles off and use them as earmuffs."
"Fine. I got kicked out of church, because I was caught kissing the priest's son. It's not my fault."
"No way. You did not. You are savage."
"He came onto me! He always wanted to experiment, it's in his bi-curious face! So I kissed him."
"The priest's son though."
"He wanted it!"
"No need to shriek you pre-pubescent skunk."
"Fuck off."
"Oh my god..."
"DON'T JUST STOP IN THE STREET-"
"Lesbians."
"What?"
"Right there. Holding hands on the park bench. See them?"
"Oh boy..."
"Don't you think lesbians are hot?"
"..."
"Oh."
"Yeah, because asking a gay guy if they think gay girls are sexually attractive makes a load of logical sense, Ferne, you absolute dick-munching basket-case."
"Sorry, I got excited."
"What. The. Fuck. You're a goth. You're supposed to be stone-cold. Dick down, my friend."
"Pah!"
"Straight boys. Never understand them."
"Don't just walk away, get back here so I can beat you the fuck up, freak!"
"DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME SHOWING OFF TO THE LESBIANS, FERNE TREE."
"Hey! They looked up! Damn dude you fucking blew it."
"Yep I sure did, and your dad enjoyed it immensely."
STAI LEGGENDO
Ass Milk
Storie brevi"So, how did you know you were gay?" "One day, I was walking and a rainbow tumbled from the sky and onto my head. Consequently, my brains fell out and I forgot what a vagina was. So, suddenly, when I accidentally walked into a changing room and tho...
