[charlie, preoccupied by the rage aimed at his phone, doesn't realise he's walking straight into a, er, rather intimidating classmate. poor boy.]
"Oi! Shit-head! Look up from your phone and watch where the hell you're going! I'm not in the mood to cuddle weirdos on the sidewalk."
"What the fuck?! Hey! Shit, dude! You scared me! Don't stand in my way like that!"
"Sweetie, YOU WERE THE ONE WALKING INTO ME. What the hell were you doing, Blonde-Boy? Sexting yourself? You're scary."
"Ex-squeeze me? I'm scaring you? If anyone's doing the psychological scarring here, it's you. Pitch black hair, creepy black clothes and is that eyeliner? Are you auditioning for a Halloween special?"
"Alternatively, you could have saved your dog's breath and just called me a goth."
"Or, better yet, ugly."
"Careful, you could trigger me."
"Your eyeliner is triggering me."
"You're really funny. I'm suffocating on suppressed laughter, Blondie."
"Do goths even laugh?"
"They do when they begin strangling annoying classmates in the middle of a public area."
"Classmates?"
"You're actually kidding me aren't you, Charlie?"
"No...?"
"I'm in your art class. I sit at the back?"
"Nope. If there was a goth in my art class, I would know."
"My god. Does Ferne Olson ring any bells?"
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"Why do you look so different?"
"Maybe because right now, I'm wearing my full goth look?"
"By that you mean the layers of white face paint, do you?"
"I don't even own face paint, this is my natural skin tone, you dick-biscuit."
"No need to go on the defensive. I'm just saying that the Ferne I see at school doesn't look like a ghost. He actually looks like a relatively plausible human boy, if not a bit freaky."
"Look, I'd love to stand here and compliment you all day beautiful, but I really have to go. Just be aware of who you're walking into in future, alright?"
"Where are you going? Do you have some satanic occult ritual?"
"It's funny until you realise you're going to be the next sacrifice."
"F off, Ferne."
"Get home safely, Charlie. I wouldn't want you beaten up by those stupid bullies."
"..."
"Again."
"Bastard."
"I HEARD THAT!"
YOU ARE READING
Ass Milk
Short Story"So, how did you know you were gay?" "One day, I was walking and a rainbow tumbled from the sky and onto my head. Consequently, my brains fell out and I forgot what a vagina was. So, suddenly, when I accidentally walked into a changing room and tho...
