I didn't actually put him in my backyard. That would be too nice of a punishment for him and I was sure he would enjoy it way too much.
Instead, I put him on the second level where my room was and gave him the room across from my own.
'I swear to God, if he makes one single remark about being so close to my room-'
John interrupted my thoughts and do you know how? Can you guess? I'm pretty sure you can.
It's John we're talking about. Come on.
"If you wanted me close, all you had to do was put me in your room." He began cheekily as he put his bag on his bed.
I froze in my spot by the doorframe, stunned, and looked at him incredulously.
'For fucks sake-'
Before he could continue, I strode up to him determinedly and pinned him to the wall, my right forearm over his neck and my left hanging by my side, ready to spring into action if it needed to.
His eyes widened as he looked down at me with a surprised expression. I, on the other hand, glared up at him.
"Finish that and you'll be walking funny for a month straight." I hissed, annoyed by his perverted teenage brain. Instead of getting angry and defensive, John simply threw his head back and laughed.
"Oh? And how are you going to do that, darlin'?" He asked humorously and I felt a sly smirk take over my face as I raised my knee to his...erm, manhood, but didn't physically touch it. His eyes widened at the unexpected move.
"I could always bruise your baby-maker and scar you for life." I suggested innocently and looked him square in the eye.
Despite my hopes, John smirked, as if amused by my very real threat. "Or," He started, his tone just as 'innocent' as mine was, "we could still use that part of my anatomy and instead, I'll have you walking funny for a month." My jaw dropped as my mouth dried.
'I- I walked right into that one, didn't I?'
I let out a hiss of annoyance. "Why can't you just be a normal person for once and just react like a normal person would?" I asked frustratedly as I retracted my arm from his throat that I oh-so wanted to strangle.
'Is my heart supposed to be beating this fast?'
John laughed at my remark.
"Sorry that I'm not as predictable as you want me to be, darlin'." He replied with a nonchalant shrug.
'I want to slug him.'
I was one second away from hitting him in the nose and shutting him up for, at the very least, a single moment.
"You are infuriating." I muttered as I walked around to leave the room.
Before I could, however, I sensed an arm reach out to grab my wrist. Before he could, I had already grabbed it, spun him around, and flattened him out on the ground. John lost his breath as I put pressure on his chest by using my elbow.
"Didn't anyone ever tell you it's impolite to touch a woman without her permission?" I inquired with an arched brow as I put my other arm's forearm on his throat to make him squirm. John's eyes widened in surprise before they returned back to normal and he smiled lazily up at me.
"Didn't anyone tell you that pinning someone on the ground is hot?" He retorted and my cheeks flamed as I attempted to play it off by rolling my eyes.
'Calm the fuck down, heart. You're fine. He's just doing this to mess with you. Don't let him get the better of you.'
"Didn't anyone ever tell you that your flirting sucks?" I replied snarkily and John smirked up at me.
"No. In fact, I've heard the opposite." He murmured, his voice managing to be smooth like fucking butter.
'Cue BTS.'
I rolled my eyes at his remark, hoping and praying he couldn't hear my heart racing. "You're incorrigible."
He winked at me, obviously enjoying my pain. "Only for you, darlin'." He said with a shit-eating grin and I cocked my head to the side at the name.
"Why do you call me that?" I wondered aloud, curious.
I've never really received nicknames from anyone outside my family and Ray. And Dean. Unless, of course, you count 'bitch' as a nickname.
Yes, Elle is a very creative person. I know.
John shrugged at my question and answered, "My grandma always called us that."
'Past tense. Interesting.'
"So you're calling me by the name your nan called you?" I asked, my eyebrow still raised. John's eyes widened when he realized I was right and then he laughed heartily.
"Yeah, I guess so." He replied with a happy smile on his face. My heart softened at the content look on his face.
'I just hope I can keep him safe from all my bullshit.'
It was only then I figured out what...compromising position we were both in; I was straddling his waist so our bodies had very little room for Jesus and my arm was still on his throat.
And the way he was looking at me...
My mouth opened slightly to say something, but nothing came out.
I then let out a small sigh. "John..." I trailed off with a shake of my head. "The way you look at me...I-I don't deserve it." I mumbled, my heart cracking under all the emotions.
'Six guys. I've fought six guys ALL AT ONCE. And this twat under me manages to bring me to my knees? How the fuck does that make any sense?'
"How am I looking at you?" John asked, his voice soft and gentle. His face was relaxed and his intense gaze made me want to crumble.
I swallowed thickly and my eyes fluttered subconsciously.
"Like...you think I'm a good person." My voice turned into a broken whisper and I felt that familiar shame rising up in my chest.
'Fucking hell, you idiot! ShUt uP!'
John gave me a confused look and carefully sat straight up which caused me to sit in his lap. His arms fell to my hips and my hands went to my own lap to fiddle with my fingernails.
"What on earth are you talking about?" He asked incredulously. I hung my head, ashamed. "You are a good person." He insisted and I raised my head up to look him in the eye.
"But I'm not." I replied swiftly with a shake of my head. John's brow crinkled in confusion and I wanted nothing more than for the world to swallow me whole and end my misery.
"John, I suggest you believe me when I say I'm not a good person." I began before he could object. I then scoffed humorlessly. "Hell, I'm the reason why my mum is dead and my own family hates me because they know it. I knowingly hurt people by fighting because I'm a coward that can't keep her family safe and I've put numerous people in the hospital because of it." I rambled, my mouth moving on its own accord. In my head, I was cursing myself to hell and back.
'You. God. Damn. Twat. SHUT UP.'
"And I've put you and your cousins in harm's way by tricking myself into thinking that I can have a normal life." I continued.
Then, my voice quieted to a whisper as I finished, "And I'm selfish in that I can't let you go."
'YoU iDioT. Now, HE KNOWS WE'RE A SHITTY PERSON AND HE'S GOING TO LEAVE US.' My brain shouted in my mind.
I felt my heart sink when he didn't say anything.
After a moment of tense silence and me staring at my lap, I felt a hand reach under my chin.
"Look at me, darlin'." John's soft voice spoke up. I shook my head vigorously as I refused to look up.
'Yeah, no. Not going to happen. Move on, mate. That's not going to work.'
"Grace..." John cajoled and I adamantly shook my head.
'Not. Happening. Piss. Off.'
John tilted my chin up, despite all my protests, and angled my head to where he could look at my face.
I, however, avoided his gaze altogether by looking at his hair.
'So soft looking.'
It was a good way to ignore my emoshons.
Yes. Emoshons.
Nasty little arseholes.
"Now, look into my eyes." John continued, his voice gentle and had an amused hint to it. I made a noise that essentially said no.
John sighed deeply and suddenly, he gently directed my face to where I was forced to look him in the eyes.
"There are those grey eyes that I love." He murmured, his chocolate brown orbs gazing intensely into my own. My eyes fluttered and I looked away from him to the window that leads to a balcony overlooking the backyard.
'I can't look at him. Not with that...look...in his eyes.'
He sighed once more and then abruptly spun me around in his lap so that my back was against his front. I let out a squeak at the sudden change.
"What...?" I trailed off, but that stopped when I felt him place a small kiss on the crook in my neck where my hoodie didn't cover.
'Wh-what is he doing?'