Hazel's Hitchhiker

27: Raul and Theresa's

The last thing I wanted to do was meet Craig. Part of me was hoping that dinner would be finished by the time he got there. Although, maybe it would be a blessing to actually know if this Craig guy was somewhat better than my old man. If he wasn't an alcoholic, that would be some kind of start. But I'll admit, going to a sit-down restaurant sounded nice after being in the car for so long. And upon arrival, my eyes were amazed at how Mexican this restaurant looked. Walking into the restaurant, it was interesting to see how painted brown the place was. It was a good size crowd for a weeknight. While Hazel used the bathroom, my mom and I were quickly seated at a table.

"You know, the first time I came here," began my mom. "It was my first date with Craig. He couldn't shut the hell up about this place and how he always came here for lunch. Little did I realize how right he was. Every time I come here, I always order the Spanish Steak."

There was no response from me. How was I supposed to respond to that? In response, I decided to just sit and glare at the menu. About a moment later, Hazel returned from the bathroom and began looking at her menu with those sunglasses in that mouth of hers. My mother couldn't help lift a smile when she saw the small quirk.

"I used to chew on my pencils all the time back in high school," she commented with Hazel's eyes off the menu. "It's kind of cute that you do that." She began to lightly chuckle.

Another minute later, the waitress arrived asking if we were ready to order drinks. Both my mom and Hazel both ordered tea. My mom's eyes widened when I announced what I wanted to order.

"I'll have a Corona please."

"Certainly, and can I see some ID?"

And without any hesitation, the fake ID was pulled out of my wallet. The waitress looked at it for a good minute before saying anything.

"McKiss huh? Interesting name. I'll have your drinks out in a moment."

When the waitress left, my mom just sat there and gave me a look while Hazel sat there not a bit shocked at what just happened.

"Let me see that ID of yours?" she commanded. The woman took it in her grip and gave it a good look while scratching her lips. "Honey, why the hell do you have a fake ID? And out of all names, you went with one that is incredibly stupid sounding. Like really. McKiss? Who in their damn right mind names their kid McKiss?"

Shit, it quickly dawned on me that maybe ordering an alcoholic beverage wasn't wise to do in front of my own mom. And now she would want to talk about it with me. Couldn't she just get off my case and let me enjoy my beer?

"Remember that movie Superbad that Uncle Ted couldn't shut up about after it came out?" She nodded with a yes. "Well, one of the characters in the movie had a fake ID and called himself McLovin. A friend of mine thought it would be funny if I did something like that. And so I did. I got a Fake ID with a silly name."

My mom just stared at me for a few seconds as if I were an idiot. Hazel just sat there while scratching her head and bit her lips.

"Clearly I made the mistake of letting your father raise you."

In a flash of an eye, the server arrived with our drinks which didn't allow me to respond to what my mom said. Probably for the best because I would've probably said something regretful. And while everyone at the table thanked the server for the drinks except for me, my lips were pressed together not wanting to say anything. How could this woman get away claiming that she made a mistake? Not only did she make the mistake of letting my old man raise me, but she made the mistake of leaving. Hell, she made the mistake of not taking me with her.

With the server gone, my Corona was instantly opened and there was little hesitation in taking a big gulp of the drink and roughly slamming it on the table to sit. Another sip would soon be taken. Ignoring what just happened, Hazel tried to lighten the mood and brought up a few lighthearted topics. It was mostly them doing the talking.

After about five minutes, the waitress took our order. Both Hazel and my mom ordered the Spanish Steak, while I simply ordered nachos. Once our order was taken, we continued talking. I just sat there not really saying much until something political was brought up. According to my old lady, a friend of hers recently had an abortion and my own damn mother helped pay for the abortion. How the hell did a subject like abortion get brought up?

"Why the hell would you help murder a child? Just let her have the damn baby. Don't we all deserve a chance at life?"

"Yes dear, but if she doesn't want to have a damn baby, she doesn't have to have it."

This led to the topic of money and taxes which got a little heated. My mom apparently liked the idea of universal healthcare, but I was against it. Hazel was also somewhat opposed to it and said little letting me do the talking. Before that night, I never realized how much I feared Socialism. My mom wasn't big on Socialism either, but that didn't stop me from discussing how important Capitalism was and how taxes needed to be reduced in order for the economy to thrive. There seemed to be a lot of passion in what I was saying. When was the last time I had that much passion for something?

The heated political rant soon ended once a bald and stocky man known as Craig showed up. He apologized for being late and gave his girl a kiss. Hazel and I shook his hand and he told us a couple of jokes. The two of them seem to be madly in love.

"So Joey," Craig started. "Your mom tells me you're about to start college in Austin. You must be excited."

"As long as there's free beer, I should be good," I claimed not knowing if I was being serious or not.

The table erupted in laughter. If Craig hadn't shown up, my mom wouldn't have laughed. Why the hell did she like this guy so much?

"You know," my mom began continuing to laugh a little. "You remind me so much of your father." A pause was taken while she took a deep breath. "You're so much like your father."

Without realizing it, my fist slammed on the table which knocked the Corona to the floor. An unexpected pain entered my head giving me a throbbing headache.

"I am nothing like my damn father! Nothing!"

"Honey calm down," my mother stated not wanting to cause a scene.

Listening to those words was impossible. Calming down was impossible. At that moment, the urge to scream and yell was real. Who the hell did this lady think she was? Without any thought, my body stood up not able to sit.

"Like hell, I'm going to calm down. You let me live with that damn bastard for four damn years! Four years! And during that time do you know what he did? He would sometimes beat the shit out of me! He littered the damn house with beer cans and hired a maid to clean up the mess! The man was a damn lazy bastard who was a piece of shit for a human! And you really think I'm like that piece of shit? You really think so?" For a moment, there was an effort to calm down, but it was unsuccessful. "I am nothing like my shit old man! Nothing! So fuck you mom! What the hell do you even know?"

And just like that, I stormed out of the restaurant and got an Uber to take me home.

Poor Joey. That was quite a chapter. Don't forget to comment and vote!

Have you ever gotten angry at someone?

Does Joey have every right to be angry at his mom?