My Beast

[24]

"So you can't either." I was taken back at her word choice letting that sink in.

"Nazira? When you were down in those cells with that woman you already had a plan in motion. You wanted to take her life, I know you because I felt the same power when Beast holds me in his grasp."

Ok what the hell is this! Some freaky subconscious take over, she was talking like she liked it. Being held and forced to endure things she acted like she wanted to remember all those events.

"Ok? Beauty, what do you see that I don't?" She stared back at me unfazed.

"Strength is what we gain
For the madness we
Survive."

"What?!" I was confused and honestly had enough of this shit, she was being gauged like a robot under control spoke when told and breathe when released, that wasn't me!

"I don't have that much time he'll be back soon but, you do. Nazira if you want to survive you have to give in. Let all of your morals die and bury them so far under they don't exist. I can tell you already feel a connection between him and you because I feel it and indulge it much more. Stop trying and just give up."

She faded away from the garden leaving me alone looking at a broken glass. Cracked like my mind!

He controls her and she lets him that's why he calls me by a whole different name. That's his beauty, I'm his beauty.

I can't defeat him and if I keep trying I will start to lose much more than a baby, I will lose myself from within.

"WAKE UP!"

I jolted out of my dream breathing heavily my hand placed on my chest matching the pace it was going.

"Hi gatta!"

"What-t are you doing here?"

He walked over to my bedside table placing a pill and a glass of water.

"Nightmares are a bitch, but some tell us the secrets we don't want to know .... Get some sleep princess." He didn't utter around word just turned around and left.

I know Beast did this, he sent the pill it's a sleeping pill to put me back to the state only he can control. I knew it when I felt that strange coldness around me, it was him. He was watching over me as I murmured and squirm surrounded by everything dark.

"Why should I?"

Because you know it guarantees your survival.

"I don't think I can hold myself for that long!"

Don't try to think just let me take full control to help you understand who he really is.

It felt weird talking to myself seeing as I wasn't myself anymore, I was two people that didn't know who to survive in one body.

A body that he will continue to take at his disposal and I won't fight back anymore, I'm done.

------

I woke up alone remembering everything that occurred last night feeling confused but relief that it was a dream. More like nightmare! I got dressed looking at my appearance closely wondering what I could do to change it.

I skipped downstairs hearing grunts and laughing walking in the kitchen seeing Lyric and Azar talking and Carmelo talking on the phone. But no Beast in sight not surprising...

"Look who's awake! You sure slept in later than usual."

"Yeah, I had a lot to think about." Me and Carmelos eyes connected breaking apart as he walked out the kitchen in a hurry.