Evermore (Vampire Knight fanfiction.)

24 - "Don't leave me," he beg.

Resha Valentine

I thought that after Kaname teased me last night. And my heart was about to explode from my body, I would be fine. But right now, 'm laying on my bed, doesn't feel well at all. If I'm the strongest, why do I feel like as if I'm the weakest? I sigh in desperation, as I feel another heart beat. Blood flowing in front of me, and a faint sound of calm breath.

Turning my eyes, In front of me there's Kaname, sleeping in peace with his hand near mine. His long hair is messy, and he's wearing his black shirt. He's in a deep sleep, probably tired... I didn't know when he fell asleep last night because I was asleep first.

I'm looking at his beautiful face when it hit me. His neck. Looking so delicious, and tempting. I brush his hair away from his neck lightly, and staring at it. Looking at the veins inside. Even though I'm satisfied enough, I will never feel enough. I will always want more. That's the true nature of every living things. Even if I did drink his blood now, I'm afraid I will actually kill him...

Controlling myself, I ended up gave his neck a light kiss. Slowly, and then his cheek and his lips. Why do I kiss him so much these days? Is it because of puberty? After I'm done talking nonsense, I got up and make a distance with him, knowing I'm not in a good state right now.

"Things do change, don't they?" He said. I turned around to see him, awaken. His hand holding mine, don't want to let go of me.

I'm turning around, smiling, taking his hand from mine and kisses it.

"Don't leave me," he beg, his sad eyes looking at me with agony inside it.

How can I?

I laid myself beside him like before, looking at his sleepy eyes, struggle to open because he's been so tired these past days. I caress his cheek, and his head. Kaname's hand is looking for mine, and kiss it without his eyes leaving my eyes. He always does that.

"Goodnight, Kaname," I said.

"Don't go."

He closed his eyes once again, falling into the deep sleep, seems like he's relaxed, probably because I'm here for him. "What do I... What do we... Feel about each other?" I asked, mostly to myself. "I'm used to being alone, but do you, Kaname?"

After a while, I walked out from the bedroom, this time when I glanced over to make sure once again, he's still closing his eyes.

*********

I've never really think about that. What are we?

"Ah, Resha-sama," Aido said, looking surprised to find me in the lobby.

Talk about the first thing I see outside is him. Not a good sign. "Eh... Good morning Aido."

There's silence standing between us. I feel bad to ignore him, but I also feel bad inviting him because... You know... He's in love with me. It's all awkward now. I shouldn't have drunk his blood.

"Um, are you alright, Resha-sama?" He ask, in a nervous tone, wondering whether if he should ask about it or not.

I looked at him. "Why?" That's the simplest answer. Is everything I'm currently feeling can easily be decipher by someone? Am I really that predictable?

"You looked so... Distant. It's like you're not being yourself." He's worried. He's always worried about me. It's funny.

I don't have any answer for that. I don't know how am I supposed to answer him.

"I'm alright." I smiled like usual. There's no way I'm telling him that I'm sick again or he will throw his neck at me again.

Kaname is planning something behind me, I know. I always try to deny it, but I know he's planning something. A big plan, that will change the Vampire's race.

I pour my blood tablets to my tea and drink it. Just thinking about blood is making me crazy, but sick at the same time.

Suddenly, Aido lean to the table. To me. "Are you... Hungry?"

My gaze turn from my tea to him. He's offering it? Again? "Well I didn't eat last night so..."

"You know you can be satisfied without food, Resha-sama."

Knowing what he meant, I put down the cup. "That was an accident, Aido, and I won't do that again as long as I have a clear... Mind. And you shouldn't offer people easily like that."

"I don't usually offer people like this... it's just because—" he looked away.

Because it's me.

"Seriously, you worry me a lot, Aido." I turn my conversation with him. "How could you go around and offer purebloods to drink your blood? What if someone other than me drink it and you end up dead?"

It feels like I'm scolding him, but it's true. He should draw some line to me or else this is not going to end up well. "More than anyone else, I would be grateful if it is you," he whispered.

I feel like I'm going to die hearing that. "Treasure your life more, Aido, please."

He nodded as an answer.

**********

In my room, Kaname is still soundly asleep. I lay myself down again with my face facing his chest. He's never a heavy sleeper, he always wakes up when the little disturbance happens.

"I'm sorry to wake you."

He smiles, "where have you been?"

"Just out for a while," I whispered.

Suddenly, his eyes looking at me intensely. He's staring so deeply. "What will you do if... I die?" Kaname asked.

Honestly? I have no idea. He's the center of my universe. He's the yin for my yang. He's someone you can only met one or two times in this life... "I don't know... I can't even imagine it... I've lived my whole life with you...." As I'm saying that, I frown. "I have no other reason to continue living."

He chuckled. "Lets just go back to sleep. I'm sorry for the sudden topic."

"Why the sudden idea? Did you have a nightmare?"

He moves his face closer to mine, until our forehead touch each other instead of answering my question. "Was the dream really bad?" I asked again.

He doesn't answer to me but I know he had a nightmare because this is his habit. This happens a lot. So I circle my hands around his neck and hug him. "Should I shoo the bad dreams away?" I asked. My mother used to say this when I had bad dreams. When I was little though. But I hope Kaname can smile again.

Kaname grinned. "Why am I the one getting embarrassed?"

As I slowly feel myself drift back to sleep, I can hear his words while kissing my fingertips and every inch of my hand. "It was really bad." Kaname muttered under his breath.

"What was it about?" With my last strength, I asked.

"You."