Take Two (Queen/Borhap Fanfic)

Chapter 65: Lilly

I sat down on the bed with Roger, trying to prepare myself for what I was about to say. It was silent for a while, prompting Roger to speak. 

"Lilly," he said. "Please just tell what's bothering you." I took a deep breath and started to explain myself.  

"When we were arguing earlier and I Ieft the room," I said. "I went down to the lobby to get a snack. When I was down there, I saw Winter outside smoking. I went out to see her and..." I trailed off. 

"And what?" Roger said. "Did you smoke?" I shook my head. "Well was she doing something harder?" Roger asked.

"No," I said. "I didn't smoke and there were no drugs or alcohol involved."

"Ok," he said. "No drugs, no alcohol... well I know you didn't sleep with Winter." Roger laughed softly, but I kept a straight face. He stopped laughing and looked at me. "You slept with Winter?" He asked.

"Of course not!" I said. "I just kissed her!"

"You kissed her?" Roger yelled, quickly standing up from the bed. 

"I know it was stupid," I said. "But I realized it really quickly! I swear we were only on her bed for like a minute-"

"On her bed?" Roger interrupted. "You went up to her room with her?" 

"Yeah, but nothing happened!" I said. "Well... we kissed for a while, but nothing more!"

"So what are you attracted to women all of the sudden?" Roger snapped. 

"No!" I said. "Maybe... I don't know! But I do know I'm still attracted to you and I love you!" I went to touch his arm, but he pushed me away. 

"Don't," he said with tears forming in his eyes. "How could you do this to me?" 

"Baby, I'm so sorry," I said. At this point, I was starting to cry again too. "I swear it meant nothing."

"I'll never understand why people think that makes it better," Roger said. "You risked our relationship for something that meant nothing? I would rather it mean something. At least then you would have a good excuse, but this... this was just stupid, Lilly."

"I know," I said. 

"We've been together for almost a year," he said. "And you just threw it all away."

"No," I cried. "I didn't throw it away! It was just one mistake!"

"A big mistake," Roger said quietly. 

"Yes," I said. "It was a big mistake. I know that." Roger looked down and wiped a few tears away without saying anything. "Roggie, please," I said softly. "I love you. Please tell me what I can do to fix this." 

"Get out," he said without looking up.

"What?" I said, taken aback by his response. 

"I don't want you in here," he said. "I just, need some time to think. I need you to leave."

"No, Roger, please," I cried. "Please, can't we talk about this? I love you, I don't want to lose you!"

"You hurt me, Lilly," he said, crying softly again. "Out of everyone I know, I thought you were the only one who would never hurt me, but I was wrong."

"Baby, I'm so sorry," I cried. I tried getting closer to him, but he stood up and backed away from me. 

"I really think you should go," he said. "I think... I think we need a break." 

"I don't want to take a break," I choked out through tears. 

"Well I do," he said. "I don't want you here right now. Just go, please." 

"Roger-"

"Now!" He shouted suddenly. I jumped at the volume of his voice and started to collect some things to leave. I cried softly as I left the room. My tears started to flow harder as I walked down the hallway. I didn't know where I was going at first, but somehow I ended up in front of Freddie's bedroom door. I knocked rapidly and he answered after a few seconds.

"Who is knocking at-" he stopped talking suddenly when he saw my face. "Darling, what's wrong?"

"Is Jim sleeping here?" I asked. Freddie shook his head. 

"He went back to New York early. His school year starts before ours."

"Then can I sleep here?" I asked. 

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" He asked. 

"I think Roger and I are done," I cried, breaking down completely. 

"What?" Freddie said. "Why? What happened?"

"I did something stupid," I said. "I was hanging out with Winter and she kissed me and for some reason, I kissed her back and we ended up making out in her room, but then I stopped it and I tried explaining it to Roger, but he was really hurt and angry and he kicked me out and I don't know what to do!" I started crying harder and Freddie pulled me in for a hug. 

"It's alright, darling," he said. "You can stay here tonight and we'll figure everything else out later. Ok?" I nodded and nuzzled my head into his chest. He let me in and offered me the bed. I lied down and Freddie grabbed one pillow and the fuzzy red blanket I gave him when he was in the hospital. He brought it with him on tour and I thought that was sweet.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"You can I have the bed," Freddie said. "I'll sleep on the floor."

"Freddie, that'll kill your back," I said. Freddie shrugged. "Why don't you just sleep in here with me?" I asked. 

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Freddie asked. "Roger is already angry about you doing something with Winter."

"Freddie you're gay," I said. "Nothing is going to happen between us. You're my best friend. I just... I just need you to be with me right now." Freddie nodded hesitantly and climbed in bed with me. He threw his blanket over both of us and I snuggled under it.

"This blanket is really soft," I whispered.

"It is," Freddie whispered back. "I wonder who got it for me." I giggled softly and then whimpered into the pillow. Freddie moved closer to me and wrapped his arm around me. 

"What are you doing?" I asked. Freddie looked down and quickly moved his arm away. 

"Sorry darling," he said. "I guess I was spooning you. I always do that for Jim when he's sad, I guess it's just instinct."

"It's alright," I said. "Everyone likes to cuddle." Freddie smiled and wrapped his arm back around me. I snuggled closer to him and we both closed our eyes. 

"Freddie," I said softly. "I don't know what I'm going to do. I can't lose Roger." Freddie sighed and kissed my head. 

"Go to sleep darling," he said quietly. "Everything will work out eventually. I promise."