~Alice's P.O.V.~
I wanted to talk to someone, but I had no one to talk to. I lost Bella, and Jake, and those were the closest people to me. I lost both of them for stupid things that I did. Why do I have to be so dumb? God. I hate myself.
I began to shiver really bad so I tried to gain my balance and stand up. I finally calm myself down from crying. I head inside, and close the door behind me. I walk up the stairs and head in my room. I lay down on my bed and look up to the ceiling. I then decided that I had to learn to be independent. I had to learn to not rely on anybody. I tried to calm myself down again. I sat up and inhaled and exhaled. I have to learn to not become emotionally attached to anybody. I have to fight my feelings for anybody and everybody. I let out a sigh.
"Jake and I are no longer together", I whisper, trying to convince myself. I try my best not to get emotional
"He was nobody important in my life", I reply. It gets easier to control my feelings. I let out another sigh.
"Bella was just someone caring , that's it", I whisper.
"Ace was nobody", I reply once again
"That's it", I reply convincing myself, that everybody around me were just people. They were just people in my life. I should learn to depend on myself and only myself. I let out a final sigh, and lay down feeling comfortable with myself. I finally drift off to sleep.
-
I wake up to the sound of the alarm. I open my eyes, and the glaring red numbers were clear to see. I sit up, and rub my eyes. I let out a big yawn, I get out of bed and head to the bathroom, and to the usual. After about 10 minutes or so, I head out and change I put on some skinny jeans and a shirt. I put on some make up, and do a fishtail in my hair. I head downstairs, and grab an apple from the fruit tray. I plop myself on the sofa and turn on the tv. After I was done with my apple, I stand up and quickly brush my teeth I grab my backpack and swung it over my shoulder. I look up at the clock and it was 7:47 I head out the door, and close the door behind me.
I walk to my school and it only took 20-25 minutes. I open the school doors, I felt the wave of freshness hit me, as if you were walking in to a store. I look up at the clock and it was 8:10 meaning I had time, so I decided to double check all my teachers to check if I don't have any missing papers. I heard the bell ring, meaning that I had to go to first period. I walked over to my first class, and took notes as if it was any other day. As if nothing happened yesterday. Emily and I had small talk, but that was really it. To be honest, it's hard to be independent. I hated the feeling of being alone, and not talking to anybody. It feels as if i'm pushing everyone away. No, Alice it's probably because your so new to it. Yeah, it had to be it.
The bell rung meaning class ended. I got out of my seat and headed to my next classroom. Jake, and Bella were in my next class . Of course I was extremely nervous. My hands began to get really clammy. I walk in the classroom and sit where I usually sit. I take out my usual supplies. After a couple of seconds I then see Bella walk in the classroom. She walked away and sat in a different seat. I hate this feeling. What am I supposed to do? Just sit here and do nothing? I let out a sigh. The bell soon rung meaning that class begun. I'm not surprised Jake came. I have to get over him. I have to get over Bella. I just need to meet new people. That's it.
-
School ended. I feel like crap. I feel alone. I needed something to take my mind off things. So I decided to get a job at the mall. It wasn't that far away from my house so I headed my way there. Usually Bella and I come here, and try out as many outfits as possible. I smile at the memory. Why is this so hard? Many people come here so it's not surprising if you see someone you know here. Bella and I usually met a lot of friends here...Alice stop. I enter the mall, and look for shops that needed employees. I later found a Pacsun shop that needed employees. I enter the shop, and they happily gave me the job. They told me I will start to work tomorrow.
