5SOS doctor/ dentist imagines

Doctor (Imagine for yadaschreijer)

*trigger warning*

It was easy getting round school.

Well... not easy. Not even close, but I had ways to avoid the germs.

If you don't talk to anyone, you don't have to shake hands. If you walk behind people, you don't have to use the doorknob. If you wipe the desk down, and only use your own pens then you can't be given germs.

Hoodies can protect your arms, and automatic taps were life savers.

You couldn't use the school toilets though, or take part in pe, or go to parties.

And it makes you lonely. And it makes you hurt, and it makes you angry and scared, and... depressed.

But cutting gave relief. It cleaned out my body, and relieved the tension, and gave me control.

I sat at my desk, knee bouncing, pen tightly gripped in my hand. Someone in the classroom had a cold- it could pass. My focus kept slipping in and out until I heard my name.

"Yada, Holly, Jake. You need to head to the office,"

I packed my back, quickly tagging on the end of the line before the door shut. It was nicer when the hallways were empty, no opportunity to walk into people.

"Yada, you're in room one for your checkup," she said, directing me down a hall.

A checkup.

With people touching me. With tools touching me. I felt my chest tighten as I reached the door, the thought of them touching me taking over. My palms started sweating, and I was almost crying when the door opened.

"Oh, hello,"

"Don't touch me,"

"Woah, hey, I wasn't going to. I'm Ashton, are you our patient?"

I nodded, my eyes welling up.

"You're scared?"

"Not of you- well of you but not really,"

"Sorry?"

"I don't want you to touch me, or for the tools to touch me, or anything. I don't want the dirt touching me," I stressed, looking him dead in the eye.

"None of our stuff is dirty sweetheart, the main rule of doctor's tools is to make sure it's clean. If you want, we can clean them again together?"

"And wipe the bed,"

"Of course, come inside and we can start okay?"

He held the door open and I entered the large room, three other doctors sat in there. I stood in the middle of the room, feeling vulnerable and exposed.

"Yada and I are going to clean the tools, just to make sure," he announcer, "That's Luke, Calum and Michael. Luke and I take turns while Michael and Calum are taking notes,"

He let me take a wipe and clean the bed, then we put gloves on the cleaned the tools.

"Thankyou for doing this," I said quietly, "I just can't,"