Set You Free (CANEM)

XXXII

For the first time, he stepped foot in what he had been told was her new home.

The expanse of the grounds surprised him as it took him a little while to spot the house itself. It lay tucked away in amongst a smattering of trees.

He knew he shouldn't be there.

But he couldn't help it. He couldn't keep away.

Recently, she had clouded his head every minute of everyday. It was that sweet kind of pain that made him whine in agony but at least his mind was filled with her. She haunted his dreams. He wanted her back even though he knew he didn't deserve her.

People said the pain dulled with time, and that things would get better, but they didn't. If he stopped to dwell for even a fraction of a second, the pain would start once again in his body. 

He knew it was wrong to think of her, he was the one who left her.

He tried his best not to ask but he did so anyway, almost out of his own control.

Emre had told him everything, well everything that he could.

How she had published the book and moved away from her parents with the revenue. Further and further out of his reach. Naturally, he knew about the book but he couldn't bring himself to read it. The bitter sentences would probably make him feel guiltier than he already was. Nevertheless, he followed her success with pride, as if anybody would make it as an exceptional writer, it was her.

The only negative from this was that Yiğit had taken his place. 

Due to his own faults, a year had passed and the two men had switched places. Another man was now providing for her, giving her opportunities to succeed. In his head, the fact that the man stood beside her instead of him kick-started the sadness within himself.

Only recently had he engaged with his contacts. The endless days of nothingness had rotted away what remained of him and he yearned to be part of society again, even if that society did not want him. 

Metin was the first and he built up from there. They told him how they saw her occasionally and from what they thought, it looked like she had moved on. The thought broke him. 

But of course, why wouldn't she?

Little by little, he heard pieces of news that coaxed out a rare smile on his face. 

Leyla was pregnant and her and Emre were living together happily. He could not deny that he was envious but he was glad his younger brother had a happy future ahead of him. He was now part of solid family with a mother and father in law to support them.

He couldn't even imagine how Mevkibe would view him now. He was the enemy for breaking her daughter's heart and he knew it. The strong bond they once had, smashed the smithereens. He feared for the look on her face if he was to ever see her again, now that he was coming out of the darkness.

The company had also gone under. That was what he had been told.

The lack of funding and leadership was a few of the many factors. He was unsure of how any of the other employees were doing or where they were working but Metin had dealt with the remnants.

It was unfortunate but honestly, he had been away for so long and he knew she had left the office after he did, so it no longer bothered him.

His father, on the other hand, did mind.

It felt like almost an eternity but the man had finally returned home. Can had not seen him yet but he knew that these days, Emre was settling him back into life in Istanbul. He had heard that Aziz bey was deeply saddened by the loss of his company that had been growing for over forty years. It was another thing that added to the growing list of Can's guilt.