Decisions (EDITED)

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I have been practicing my lines the entire morning. I woke up really early around five so that I could have more practice time since my audition was at 10am. So I knew I had some time left to go over the lines over and over and over again. I even made this honey, cinnamon and water concoction to help with my vocals. I want my voice to be completely smooth when I finally audition.

I really have a good feeling about this, things will work out I know they will.
I can not wait to see myself on the big stage.
One day I will be making movies with the well knows producers of the world.
I believe in dreaming big, the sky is not even the limit for me.
All I have to do is nail this audition and I know doors will start opening up soon.

Emily agreed to drop me off at my audition before she goes to work. So that is one weight lifted off my shoulders since I do not have to hail down a taxi.
.......

"We are really sorry Miss Massey, but we already found the perfect person for the role, we would have called sooner but the lady we chose just left"

I am honestly stunned, I got up super early to prepare for this audition and I don't even get to audition. I thought we were all supposed to be given a chance before a person got chosen. I can not help but think my father has something to do with this, this doesn't just happen or does it? I'm really confused right now. What am I going to do now? Do I go back to my dad and beg him to take me back? What do I do now?

I cannot expect Emily to take care of me. That's a lot to ask for even from your best friend. I know she won't mind but I hate being a burden on anyone, that's just not how I was raised.

I don't even have enough money to sustain me here. I'm just going to have to suck it up, I can't just give up after two days. I guess I should ask Emily to help me find me a job as a waitress while I try to find more acting jobs. I wont give up, I won't go back home and work for my father. I hated accounting and finance, honestly I just majored in it to please my father. I am done doing stuff to please other people. It's about me and what I want from this point on.

My dad would probably be happy if I cower and go back home to work in his company
I do not want to give him that satisfaction, I don't even know why I think he would just welcome me with open arms. He did disown me. My dad is one tough nut to crack anyway. He would not just forgive me that easily.
I remember the time my brother snuck out of the house when he finished highschool.

My dad had told him that he had to stay at home that Friday night because there had been robberies going on in our neighborhood so my dad did not want any of us out incase those turned into kidnappings and killings.

My brother left the house anyway, my dad was so furious, he grounded my brother for two full months and he ignored him during those months also. My brother Marcos is my father's favorite child. I mean he is the only one who had showed interest in his company and if he could ignore his favorite son for a whole two months what chance did I have.

I have always been Mommy's little princess, her passing was not easy on all of us, but i took it the worst because i was honestly always with her, she would always let me play with her beautiful hair every single day and that was our bonding time.

Anyway back to reality

I really have a big decision to make at the end of the day.
Do i go back to my dad's house or stay here and try to make ends meet. I mean it was just one audition right, its not like i will run into the same luck every single time I audition.
I want to live out my mom's dreams because she had to give up her dreams of acting in movies because she had to take care of us. She got pregnant just as her career was taking off and she chose to be a mom than be an actress.

...........
What do you think Amanda should do?
Should she go back home and ask her father to take her back and work in the one job she hates most?

Please comment and vote

I am finally editing this book, i will be adding more information to the book now. I wrote this when i was 16 and i believe now i have more to offer.

Thank you.

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