Letters To Juliet

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So it's been 7 months now since Zende moved in and it has been the best 7 months of my life.
I ended up deciding to start having breakfast and dinner with Zende. It was hard having to avoid him when he decided to start working from home more often.

I didn't know someone could be so devoted to his family like this truthfully.

FLASHBACK

I wake up and check the time and I realise it's 9am. I have never slept this late ever since I gave birth to my children. The trips usually wake me up at around 5am since I always have the baby monitor with me. So I don't get how they aren't up yet.
Zende usually goes to work at 7am and I know this because I always hear him talking to the kids everyday before he goes to work through the baby monitor.
I start panicking now as everytime after he leaves I get up and bath them then feed them again after their 5am feeding time.
I read somewhere that babies have to eat every two hours.

I rush to their room and I find them sleeping peacefully with their clothes changed.
" I gave them a bath and fed them also, I guess those pumps were really necessary. I thought you might appreciate a break"
I turned and saw him standing by the door.
"Ummm, aren't you suppose to be at work by now?" I ask
"I decided to stay home today" as he says this he steps in the room and walk over to Phoebe's crib which is by the window.

"ummm, thanks for bathing them"i don't know what to else to say.

"You don't have to thank me for taking care of my children Mandy, they are my responsibility too, and I wanted to give you time to yourself.
I took the week off so you can have time to yourself to do anything you want."

"Okay,well I will go downstairs to make breakfast then, unless you ate already."

"you can go take a shower and I will make breakfast, umm you have milk stains on your sleeping dress. Should I go get the pump for you?" I look down and I realize I'm leaking.
I cover my breasts with my hands.

"it's fine, I will get it myself."I say

"Mandy can you please try to meet me half way, I'm trying here" he pleads with me.
I just look at him since I don't have a response.

He comes and stands in front of me. He then leans down and kisses me on my forehead.
"I will go and make breakfast, I was waiting for you to get up so we eat together" he then turns and leaves the room.
I turn and look down at Dylan.
"What am I going to do about your father Dyl" I whisper.
Before I leave the room to my own to go shower I give my babies all a kiss and I go take a shower.
..........
I am looking at my closet deciding on whether to go down stairs or not when I hear a knock on my door. I stall a bit, and when I go open the door there is no one there but only a tray with a plate with chocolate muffins, mixed fruit and a tall glass of orange juice. I then see a letter on the side also.

I take the tray in my room and put the tray on my tables then I open the letter. I decide to eat while reading.

Dear Mandy
I just want to apologize for everything, I know you won't forgive me in a day but I want to try to make things better for the both of us. I won't push you anymore to do anything you don't want to do.
I can see you don't want to spend time with me at the moment and I will respect your wishes. But I cant move out of the house, I want to be a present father, I want to help you take care of Dylan, Phoebe and  Jayden.
I want our children to grow up in a loving home and we can't provide that for them if we don't solve the issues between us. I know I told you my reasons but I know it wont be easy to forget the pain I put you through.I will try to stay out of your way as you wanted but I ask that you continue to allow me to feed the kids from time to time and  make dinner at least twice a week.
I want to give you the time you need to come to terms with me staying here full time because I want to be there for their first word, walk and even when they loose their first teeth. I want to be there so they can have an extra shoulder to cry on when they get their first heartbreak Amanda.
And I will stop pushing for the kids to have my name I will leave that decision with you. I want you to learn to trust me.
The only way we can be great parents is if we work together and we are at peace and comfortable in each other's presence. I will be outside if you need me and I have the other baby monitor with me.

Love
Zende

Wow, that was totally unexpected. I didn't know he could cook or maybe he meant buying take outs or something.
I begin to feel a bit guilty over the way I have been treating him all this time. The poor guy is really trying.

I decide to go down stairs and the whole house is clean. How did he manage to clean the house and bathe the trips and feed them in the process also.
I will just see how he does this week and maybe I might forgive him. I have never been good with holding grudges anyway.
Since there was nothing to do around the house I decide to upstairs and read the script Jay sent me yesterday.
Maybe I should get a nanny when the kids are around 6 months so I can go back to work.
I better discuss that with Zende just not today.
My mind keeps going back to that letter. Maybe I should just allow the kids to have his name, or maybe it's the guilt talking.
The house seems too quite since they kids are sleeping.
I go to the kitchen with the intention of washing the baby bottles so I can draw milk from my breasts, I also find the bottles washed.
That's makes me smile because it shows he really is trying.

I take the bottles and pass by the nursery and get the breast pump so I go pump some milk into the bottles.
When I finish I go place the bottles in the fridge for Zende.

End of flashback

Zende kept to his promise to me, he kept his distance and 2 weeks after he wrote me that letter I decided to start having breakfast and dinner with him.
I could see how happy he was when one morning he came knocking at my bedroom door as he always did with his tray and put it besides my door. I opened the door and took the tray and went downstairs where I found him sitting at the dinning table with his laptop open but his mind was clearly somewhere else. He also had his breakfast with him which was untouch.
I just took the tray and placed it on the table and sat down and begun eating.

He looked up and I saw the most beautiful smile he had ever given me.
He immediately closed his laptop and gave me his full attention even though I didn't even know what to say to him at that moment. But it felt great to have his attention.
I knew right there and then that I made the right decision. It was time to  move on and let go of the past. We were not going to be best friends or anything, but we had 3 children together so we had to get along.
The one thing that scared me most though was my growing feelings for Zende. I just don't want to go through what I went through before.

It just became a norm from there and we just started eating dinner and breakfast together.
Now that the kids are 7 months and they don't spend all their time sleeping they sit with us while we eat mostly dinner after we have fed and bathed them.

I realized that the kids love to be bathed by their father more so I let him do that while I take care of the feeding . I guess it might be because he let's them play in the water for while and I do not.

We decided to introduce baby food to the trips when they were around 5 months old. I still nurse them but maybe next month when they are 8 months that's when we will decide to stop giving breastmilk  completely and start on the powdered milk for babies.
It was a long hard process for the trips to accept food.
Dylan was more accepting thank God, he is going to grow up to be a very sweet boy. He never troubles us at all honestly. Only cries at times when he is cranky.
Jayden however was another story, he refused anything but milk for a while.

Right now I give them powdered milk during the night and in the morning only.
During the day we feed them baby food and let them drink plenty of water which was boiled first ofcourse.

..........................
Heyy beautiful people.
I hope you guys are enjoying the novel.

Am I the only one who feels Zende is doing his level best to impress Mandy.
It seems it's finally working.

Please do
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Well on other news!
I am happy to announce that
I have started writing another novel so please be on the lookout for it. I will be updating the first chapters soon enough.
Im so excited about sharing it with you guys.
Don't be left out okay💕💕
I'm pretty sure you guys won't be disappointed with it.

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