Gangsta's Paradise

Twenty Six

October 26, 2013

Nicki

I haven't received any hints or anything else from who I believe to be Blaze. Today Meek made me reserve for me and him and I have no idea what this nigga got planned.

For all I know we could be going to make a lick together. He was still sleeping when I get up to make us some breakfast.

"Meek" I say going up stairs. I put his plate on the nightstand.

"What?" He asks in a raspy voice. I bite my lip.

"I made breakfast" I say.

"Ard " he says getting up. I grab my plate and turn the tv on Ellen.

"Thank you" he says after time of him eating.

"You're welcome" I say going to the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face. Leaving out I take our plates down to the kitchen and go back up.

"Rocko get out" I hear him say. She runs past me out the room and I see him walking out the bathroom. He gets into the bed and looks at me  as I go to grab a hair tie to put my hair up in a ponytail.

"What?" I ask.

"You been asking all this week what we gone do and when today finally come you don't wanna ask?"

"No. Cause if I do all you'll tell me is to wait or shut up" I say going to sit on the bed. I hear him chuckling.

"You know I noticed you never let me see what you got from Victoria's Secret that day you went shopping with ya home girls"

"Yes you did"

"Not all of it"

"Maybe I was saving the rest for a special occasion" I say.

"Like what?"

"Like me wearing whatever when I feel like" I say. He sucks on his teeth and lays back.

"Ard then"

"Meek what are we doing today?!" I whine asking. He chuckles. I go and straddle him and he just looks at me. "Seriously"

"Beetle birthday bash"

"What?"

"We got together on the 26th of May. It's now October" he says.

"We been kickin it for five months" I say realizing.

"Mhm" he says. I giggle.

"You pay attention to that?"

"I know you have" he says. I cackle.

"I didn't think you'd wanna celebrate it"

"Well I actually do" he says. "But it's fine if you-"

"I do wanna celebrate it. I knew you had something planned but I didn't think it had anything to do with us like this"

"Oh you must think I can't be romantic"

"I know you can be romantic. I realized that from me being sick" I say. He smirks up at me.

"I just admire you as my woman and what we got going I feel is real" he says. I look to him and smile.

"So what's planned?"

"You don't wanna have no serious discussion with me?"

"Why we gotta be serious?"

"Nicki you don't like being too open when it comes to your inner feelings. I ain't seen you emotional in a soft way except for when Rocko got hit. I mean really what you hiding?"

"I just don't like being vulnerable or soft. My feelings don't always need to be messed with"

"I ain't tryin' to mess with them Nic. I'm jus' tryin' to see who you are and what your feelings for me are"

"You know I'm for you Meek"

"And I'm for you but before we go any further I want you to know you can be comfortable with me"

"That's the problem Meek. I can't be comfortable in a place unfamiliar to my feelings."

"So I make you uncomfortable "

"No" I say getting frustrated. I was about to get off Meek but he holds me down on him.

"Talk to me" he says sitting up against the headboard. "Tell me what I'm not understanding "

"You don't make me uncomfortable. Loving someone again is making me uncomfortable "

"So you think you love me?"

"It's a possibility. I just haven't had someone by my side like you've been and I know I'm comfortable with you because honestly I got comfortable with you when I wasn't trying to" I say.

Meek

Listening to Nicki I know where she coming from. Having so many people walk in and out of ya life make it hard to get comfortable and trust.

"You don't think I feel the same? When I went to my mom about you she mentioned Draya and I went and told her more about you than I intended. And I don't brag about women to my mama" I say making her giggle alittle.

"I just don't wanna feel the pain and the hurt I felt before. I gave you a key to my house and I never ever gave Deuce a key to my house. Hell Rocko wouldn't even want him in the house" she says making me laugh.

"And I ain't never gave no female a key to my crib. I didn't mind giving you a key cause I felt comfortable enough to. And I thought well if Nicki trust me enough for a key to her spot then I guess I can trust her with mine" I say making her laugh.

"I was dating this girl named Nessa. She been with me for four years. Thought I was gonna marry her. We both had our own dreams and shit and then I caught that case with Ronnie. She stuck around but when things got harder on her she left like two months after I got locked. I just thought women were just always around for the luxury of shit, but then I see how you are and how you make your girls be and you get your own. I know you hate depending on men. I see it" I say. I see Nicki's eyes start to water.

"I'm comfortable with you Nic and I trust you and that ain't easy for me"

"I feel the same Meek. I just don't wanna let anything show because I feel like it says I'm weak and you'll walk all over me. I be so tough to others and when they use me it's a reminder when the pain comes that you still have feelings and you still a woman" she says wiping the little tears that escaped her eyes.

"I'm scared of betrayal... what about you?"

"Real love and happiness" she answers.

"Trust me when I say I can give you that" I say.

"I know and I do" she says hiding her face. I moved her hands and kiss her.

"Quit crying. You a bad bitch" I say making her laugh.

"Candi wanted me to be vulnerable with you and I guess I can tell her I did" I chuckle.

"Omelly told me that we some crazy mofos that ain't going no where" I say making her laugh.

"He's right" she says. She leans in and kisses me. Holding her close I kiss her back.

"You wanna get ready and go out now?" I ask. She nods.

"Where we going?"

"Out to eat and then back here " I say lifting up her shirt. She giggles.

"Okay" she says getting up. Watching Nicki go into the closet I know exactly how I want tonight to go.

Shae 💰