young, scrappy and hungry | a hamilton story | √

Chapter 32

The show went extremely well. Carleigh shone onstage, and Kasey was so proud of her friend. After the show ended, Kasey sought out Carleigh to give her a giant hug.

"Now we've both gone on as Schuyler sisters!" she exclaimed.

"Maybe next time, we'll be on together. That would be amazing," Carleigh told her. They headed back to the dressing room and quickly changed into their normal clothes. 

"Tomorrow's a two-show day, right?" Kasey asked as they started walking back to their loft. 

"Yeah, it is," Carleigh said.

"Can we study between shows?" Kasey asked. "I'm getting apprehensive about the test, even though it's, like, a month away."

"Of course," Carleigh said. "I'll make sure to bring the flashcards and the notes."

"Thanks," Kasey said gratefully. Her phone started ringing and she frowned, seeing that it was a call from the British Embassy.

"Have we reached Miss Kasey Elizabeth Winslow?" a voice on the other end said. 

"Yes, this is Kasey," Kasey said. They had stopped walking.

"You may want to sit down."

Kasey felt a plummeting feeling in her stomach. She knew, before the person on the other line said anything, what was going to come out of their mouth.

"We regretfully inform you that Wendy and Paul Shaffer died early this afternoon in an unexpected house fire," the voice said. "We are sorry and extend our greatest condolences. We are in contact with services in the UK and are working to obtain as much information as possible."

Kasey registered the words but didn't process them.

"Thank you," she said, calmer than she ever believed possible, and then hung up. Carleigh was frowning, worry in her dark eyes. 

"What's wrong, Kasey?" she asked gently. 

"It was the British Embassy. My foster parents died earlier today," Kasey said, her breath hitching in her chest. She could feel tears start to gather in her eyes and wiped them furiously away. "I can't, Carleigh, I just can't anymore."

Carleigh enveloped Kasey in a hug. Kasey finally let herself cry for the first time in years, safe within the embrace of her best friend. She could almost imagine that she was with her parents again, or with Wendy and Paul, but instead, she was on the cold streets of New York City, far away from home, and without a family for the second time in her life.

~~~~~

Kasey spent the entire night wrapped in one of Carleigh's hugs. She burrowed her head in Carleigh's sweater and didn't look up until the sun rose the next morning. She could hear her friend's heart beating and knew that Carleigh's presence was one of the only things that was keeping her sane for the moment. 

Carleigh had never seen Kasey so devastated. She knew that her family's death had been hard, but Kasey always seemed to handle it well. She seemed to have accepted the accident. She didn't talk about it much, but Carleigh could always tell that it had shaped who Kasey was. 

And now, Carleigh knew how much her foster parents' deaths had shattered Kasey. Paul and Wendy had become Kasey's family when they fostered her. They treated her like a daughter. Now they were dead, just like her parents.

"Kasey," Carleigh said softly. "I'm going to text Lin and tell him that we're not doing the shows today."

Kasey stirred. "No," she mumbled. "I'm going to do the show."

"Kasey, you need to take some time off, and I'm not going to just leave you here by yourself," Carleigh said firmly. 

"I'm going to do the show," Kasey said, looking up at Carleigh. "If I didn't, I'd just be sitting here feeling sorry for myself."

"You're allowed to grieve. No one will judge you for that," Carleigh told her. "Your foster parents just died, Kasey. Burying all that pain isn't going to make it better."

"I'm so sick of grieving," Kasey said bitterly. "My parents, my brother, the Richard Rodgers shooting, my foster parents... who is it going to be next? You?"

"I'm not going to die, Kasey," Carleigh said, tears forming in her eyes.

"That's what everyone says, but everyone I love dies. In a week you'll probably die and I'm going to be alone," Kasey said, turning away from Carleigh. "What's the point in even trying to love anymore?"

"Kasey..."

"You're my best friend, and I'm so scared of losing you, too," Kasey said. Carleigh wrapped her arms around her small friend. 

"You won't, I promise. I'm always going to be here for you," Carleigh reassured her. "I swear. I won't let anything happen to you anymore."

"They all said that, and they're all dead."

"None of that was your fault, and it wasn't theirs, either. Don't beat yourself up over something that happened outside of your control."

"It's too late."

~~~~~~~~

whoops i did it again