Am I Just A Memory?

Chapter 41

Man Ian is bad....

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<sorry if I go fast; I mean like if I say "7 months later" or "1 month", it's cause I want it to speed up instead of having filler chapters>

I know this book is crappy-I'm so sorry. It's getting worse I can tell /-\ again my apologies for those who have read this and think it's complete shit-
Sorry.
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"A-are you joking? Oh my- are you fucking serious?!" I say on the verge of tears.

"I'm sorry Kate. They needed to do it or you and the baby would've died due to all the blood you were loosing." Selena says to me.

My baby is gone cause of Ian. Next time I see him I swear to god I'm going to k-

"It'll be okay Kate. We'll get through this." Dan says, then comes up to me and kisses for forehead.

"But my baby is gone." I whisper.

My baby...

~•~•~•~ Six Months Later~•~•~•~

May- six months it's been.

Yes it has been six months since I've lost my child... I try not to think about it much, but when I see the ultra-sound picture it just makes me sad.
I wish I would have seen my child.
It would have been about one month or so; around this time... Considering it's been ten (10) months. In total at least.

I haven't let no-one touch me, I'm not ready for another child. What if Ian were to kill my baby again? I don't think I will be able to deal with losing a child twice!

Dan has tried to be 'touchy' with me but, as I said before I'm not ready.
Selena and Anthony have been treating me well, they haven't brought it up.

As for Ian..... I haven't seen him since that day, and I'm planning on not seeing him cause if I do, let's just say I'll end up in jail....

Right now I'm just reading some magazine Selena got me. She's been helping me a lot actually, her and Anthony are working less (which is good to me) so they can be home with me more.

"Hey babe." Dan walks into my room and smiles. Well that was unexpected. I know he has a spare key but- he can't just do that!

"Hello Dan." I say and sit up from bed.
"Hey um do you wanna go out for lunch? I mean you don't have to bu-"
"Dan I would love too, let me get out of my pjs! Just wait in here and read that!" I say and point to the magazine.
"Yes love. But can you change in the room?" He smirks, I just bite my bottom lip.
Should I or should I not? Let's have fun and give it a try!

"But why? I mean the bathroom is right over there." I smile and pick out some black jeans and a 'My Chemical Romance' shirt.

"Babe I've seen you some-what naked before it's alright." He says and picks up the magazine.

"Exactly 'some what'." I laugh and take off my tank-top, then slip on my shirt.
"Deodorant." I whisper to myself.

I get some on and slip off my pj shorts.
I turn around and see Dan just staring at my body.
It's kind of weird, I'm very insecure about that- I mean I'm not the skinniest kind of girl but Dan says I'm 'perfect' so I try to believe that...

"Lovely, ready? I'm hungry!" He whines.
Ugh! But I need to do my hair, put my shoes on, and mak-

"You look fine now c'mon love. Put your shoes on." He stands up and stretches. How did he know what was I thinking?

"Fine," I say and put my socks and converse on.

•~•~After~•~•

"That was really great." Dan says and walks into our (Selena's, Anthony's and my selfs) house.
I look over on the table and see a note.

'Went out for a bit- be home later!
-Selena :)

"Yeah it was! Wait what time is it?" I ask.

"It's two thirty (2:30) exact." He says, well maybe he can stay here for a while more!

"Alright, well let's go in my room and watch tv!" I smile and grab his hand.
I still get that warm feeling in me every time I touch him.

We went into my room and immediately I lay on the bed and kick off my shoes! Dan just takes off his shoes then lays down next to me.

"Kiss?" Dan ask looking at me with 'puppy dog eyes'.
"Fine. Thanks for lunch." I smile and he leans in.
"Welcome." Right after he said that his lips met mine...

A kiss turns passionate.
A passionate kiss leads to me lying on top of Dan.
That leads us to being half naked (still containing underclothes on).
Which that leads us to- I think you know.....

What am I doing?! I just lost my baby less than six (6) months ago and I'm having sex already. What- I wish I wouldn't have done this.