Through The Dark COMPLETED

Chapter 15

There was no convincing Harry to let her go back to LA after the hell they'd gone through that morning. Amanda and Julie were on the band's plane with them. It was kind of surreal. Julie and Harry were sitting across from Niall and Amanda facing each other. Harry and Niall had both fallen asleep quickly.

Amanda looked at Julie. "JJ, are you ok? Really? Were you seriously on the ledge?"

"Yeah, I was, Panda. It was a way to think about something else. I'm petrified of heights, so the adrenaline gets my mind off....him....and the pain and the situation. I wasn't going to jump, if that's what you're asking."

"Well, no more ledges. Come to me. I will find a way to scare you. I can't lose you. You are my best friend and like my sister." Amanda said.

"I'm going to try, Panda. I am. For the first time in forever, I feel like I finally have people who truly care. It scares me, but in a completely different way. I love you, and I've grown rather fond of Niall. Zayn, Louis, and Liam are great. And Harry has just gone beyond expectations. I've never had people fight for me the way you have and the way they have. It's hard, but I'm going to try to change." Julie said to her.

"Not change. You're perfectly fine just as you are. Just try not to hide so much. I get why you go to that place in your head. But before you do, remember there will always be disagreements or fights, but that does not mean it's going to end or become violent. It won't be easy. I get that. But we can get through it together."

"I will try my best." She said. "But I can promise I will make more than one mistake."

"And that's fine. We aren't going anywhere, JJ. Especially me. You got me for life."

"I'm gonna need that, Panda. I know it already."

Amanda fell asleep next. Julie sat staring out the window. It was one of the most emotional times of her life. She was still confused and hurting, but she didn't want her friends to hurt and constantly watch her freak out. She had to get control of it enough to deal with it going forward, without pushing them away. It wasn't going to be easy. Everything that had happened in the past had been pushed aside for so long, because she didn't want to admit that she'd let it happen to her. No one could convince her it wasn't her fault for staying. Harry was completely different though. There was just a part of her that couldn't help but think that everything was too good. She was waiting for it to implode on her. Part of her couldn't accept that someone like him really wanted someone like her. She took a deep breath and looked at him. But she liked the feeling he gave her. She liked how he tried really hard to be with her, even though she pushed him away. God, she hoped she would be able to figure out a way past this to be with him. She couldn't stop the tears. She took his hand and held it. Even though he was asleep, she just wanted to touch him.

Harry slowly opened his eyes. He saw Julie holding his hand and looking out the window. He was relieved she seemed mostly back to her normal reactions to him. He'd never had to deal with such an emotional thing in a relationship, new or not. He kind of pulled on her hand. He smiled when she looked at him. "Hey, don't cry." He reached up with his other hand and wiped her tear.

She smiled at him. "Oh, it's just a lot. Not just the past, but now. You and everyone else. I'm just, it's just coming down from all this is difficult. I'm ok though. Really. I will make mistakes I'm sure, but I don't want to think about anyone else but you. I meant it Harry, as hard as it is for me to admit. I've never felt safer than I do with you. I know I don't say it, and I know it's hard for me to show, but I don't know what I would do without you in my life." She wiped her tears.

He sat up and put his arm around her. "I've never heard anything better. But I wish you would sleep. Seems like it's been days."

She laughed. "It has been, but I'm used to it. School and work have kept me up for days at a time. I'm sure some point I will crash. Go ahead and sleep, just let me keep your hand."