Story Time! - I_am_a_psychopath

Return Flight From NYC

*shut up, I didn't misspell the chapter title...

I realise this is a little late (oops) but I've remembered about it now.

Just a 'before we begin' if you're already afraid of flying or may be flying soon then this might not be the most comforting thing to read...it should be fine, honestly! I mean, I'm still alive so it wasn't that bad.

Anyway, let us begin.

So the best part about this flight would definitely be either getting to sit next to my friend (I sat next to a teach on the journey to NY) or the flight staff.

On the way to NY, the flight staff were constantly breathing down our neck and getting angry and being generally horrible - not very nice at all, no. I mean, I know we're wee shitebags but we're still kids. We don't know about being mature.

Whatever though, the flight attendants on the way back? Amazing. They made up for all the bad things about the return flight (and let me tell you, there was a lot of worries...)

These guys were so camp and happy and were making jokes even though I was half asleep when they were feeding me, and I wanted to give them a hug because they were so chill.

They're positivity and they're cheerfulness made the flight better.

Now, you're probably wondering what was wrong with the return flight, seeing as I keep repeating how awful it was...

Where to begin? How about we were late boarding the plane. That's never a good start, right?

So we get on the plane and sit down, everyone's getting settled, etc. I'm checking out what movies and shows are available to watch - not a bad selection if I do say so myself.

I start watching an episode of Fear The Walking Dead but it keeps getting interrupted by the captain announcing some random stuff about delays and apologising for them, etc and by doing so he is interrupting the show and pausing it.

Eventually, I just decide to sit and wait until it's time to take off.

Then these important looking security people are coming onto the plane. Ugh oh, what's happened?

They start getting people to stand up and are checking them, checking their seats and I'm pretty sure bags were pulled down as well and quickly checked.

Not gonna lie, it was a little worrying.

Nothing's happens though, so it's fine. We are fine and we should be taking off soon.

Haha, boy was I wrong!

Turns out someone has left their medication in the bags in the plane, you know, the ones you check in before you board the plane? Yeah. So they need to go out, get the guys back and find this person's bag for the medication.

I'm not being a prick, okay I kind of am, I can understand that they need their medication but come on! Be a bit more responsible, will you? We should be up in the air at this point!

Literally, someone beside me had decided to start watching "Inside Out" you know, the movie where the emotions in the kids' head have emotions? (Logic, Pixar!) And the movie was almost finished by this point.

I'm not shitting you, I promise.

The captain announces that if anyone else needs stuff from below the to ask now because there will be no more times for this to happen. A few more people move and I'm like 'bruh?'

I've gotten through maybe another episode of Fear The Walking Dead when everyone aha returned, the security guys have left with no issues, and we should be taking off soon.

Ha ha ha! Ha.

Captain announces that people will be checking the engines and some other stuff before taking off and I'm like "well shit, they couldn't have done that earlier? Like when the security guys decided to show up?"

We haven't even had the talk that flight attendants do every time you get on a plane yet. It has been over two hours, this person has finished a movie and started another one for god's sake!

I'm seated in the middle of two people, but we're in the middle of the plane right behind the people who are next to the emergency exit at the wing.

I look out the window to see what the guys are doing and that's the moment I start praying to Jesus.

This guy, I S H I T Y O U N O T , is using fucking duct tape on the plane's wing.

THAT is not the most reassuring thing to see before you take off!

I turn to my friend, point it out and say something along the lines of "we're gonna die"

We're both a bit too worn out to care at this point - this trip has drained us and we have reached the stage of "I don't really care at this point" ...or at least I was.

So we take off, and it's dodgy. Turbulence on the takeoff? I ain't used to that.

I fly at least twice a year (because I go abroad like once a year and I gotta get back somehow) and this never really happened.

I'm holding onto my friend's hand now, pretty sure that this is the end of the line for us all.

Once we're in the air, everything is kinda fine except the captain keeps interrupting my movie and TV show time with announcements I couldn't care less at at this point.

Also, the people in front of me have managed to lean their seats back ultimately reducing my space and I have no idea how to move my seat back and I'm too awkward to ask and so I sit for hours with cramped legs...

At least the flight attendants were chill though, and I got to spend time and cuddle with my friend. That was fun.

The rest of it? Not so much...

We somehow managed to get back home semi-on time though which confused me since we literally took off over a movie length later?????? How??????

Oh well, I got back alive which is all that really matters here!

I hope you enjoyed this...experience of mine, and if you have any similar situations worthy of sharing then please do!

PSYCHOPATH OUT!