Survival Under Protection - Book One

15- Knowing The Evil

"What?" Mark replied to me quite irritated.

"I said I want to talk to you. Why do you have to always behave like this?" I asked him while he was still traversing through the menu card. "Can you come to the point already?" He said and he was not even looking at me.

"You still can't get the point? What's wrong with you, Mark? Why do you hate me and my family so much?" I shouted back at him. Years of frustrations and anger were erupting out of me.

"Hey, Mark... uh umm, I can come back to you later." Tony went back to his other customer sensing our heated talk. "I am not in a mood to talk about it," Mark said while he turned back but I pulled his arm, bringing him back.

I was not going to let him go today. All these years I never had this courage. But today I was determined to know it all.

"You have to, Mark! Dad finally told me the reason for which uncle Garry hates me, and somewhere I understand that. But why do you and Gino hate me? Tell me, what wrong did anyone of us did to you?" I hissed at him and he jerked my hand off to get out of my hold, "You ask what wrong you did? You and your family made my life hell!!"

"What?" I gaped at his statement.

"Oh yes. I never got to grow up like a happy and confident child like any other normal child. Whatever I did, dad's family, friends, and even our other relatives always compared to me and Gino to Logan's or Jack's capabilities and sometimes even with John's!! May it be sports or studies and even being a responsible son for their parents, it was always them who were considered first.

You know, how much it hurts, to always be the one who is never good enough, never the grown-up one. Huh? And if any work was to be done by us kids, it was always Logan or Jack. I understand that they were older than me so were selected. But how come our office managers asked Alex and Andy to work on office celebrations or inviting the clients and never me or Gino!! And it was not even the case for me and your... brothers. It was also about my dad. He was the one who started our company. But all the clients liked your dad more and got every deal first to your dad for consulting. For most of the business trips or any achievements, your dad was greeted first, even awarded first.

"They would come to our home but treated my dad like he was the second in position... behind uncle Harry. He never said anything but I know how much he felt left out and inadequate. But how would you know, Ria... the pain I suffered all these years. You were always the favorite one, protected one, the dearest to everyone's heart and lives." Mark was fuming by this time.

I didn't know what to say, I never had this close conversation with him my entire life.

"But you know Ria, these things never hurt me much. I could live with these problems. But my mom and dad, you can't imagine how devastated they were when... when they lost their child, my mum had a miscarriage. You know Ria, she was a girl. I could have had a little sister. But I lost her." Mark said and I could feel a shiver in his voice.

"Mark, I know... but it was not my fault. Please don't blame me for your loss." I said slowly, I wanted to console him but didn't know if he was ready for that.

Mark smirked. "I am not a fool, Ria to blame you for that. But you did a lot of things, for which you should blame yourself. My mum always wanted a daughter and the loss of her child traumatized her, and more when she knew she couldn't have a child anymore. So she imagined you as her daughter, but you were always distant from her.

She was not sane at that time and my father requested your mother to keep you with my mom for some days. But your mother thought that my mom will harm you. It hurt her more than anything else. Harming you would have been the last thing she could do on earth. And she never recovered from her depression. She became distant from everyone and also from her own sons. She would take care of me and Gino but she stopped showing us her affection. Every time she went near you, you would always distant from her and it killed her more and more.

"And you Ria, you have no idea how miserable dad was. My father, he had lost all his hope and you coming in my mom's arm was the only hope we had. And that affects mom till date. She still could not cope up with the shock." Mark was shivering with rage and hurt inside and I was standing next to him hopelessly.

"Mark... why didn't you tell me this before? Why didn't anyone tell me about all this before?" I shouted out in distress and was still gaping because of what Mark said.

"Because dad begged your mom to give you to mom for a few weeks. But your mom, she never let her guard down. Not just your mom, even uncle Harry was too scared of my mom, it seems," Mark shrieked, quoting his last words with his fingers, "So dad restricted mom to come near you. He could not see her crying and pleading in pain and people thinking of her as insane.

But he did not break his relation with your family. You ruined my childhood, Ria.." I saw his eyes filled with tears.

I found my whole body shivering. My legs fumbled against my weight and my throat felt dry inside. "Mark, I... I am-", I went near him to console him with some soothing words and but he moved back angrily.

"It's of no use now, Ria because God took my sister away from me but you, you took my mom away from me!!" Mark roared and I was stood there still. I gasped at Mark's last sentence. It took me a while to absorb everything he said.

I could vaguely recall the instants Mark was talking about. But I do remember a little how aunt Milly would go out of control and used to throw away things and break them and often shout out or scream in distress.

And I would cling into my mum's arms in fear. But I never realized how much I hurt her and I felt sorry for her.

"Mark, I am sorry for everything. I really mean this, Mark. I am ready to apologize to aunt also. But please get back to us like the early days." I pleaded to him.

Mark took a pause for a few seconds, smiled but his smile never reached his eyes, and said, "So, you want me back, Ria. I'll come back and I will get my family back too. But... can you bring back my last 7 years, my mom's love, my peace, my dad's pride and... my happy childhood? Can you?" Marked hissed while he hovered tall over me and I stepped back a little.

"Mark, please, you know I can't do that," I said in a low and sorry voice. "Then I can't go back either, Ria, and neither can I forgive you and your family," Mark replied with a venomous voice.

I was on the verge of crying and didn't want to shed any tear before him. I felt so vulnerable right now. I turned back to the street when Mark yanked me back roughly, "And one more thing Ria, every step you stumble, you will know that that's me. I will never forgive you. And I promise you one thing, you will pay for everything that you did for me!"

He growled with a crooked smile. I gulped back. The version of Mark that opened up to me for the first time in years was gone and I could see the old Mark back.

I saw Gino coming beside Mark and he pulled Mark away from me. "What are you doing here, Mark? I told you not to bother Ria. Now come back!" Gino scolded Mark and took him back to their home's direction.

I watched them going away and every word Mark spoke was stabbing me inside. I felt sorry for him, sorry for us. How much I wished for the things to turn upside down.

Why couldn't we move to normalcy? Why couldn't we have been friends? Gino and Mark were our cousins, after all, my only cousins. And cousins are meant to be friends and protecting one another from parents, older brothers. How much I wish I could change this. I wish I could bring back the happiness in my parents' life.

"Ria, you okay, come here?" Joe came to me in another minute and hugged me as he saw a streak of tear on my cheek. "Joe..., I tried but couldn't mend our relations. I feel like a loser."

I wept softly, ruining Joe's shirt and he allowed me. "Shhh, no, you are not. Calm down, dear. But now let's go back before the hulks come searching for us." Joe said and I chuckled at that.

Hulk was our code word for our older brothers and we marched to our Chevy.