Out Of My Limit

chapter 39

(Kimberly)

Everything seems quiet, not one noise was made. I don't hear my mom voice or Kenny or Logan. Everything is just silence. The news actually broke me down, even if I try to bring myself up, I'll fall back down, even if I try to be strong about this and be there for him I tend to fail and be mad at him. My head would come up with reason why not to be with him.

One, because he can fall for her the more they hang out for the baby.

Two, he can just kiss her of happiness in front of me and I don't wanna see that.

And their even more reason...

They are going to become a family if I like it or not. He needs to be there for his son or daughter and I don't want to be in the middle of that.

As I lay there on the floor of my bedroom, the ceiling looks like it's spinning and its soon going to eat me alive. Okay maybe not but that how I feel. empty.

After I was done talking on the phone with Grayson, he told me he would swing by to check up on me but he won't tell Ethan.

There was a knock at my door and i just keep ignoring it. The knocks happen for like once or three times they actually don't come in my room. They'll call out my name but i won't budge. I'll just stay here, on the floor, spaced out.

My Navy blue lace summer dress lays around me and I play with the hems of my dress as I look to the side finally taking my gaze away from the ceiling. I look out the window and all I see is the sky going from blue to gray like some tornado is going to happen. Then the rain came pouring down like no tomorrow. The drops will come down the window like if they are racing.

I sat up from the floor and went to sit on the window seat just looking out the window with my knees pulled up to my chest. I hugged myself and lay my head down looking out the window. The lighting didn't even scare me and it usually does. How did a nice day out turn into this Stormy night? i can see the cars passing by trying to go to their home and I also see the people running into their home. But there this one couple out side who's having fun in the rain, dancing and what not.

My room light flicker and I looked around and I can tell the power about to go off due to the weather.

That's how it happened a couple seconds later the power went out. I grabbed my phone from the window seal and turn on my flash light.

I hate feeling like This, like if everything around me is going slow motion, that just one fast movement can ruin something special.

A honk from outside snap me back to reality and I looked out the window to see a black car with their head lights on. The person steps out and looks at my window. I open the window and stick my head out.

It was Ethan.

"What are you doing Dolan?!" I half yelled through the loud thunder.

"Are you actually thinking of leaving me?!" He yells back and my eyes widen. How did he know? I only told Grayson, unless he told him because he didn't show up it was Ethan. I close the window and got up and ran out the room and down the hall to the stairs and out the front door to see him already at the door soak and wet from the rain. Little water would drop from his hair to his face. He would just look at me like he always does. With hope of not losing me but also fear.

"Please don't" He says in a low voice that actually broke Me little by little. The whole Street was out of power so the only light was his car head lights. I just look down as my eyes started to burn.

I know I said I'll be with him through every step but that's because I believe it wasn't his child but hearing the news would break you like if you fell off the bike the first day you took off your training wheels.

He places a hand under my chin and lifts my head up so my eyes can meet with his. He cups both of my cheeks as he gets closer to me. He wipes under my eyes.

"Don't cry, I know this is hard but you can do this" he says and I sniff and shake my head no." Please don't shake your head no " he says and places a hand on my hip while the other is still under my chin.

"Ethan your going to have a family, even though you don't like the mother but the more you spend time with them when the baby born you'll feel more connected to them and you'll forget about me and start having feeling for lyi--" I was cut off by him place a kiss on my lips.

The kisses that I would miss and the hugs and every little thing he does that I love. But I have to protect myself from getting hurt, even though he would deny that it would happen, I know it would, it always does.

I pull away and look down at my feet as he sighs. I look back up at him and he looks sad and mad at himself.

"I can't" was all I said before backing away from him and going back in the house and closing the door. I press my back against the door as I hear him say my name then curse under his breath and hit the door with  his palms. I slide down to the floor and place my hand over my mouth while sobbing.