The Journey to Writing a Successful Story: a tip book

Words to Replace Said?

There's been a lot of talk about what to use instead of "said." And that you should never use it too often or whatnot.

Using "said" is not a bad thing. Don't avoid it. You may feel like you're overusing it, but ask yourself if you actually are.

Using multiple dialogue tags can actually make the writing choppy and feel awkward, as if the writer is trying to force it.

But here's the thing, does everyone whisper? Mumble? Yell? No. Not everyone has a tone when they're just randomly talking like a normal person. When they have to be quiet, they'll whisper. When they don't want the other person to hear them, they may mumble. When they're angry or irritated or frustrated, they may yell. But "said," is very common.

Don't believe me? Read published stories. Just about every single author out there uses "said" a lot. Sometimes, when they feel as though it's relevant or rather, needed, they may add in a few synonyms like "commented," "added," "announced," "mentioned," "stated," "retorted," "replied," "remarked," "answered," "responded," and so on. Count them. In multiple books, count how many times they say it in a chapter. How many times did they use synonyms for "said"? How many times did they say "said"?

You don't need to avoid the word like it's a disease waiting to contaminate the room as if "said" is contagious. It's not. It's quite normal - and common, may I add - to use the word.

But do look back at your own work. In every dialogued area, do you use a dialogue tag such as what has been mentioned above with yelling, whispering, and so on? If you find yourself doing so most of the way, try to avoid dialogue tags sometimes. You can just leave it as just a paragraph of the dialogue, or stop the sentence and use detail to describe the scene, how the character feels, and so on.

Here's an example:

"You could have gotten us in trouble!" he continued to pester me. "I don't know what would've happened, but you could've been expelled from school, not to mention she probably ratted you out!" His voice was too deep and loud that even I was scared of him. It was a whole new person whom sat right next to me. Elyes was only like that when he was angry, which I only saw once in a blue moon.

I couldn't bare being in the car with him, shouting at me like that. He was tearing me apart; ripping me to shreds like he was putting me in a paper shredder. "I don't need you to be my consciences!" I spat at him, anger rising from the grave, like it had been dead for years. After what happened, I felt more angrier than I ever had been in my life. Paige had finally dug deep down into my skin and took out my insides as if I was just a toy, a mannequin to her. She deserved every punch and kick I threw at her. She deserved to rot and feel the pain because what nuisance she felt was the pain I felt whenever she tormented me. I was a punching bag to her, and at the parking lot, she was my punching bag.

"Of course you don't, Aly. You want to be independent and stubborn . . ."

"And what's so bad about that?" It was silent when he drove along the curb and stopped in front of my one-story house. My tears began to rise from the edges of my eyes and I tried my best to keep them inside. "I finally stood up for myself. I didn't need you or Jake. I did it. Why does it make you so angry that I did it?" I said calmly.

He breathed, taking in a lot of air. In a low, but stern voice, he answered, "I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself. But your timing sucked."

I didn't say a thing. In fact, I looked over the seat and found Jake playing with his fingers, looking down to his old and worn out shoes. "And what do you have to say?" My eyebrow rose on my forehead.

His head went up and his eyes stared into mine. He shrugged. "I'm not in this."