Forty.

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EDITED.

I was back home. Away from all the craziness and heartbreak.

Back to the same old life. Back to the times when I thought nothing can bring me down. Back to the times when I thought that nobody can hurt me. Back to the times when I thought I was strong enough to withstand it all.

I missed those times.

But that was not why I left.

This is not about Karen.

The day when I was admitted out of the hospital, Karen came to bring me home, back to Tyler's place. I walked straight to my room and packed everything that was mine into my luggage and left the place.

Never did I once did I look back. I just walked away. I didn't know what was running through my mind at that point in time. Maybe it was what Karen said, maybe it was my own selfish thoughts. Maybe I was just too afraid.

I just wanted to run away and never look back. I know what I did was very selfish of me. I should have fight for it, but I had no choice and I didn't have the strength to, so I chose the easier path, leaving.

Besides, I just received my college application, I got accepted into Yale and I have to leave in two weeks time. Since I had the chance, I grabbed it. It would be the perfect time to leave.

I think leaving now probably hurts less, for him and for me. I didn't want to wait, the longer I stay, the more it is going to hurt the both of us.

But trust me, it hurts me as much as it might hurt him.

I have been busy occupying myself with work so I can put my mind off Tyler. And I have Chelsea there with me to cheer me up, she will always be there whenever I need her.

Although Tyler did come to my house to find me for a couple of times, I always told Nathan to tell him I'm not home. Or when he came to find me at my working place, I would hide in the kitchen at the back. And when he called me or texted me, I would ignore them.

I know, I feel heartless, so mean, so selfish. But what I did was for the best.

I'm merely helping Tyler to get over me and forget about me because we were just not meant to be. Yes, of course, we were meant to cross paths. But only that, crossing is not equivalent to staying, so one day I will have to leave him. And that day when I left was the day.
→→→→→

"Alexandra? Alexandra? Alexandra!"

I jolted back to reality as Chelsea's voice reached me.

"I'm sorry. Is there something you need?" I asked as I shot her a sheepish smile.

"No, but the customer in front of you needs something," she replied as she raised an eyebrow at me.

I whipped my head around to see a lady in her mid-thirties standing right before me, clad in a simple shirt and shorts.

"Oh hi, I'm sorry, I was just a little distracted..." I mumbled. "How may I help you?" I asked as I plastered a smile across my face.

"Oh it's okay darling, I would like some Italian meatballs and one plate of Aglio Olio."

"Sure," I said as I typed away on the cash register furiously. "That will be $25.80." She handed me $50 and I gave her the change. "Your food will be here right away," I said as she gave me a polite smile before she walked away.

"One plate of meatballs and one Aglio Olio!" I yelled into the back kitchen while Chelsea shot me a thumbs up. I turned around and went back to serving the next customer.

Finally, the crowd was gone and we were on our break. I stared at the people passing by the window. My mind was a blank.

"Alexandra?"

"Yeah?" I asked as I turned to look at Chelsea, her eyes filled with concern.

"Are you okay? You seem pretty spaced out lately. You just can't seem to concentrate on anything. Wanna tell me what's going on inside that head of yours?" 

"Well..." I trailed off as I kept my eyes downcasted, playing with the hem of my shirt.

"Alexandra, you can talk to me. But if you don't feel comfortable talking about it, it's fine, just tell me okay?" She said as she placed her hand on my shoulder gently, giving me a reassuring look.

"I don't know where to start to be honest. There are so many things going on in my life right now. I'm so fucked up. I don't know if what I'm doing is the right thing or not. I don't know if I'm being too selfish for my own good. I'm devastated, Chelsea."

"Well, wanna tell me what is it that you have done?" She asked kindly, her blue eyes boring into mine.

"It's a pretty long story, do you think you are up for it?"

"Well, of course. Anything for my friend. Besides, we still have 30 minutes before the end of our lunch break," she said as she checked the time on her phone and gave me a smile as her eyes met mine.

"You know how I used to work as a body guard for Tyler?"

"Yeah," she drawled.

"Well, I kind of dated him a few months back and many things happened during that short period of time."

I definitely didn't miss the look of shock on Chelsea's face when I mentioned that I dated Tyler but I continued anyway.

"For starters, I was stabbed in the stomach."

"Oh my gosh!" Chelsea exclaimed as her hands flew to her mouth. "Are you alright? Why didn't you tell me? I would have done all the chores."

"Chels, it's okay. I'm fine now," I said as I gave her a reassuring smile. "Don't want boss firing me because I am slacking too much huh?" I joked just to lighten up the mood a little.

"Alright, you are right though," she said as she chuckled softly. "Anyway, you were saying?"

"Oh right. So I was admitted into the hospital. And I got stabbed because I saved Karen, which is Tyler's mum. But do you know how she thanked me?" I said with a scoff. "She told me to leave Tyler. To break up with him. Because 'we are not on the same level'. She said it would be the best for him if I leave him. Tyler and I just weren't meant to be I guess," I said sadly, tears forming at the brim of my eyes as the happy memories of being with Tyler flashed though my mind like a fast forward movie.

"Alexandra, please don't cry. If you cry, you will make me cry too," she mumbled as she placed her hand on my shoulder and looked at me with teary eyes. I gave her a sad smile in response.

"I will try not to," I mumbled as I chuckled softly, wiping any trail of tears away.

"Come on, let's finish what you need to say alright? You can't bottle up everything because then one day you will explode. It's better you say it now," she advised as she gave me a demure smile.

"Alright. So Karen came to fetch me when I got admitted out of the hospital. I'm pretty sure Tyler came later, so he pretty much went crazy when he didn't see me there because I did have many missed calls from him. Anyway, I went to Tyler's place and packed up all my things and left the place. I don't think I'm ever going back again. It's probably for the best, just like what Karen said."

Chelsea looked at me, her eyes filled with sympathy. She reached out and gave my hand a little squeeze.

"Tell me, Chelsea, am I doing the right thing?"

A/N:
So what do you think? Do you think that Alexandra is doing the right thing?

Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter and helped you to understand why Alexandra left :) If you like this chapter, don't forget to vote, comment and fan!

Much love,
Rachel xx

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