Whatever It Takes

Chapter- Thirteen

I hid from Oliver. I'll tell the truth, I honestly wanted to kiss him but he told me it was just in the moment. I know that he was done with football for the year, he had more time than ever to be with me. But of course that doesn't go as planned. I didn't know what to do with myself around him. Maybe I need a boyfriend. If I did that then I'd be using the poor boy to get over Oliver. I've been thinking about telling him how I really feel.

"What's wrong with you?" Ellen asked from her seat.

"Nothing, I'm just zoning out. I hate this class." I said as I turned my attention to the teacher who was eyeing us. I started writing down some notes and then drifted to doodling. I couldn't pay attention. All I can think about is his lips. We got so freaking close and then it was over just like that. I want him, no I need him to be near me. It doesn't matter if we don't talk I just love his presence. I feel so lonely in a room full of people including a good friend. He makes me smile, he know how to cheer me up when one of my favorite drama show character gets hurt, He's been there for everything. He means the world to me.

"Welcome Mr. Grey. Have a seat please." My english teacher said. My head snapped to look at this 'new' student. My eyes widened and I turned back and hid myself by covering my face. Terror stretched through me and it was not breaking anytime soon. Five minutes later the bell rang and I made my way to my locker. I shoved my books in and ran to Oliver's.

"Oliver, I need you." I spoke a few feet away from him. I grabbed his hand and quickly found an empty classroom.

"I'm not going to kiss you." He said before I turned around. I blinked a few times.

"What makes you think I was going to kiss you." I stated through a panicky voice.

"I didn't bring you here to do that. He's back, Ryan is back." I wheezed out. As if on cue an anxiety attack sprang into action.

"Daniella, breathe. Breathe god dammit." Oliver said as he held me and rubbed my back to soothe me.

"Why is he back? I can't go back out there." I cried harder and choked for air.

"I know it's hard. I'll talk to you after school, alright? I'll bring over a tub of ice cream." He said and wiped my tears. I nodded slowly and then we went our separate ways. I had to stop in the bathroom to fix myself up. I stood in the mirror and reapplied concealer.

"Do you want help?" I turned to see Veronica.

"Um, sure." I said. She took out her makeup and bag and helped me.

"You know, I was always jealous that you and Oliver hung out so much. But I see why he likes you." She said as she patted on some pounder.

"Really? I know we hate each other but can we please get over that and call it a truce?" I asked.

"I'd be glad to. I know we have to gain each other's trust some day. I'll see you around." she said and left the bathroom.

Did we really just do that? The Queen Bee has fallen from her hive. I'm quite surprised to hear that from her. I didn't think she would agree. I stopped blankly standing in the bathroom and got back to class.

***

I plopped onto the couch with a fuzzy blanket and TV remote. I clicked the power button a surfed the channels until I started a rerun of One Tree Hill. Once I heard the front door open, I knew Oliver was here.

"I didn't forget." He said.

"You said you would be here after school. It's going on ten o'clock." I said.

"Something came up." He shrugged and placed the ice cream in my hands with a metal spoon. I happily dug in with him even though I was a little upset.

"Before we talk about Ryan, I want to talk about us." I stated.

"Everything is fine with us." He said and stuck his spoon in again.

"No it's not. Open your eyes and tell me you don't see us falling apart." I said and his mouth snapped close.

"From my perspective, I barely see you. You tell me these lies that something came up. I know why you are avoiding me like I've been avoiding you." I told him.

."When you avoid me, I avoid myself." He said with sad eyes.

"I don't understand how someone can deeply want something and then run from it." I said.

"Love does that sort of stuff." He said.

"So is this love?" I asked pausing.

"Because I'm still falling." I said softly.

"Is that how you feel?" He asked making me narrow my eyes at him.

"Well, yes." I said.

"Because I fell in love years ago." He said feeding me ice cream.

"I'm such an idiot. No, I'm a blind idiot." I said looking at him.

"I was too. I know you had your first kiss taken from you but I'll be your last. I'm done hiding it Daniella. I can't take it hiding the way I feel. I'm sorry for that random make-out session at the hotel. I needed you and it cleared my head, but then I knew I messed up when I left you." He apologized.

"As much as I want to kiss you right now, I can't." He let out.

"Why? Nothing is stopping you." I said.

"Actually yes there is. I, I have a girlfriend." He said. I licked my frozen lips.

"Why'd you tell me these things then?" I asked.

"I don't know." He said.

"I'm happy for you." I said suddenly. He looked taken back.

"Thanks." He mumbled and then his phone went off.

"Sorry, I have to go." He said and left me in my family room with an empty ice cream container. I feel fat now. I sat there absent minded. Why is my world messed up? I shook my head in disappointment.

I'd kill to have another life. I hope I reincarnate into a cat when I decided to die. I threw away the container and washed the spoons.

"Hey, I thought you headed to bed earlier." My mom said walking in from the garage.

"No, I was just sitting in my room waiting for Oliver that's all." I told her.

"I'm glad to see you two talking. I have a late shift tomorrow so I won't be home to make dinner." She said and I nodded.

"I think I'm going to head up now." I said and went up to my room. I sat on the edge of my bed. I had no idea what I was going to do. Ellen is barely around because she is always with Elliot and now that Oliver has a girlfriend, I'm out of the picture. I now have to dodge ryan by myself and basically shut everyone out. I can't wait for my first year of college, I need to get away from this town.