Once a cheater, always a cheater

36. Pinky promise

Emma's POV:

I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't do anything without not thinking about Harry. I haven't felt good this whole day. I've been puking, can't stand normally on my legs, got such a bad head ache. But I can't tell Harry, he's gonna worry about me and I don't want him to worry about me. He got a lot on his mind.

But why did I call him then? If I don't want him to know, why did I call him.
To hear his voice. Hear him, I needed to hear him.

"There is nothing, I mean it, Harry." I tell him again over the phone "I shouldn't have called" I mumble the last part

"No no no! I'm happy you've called! I actual just wanted to call you, my love. Cuz I got great news!" He sounds happy, I don't wanna ruin that happiness by telling that I haven't felt good. I just have to suck it up and be happy for whatever news he's gonna tell me.

"My dad remembers me! Love, my dad remembers me!!" He almost yells into my ear. I hear his laugh. How happy he is. I instantly get happy myself.

"That's such good news! I'm so happy for you, Harry!" Just when I said it, it feels like in need to throw up.

Not now! Please not now!

"Emma? Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fi-" I throw my phone on the bed and run towards the bathroom, but halfway through my legs gave out and I fall on the ground. Trying to catch myself and throwing up.
I hear Harry on the background screaming.

I shouldn't have called.
                                            ~•~

"Okay, you got me... I'm not fine" Harry and I FaceTimed the minute he was in his hotel room.

When I finally stopped puking I couldn't stand for some time. So I just laid there, in my own gross puke until I could stand again. Harry kept screaming into the phone while he rushed towards his hotel room to FaceTime me. When I could finally stand again I first told Harry that I was alright. I wasn't really alright, but I stopped puking and I could stand again. Then I changed clothes and cleaned everything up.

"Emma..." I can see and hear the disappointment and worry. It breaks me. I know I shouldn't have lied but I just didn't want to worry him. He already got so much on his mind.

"I'm sorry, I- I just didn't wanted to worry you" don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.

"I know, love, but please, the next time, just tell me"  he gives me a small smile. I nod.

"Okay, my little star, please tell me now. What's wrong? What exactly happened?"

"I-I... I just don't feel well"

"There's more, I know there's more."

"Why must there always be more? Huh!?" I snap at him "What if there isn't more?! Can't I just don't feel well? Isn't that enough?" I feel tears prick in my eyes "isn't it enough? Well? Answer me then!"

"I-I, Emma, I didn't ment it like that. Emma, love, I'm sorry. But..."

deep down I know I should just except his apology, I know he didn't ment it like that,  and there is more, but for some reason I can't stop, like everything just comes out. Just like that

"Stop it! I don't wanna hear your but! I'm just so sick of this. All of this! Everything! Everybody! Why must there always be more? with me there must always be more! Always! Why?" I feel hot tears run down my cheek as I break down "I just want everything to stop! I just want to sleep! I- I just want to sleep" I can't look at Harry, he probably looks at me like I'm some baby that needs to be pitied.