Where the Unknown Lie

Chapter 58 Soft Spoken

"I'm here," Levi said, his voice steady and reassuring, "And I'm not going anywhere."

The sense of relief that washed over me as the sentence he spoke reached my ears was almost incomprehensible.

For the first time in what felt like an eternity, I allowed myself to relax in his embrace.

I felt so weak clinging to him as if my life depended on it, that in my weakest moment, I sought him out. That fear caused me to go to him, to act on impulse and urge, an urge I've been trying to suppress.

It was an odd thought for someone like me, an assassin, one so well known had the fear of being left alone. One of the biggest fears I had had was being left. And it was belittling to admit this.

I faced death and danger almost every day, physical pain of all calibres I felt on a daily basis yet the fear that had me shaken to my core, crying in Levi's arms was the fear of being left alone.

Solitude was something I had always wished for but to forever be in solitude was something no one would ever wish, no matter how much they acted as if they wanted it. Being who I am, personality and reputation-wise, I was prone to being pushed into solitude forever.

Eternity alone.

What a fucking pathetic fear, yet it is that which had been shaking and breaking in Levi's arms, begging for him not to leave me alone.

I didn't know quite how long Levi held me as I clung to him, searching for something to anchor myself onto so I couldn't break as vigorously as that dream would usually cause me to.

Though, I couldn't say I cared as to how long he had been. It would only cause me to wince and beat myself up for allowing myself to break in front of him. The same man who wouldn't let me leave, to go back to who I was.

If you really looked hard at this situation, you could say Levi was the cause of all my problems. Maybe cutting him off would fix everything.

It'll only make it worse. I thought to myself as my heavy breathing slowed to match the rhythm his heart was beating, which was, to be fair, abnormally fast. Cutting him off now will only cause more issues and I know it.

My mind was still a mess but I decided it was enough and relaxed my grip. I was too weak to let go of him, no matter how much I wished I would release my hold on the boy, my heart seemed to want nothing more than to stay in his embrace.

"Feeling better?" Levi asked, breaking the silence with an oddly soft voice. A voice I wouldn't have expected anyone to be able to use with me. Even Alec hadn't been able to speak to me as softly as Levi did now, or maybe it was because of the fact Levi never spoke like this that made it seem so soft and reassuring.

My voice cracked as I spoke, "I'm fine." I said, wanting to sound more confident and stable than I did. "Thanks..." I murmured, finally giving up as I allowed my voice to drop to a whisper, and I took a step back moving away from Levi despite how much I wished to stay in his arms.

Weak. I told myself, That is a weak thought. I said, practically bullying myself to stop myself from reaching towards him again, refraining from taking him within my grasp again.

I found that I couldn't bring my gaze up, to look at his face. I found my eyes trailing around his chest, his neck, refusing to ascend any higher to look at his face.

"You're fine?" Levi asked, his tone not raising in pitch. I found myself nodding as my eyes trailed along his arms, now to his hands which were still placed around my waist.

Heat rose to my face as I realised this, as I realised how close I was to him. Not to mention how shit I must look, bedhead and red, puffy eyes. I must've shown up to his room pretty late too, considering I never saw anyone else in the halls on my way over here.