Where the Unknown Lie

Chapter 25 The Cabin

[Naomi POV] 

"Ugh!" I yelp as I landed on my ass once again. 

"You need your feet wider apart."

"Of course I do, otherwise I wouldn't be on my ass," I mumble to myself while getting up off the ground and glaring up at the man that stood before me.

"Don't give me that look!" He laughed, "I'm just teaching you!"

"Very poorly, Dad," I mutter. 

"C'mon! It's not that bad... is it?" He grins at me, he looked much like Aiden and me. Same brunette hair, same coloured highlights. The dazzling smile we would use to get our way. The only 2 things that separated him and I were his pale-green eyes and the wandering look they had to them.

I know who we are. Who he is- was. The blood that stains his hands, yet I loved him. Despite the tough love he showed us, which was more, tough than love. Despite all the things he showed me... I loved them, I loved how I knew how to kill someone with my bare hands, torture methods, all of it. When I really shouldn't.

I even envied my Father. Envied the way he moved, the way he always knew what to say or how to say it. Or the simple fact that he could switch his emotions off. That intrigued me. I even wanted to know how he did it, how he managed to keep a cool head but look as if he was on fire. 

I wanted that. I wanted to know how he let his eyes dance but know exactly what I was doing even if he wasn't looking at me. I wanted to know.

I wanted it.

I wanted it so badly that it tore apart my humanity. I wanted it so badly that I ended up exactly like him. Somehow worse.

What differed between him and me now? 

The fact that he had Mother. The person that would always stay at his side, no matter what he did. Mother knew everything about him and still stayed. She was his buffer.

That is what differs us now. 

I had someone yet they ran. My buffer ran.

That and the fact that I have a darker stain on my hands than him. The darker the stain, the blunter and blander you become. 

He told me, "Don't spill too much, it will flood, my Amare. What emotions come with what you spill, you bury. Don't bury too much, Amare, soon you are going to be standing on a minefield of emotions. You won't know what will set you off next."

-----

"Naomi?" Mikasa repeated for the 4th time.

"What?" I moan, looking up at where she was standing beside a woodcutters block, axe in hand.

"Are you going to help?" She glares down at where I lay on the grass. 

Grey eyes bore into me, they had a slight look of fear hidden behind the cold act she puts up. I mentally take note of that, it wasn't there before, she normally had a suspicious glint, but now that on top of the fear. It was getting weird.  

I shrug, "Do you really want me to help? I only came so I could get out of cleaning." 

"Omi," Historia started, I gazed at her. Her smiling eyes were depleted to ashes of grim thoughts. "Please help Mikasa, she's injured."

I roll my eyes and get up from my place on the ground. "That's her fault for getting grabbed by a titan," I mumbled, scrunching up my nose.

I was wearing a dress again. I did not want to be wearing a dress again. I didn't want to be stuck in the middle of nowhere with Eren and his little band of followers, I don't want to be here forcing myself to keep calm and stick around, I wanted to be back at the guild. The loud halls and people arguing, steel and metal flashing as people got into fights. A free drink from Ollie in my hand while I laugh at the newbies.