'I want to come with you.' I said.
I was now in the parking lot with Pedri, as he had a flight to catch.
He grabbed my hands, rubbing his thumbs against them. 'The final is almost there and then you can come home.' he smiled. 'You got this.'
'No, I don't...' I shook my head.
'I'll see you at home, okay?'
'Thank you.' I said softly.
'Come here.' he said and pulled me into a hug.
After a few moments of hugging eachother he jumped into the car and parted ways with me.
Once again, I burst into tears, trying my hardest to hold myself up.
All I wanted to do was go home. Forget this ever happened. Forget Spain lost. Forget Brazil lost. Go back in time and watch all this from the comfort of my own home.
I took a deep breath and headed back to where Luca was waiting for me. The day wasn't over yet and we had to head out to the training centre to meet with Argentina's national team.
***
I was heartbroken and I couldn't stop crying.
The whole car ride I was sobbing while Luca kept on trying to calm down.
'Irina, you can miss this one.' Luca said as we got out the car. 'You don't have to—'
'Stop talking.' I said sternly, cutting him off. 'I just need you to stop talking.'
He wasn't saying anything, just looking at me with sympathetic eyes.
'I just need 5 minutes.' I said through my teeth. 'Five fucking minutes without you saying anything. Five minutes.' my voice cracked.
He did just as I told him and walked away. He stopped by the entrance and pretended he was busy reading the flyers on the wall.
I sat down on the curb, closing my eyes and letting my head go blank. I tried to think about something happy, something that will make me stop crying, something that will just fill this sadness that took over me.
But nothing was working.
After 5 minutes I stood up and straightened myself, taking a deep breath. My tears weren't flooding my face anymore and I was walking towards Luca.
'Let's go.' I said and walked through the doors, stopping as soon as we entered the building.
Luca didn't question me at all, just stopped with me.
'I can't.' I said quietly looking at him. 'I can't.' I burst into tears once again.
He stepped closer to me and wrapped his arms around me.
'I don't think I'll be able to take it if Argentina loses.' I said through sobs. 'I just can't.'
'Of course you can.' Luca said softly, moving away from the hug to look at me. 'You're Irina. You're one hell of a woman and you have been through much worse things.'
'You don't understand...'
'Argentina won't lose.' he said sternly. 'They won't. And after this game, you're free to lock yourself in the room and drown in your own tears.' he smiled. 'And I'll be right there.'
After a few moments of trying to calm myself down we walked towards the players.
I couldn't speak and most certainly couldn't look at them. My eyes were fixated on the floor, away from them.
