Carry On My Wayward Son

(16)

I put my legs as close as i can to my chest. It has been 28 hours since Deans death. He has been on our bed for 24 of those hours. Cas has been down. Sammy comes into our room every thirty minutes. I stare at him and let tears fall down my face.

"Why?" I whisper to myself. I then feel and kick in my stomach. I look down at my belly. I have been getting bigger and bigger every day. Now Dean wont be able to see his children.

I stand up and go sit down next to him. I put my hand on his and start to cry.

"I love you Dean. I remember the first day I met you. I was what 10? You were I think 14. I remember how you watched Sammy's every move. How your green eyes shined when he showed you a bug he found. You know you were also my first kiss. Remember that night when we got drunk for the first time? I was like 15 and you were 18 about to turn 19. We walked away from Sammy who was sleeping in that old car. Then you grabbed my face and kissed me. I remember being so scared but at the same time being so safe. You were my first everything Dean. I love you." I whisper letting tears fall down my face.

I walk out of the room to see Crowley and Sam talking. Crowley steps way from me when Sam gives me a hug.

"Don't worry Im not going to kill you. Dont have the energy. Most likely never will." I say picking up my purse and keys. "Im going to go to a hotel."

-5 hours later-

I haven't slept. I just stare at the bed spread. I study all the patterns when I get a call. I look at my phone and see it was Sam.

"Sam?" I croak.

"Dean, he's gone. I left for a second to get something out of the car and him and Crowley are gone." he says panicking.

I hang up and jog to my car and speed to my apartment. I walk up the stairs and see sammy reading a note.

"What is that?" I say huffing.

"Read it." he says hanging it to me.

'Find someone new.
Let me go.
-D'

I fall to my new and go into a fetal position. I cry for years of sadness without him. I cry for the year of happiness with him. Sam is trying to talk to me but all I hear is a mumble.

I feel him pick me up and walk down the stairs. He puts me in the car and buckles me in and starts driving. We drive for what feels like hours. We stop at this building in a hill.

"What is this?" I whisper.

"The Man of Letters headquarters. Dean and I found this awhile back." he says in return. "Oh charlie is here. She has been dying to meet you. But Dean didn't want that." he says.

He gets out and I follow him. We walk up the stairs and go through the door. We walk into a huge library. Then I see a short Red head looking over a book.

"Hiya Sammy, oh my gosh." she says running up to me with a big hug. "Dean will not stop talking about you. I feel like I already know you." she says and then speaking to my belly with my children in there. "How are you little guy? Aunt Charlie here." she smiles.

"You hungry?" He asks us.

"No just tired." i say.

"Wheres dean?" She asks.

We both look at her. I start to cry and Sam looks away trying to not cry.

"He ran off, Or a demon is in his meat suit." he says.

"Well i think I cracked the code. So get him." she says.

"Im on it." he says.

Charlie shows me a room. I walk in and look around.

"This is Deans room. He stays in here when they go on hunts and stuff." she says as i look at his weapons. I then see a small black box. I open it and gasp. A small ring sits in it.

"Oh shit you weren't supposed to see that." she says.

"Do you know when?" I ask her.

She laughs to herself. "Yea, when you guys had your kid." she smiles.

"Kids." I correct her.

"Kids? As in twins?" She asks.

"Yeah, found out the first doc appointment." I whisper sitting on his bed.

"We will find him." she promises.

"I hope."