Forbidden

Chapter twenty-four

Songs for the chapter: Zack Knight-Dheere(this helped me write the chappie, and it's a beautiful song)
Taylor Swift-Treacherous

Gentle breaths fell from his lips heating my neck, sometimes purring and this is the only time I found peace. I've managed to get some sleep, but having Zayn breath on my neck and lay on me had sure made it difficult. It was early in the morning and I keep thinking about what he said, how he indirectly told me that those drugs were something that helped him, and maybe made him forget about things he expirienced. Still I was trying to push him away, especially since he's laying between my thighs his bare muscled chest on mine, our breathing pattern was the same. I can't help but feel so vulnerable and humiliated, I even smell like him.

When he shifts I gasp because our mid sections are brushing, dangerously close now and I feel his not so subtle bulge since he was only in his white boxers.

"Wake up.." I whisper while shaking him by his shoulders while I'm trembling lightly."Zayn wake up." I say louder. He groaned on my neck.

"Fuck.." A low hiss left his mouth and he shifts again accidently, or maybe not, grinding to me. Tears prickle on my eyes ready to flow.

"Stop." I shout fuming my whole body tingling and he tensed, his beard grazing my throat because he tried to wake himself up while nuzzling to my neck then sighed heavily while he luckily leans on his elbows and shifts so his legs have my right leg between them.

Locking my chin between his fingers and thumb he tilts my head up while he nears me until I feel his exhilarated breath is on me. Slowly I look up to his puffy eyes, dishelved hair and he notices my scared and flushed face, while his black flecked eyes take my expression in, frowning deeply. Unfailingly I see sadness in his eyes and I didn't like it at all.

"Shh, don't even think about it." he murmured when my lip quivered ready to weep still holding me close now leaning his chin on my chest.

"I can't." I murmur about to cry.

"You talk in your sleep did you know?" he rasped with his deep groggy morning voice trying to distract me and my lips part."And you have nightmares. Unless I touch you they won't go away." he softly said and diverted his eyes to me, pupils blown out. I think he was still sleepy and that's why he tries to calm me down. Because wasn't he the one who said that he loves to see me cry?

"Wh-What?" I finally asked shyly while stuttering and looked away from his stare. He had started to rub my left thigh with his hand reasuringly up and down, squeezing from time to time.

"You do. Now go back to sleep." he mumbled laying his head back to my chest and continued to feel my thigh by running it up and down, never stopping the calming manner. His hand was big and warm and his thumb was sweeping over my skin in a constant motion. I didn't mind. Admittely I liked it more than I should have.

+

I woke up on the comfy bed and felt well rested, not sweaty or like a weigh is laying on me. With caution I look to the side and let a breath out when Zayn wasn't there. I stood up just sitting on the bed before flopping down again, now noticing a piece of paper on the night stand.

*I've got some things to attend and will be back soon. If you don't try to escape I'll let you stay home alone more often bambi x.* he had scribbled down in his artsy hand writing.

I felt delightened to be honest because I don't think I would bear seeing him this early.. or ever. But why had he written home in it as if this was my real home?

I stand up and feel myself sway and grip the nightstand, my head was pounding. Taking quick breaths to free my mental exhaustion a bit I look around the trashed room and decide to clean it.