10 | lost to the darkness

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The garden was my solace

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The garden was my solace.

The beauty of it never fails to amaze me each time I came here. It didn't matter that I came here every single day. The warm feeling that brightened my whole heart with amazement never faltered.

My giddy ten years self always saw something new. Whatever it was a butterfly, bees, the color of the flowers, and new plants that were newly grown.

The smell of it was pure heaven.

The smell of flowers to be precise.

I sat on a red and white striped picnic blanket spread out on the grass in the garden which was occupying the whole backyard that I'd built with my mother's help. The space of the blanket was full of different kinds of food. Sandwiches, grapes, cheese, jerky, cake and so many more. So much of it that I knew I wouldn't even eat less than half of it. But the sight of it made me smug especially when I made all of it by myself.

Pumpkin, my three years old orange cat, was curled up on my lap. She purred while I stroked her soft thick fur.

I've invited Mother to come out and join me. She promised she would come out and join me in fifteen minutes to complete washing the dishes and the mess I'd made while preparing the food. I'd thanked her and ran out here to set everything up.

She should be here a few minutes ago but I thought nothing of it. Mother could be a knack sometimes, spacing out and losing track of the time in the process.

BANG!

A hiss of pain escaped me as Pumpkin ran away from my lap, her claws cutting a few lines on my thigh in the process. I didn't blame her. I would have done the same thing if I was a four-legged creature. She disappeared into the garden and I never saw her again.

Another gunshot echoed from the house and I trembled. I was only ten. I was a kid. I didn't know what to do.

Mother always told me to run but my feet wouldn't comply with me. My brain was screaming at me to run but it was if my body disconnected and was frozen with terror.

A bloodcurdling scream sounded like my mother and it finally got me to move, not to run away but to run toward the sound. My mother was in danger and I didn't think about the risk it would put me into.

A stupid decision I made changed my whole life forever.

Stepping into that house was the biggest mistake I made in my life.

Little did I know then I wouldn't see a garden let alone a single flower for the next few years of my life.

If only I knew I would spend the next four years in the darkness.

P E R D I T A

I knew something was different before I opened my eyes.

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