-Chapter Sixty One

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This is a double update so be sure to read Chapter Sixty before you read Chapter Sixty One. Also read the message at the end of Chapter Sixty. Enjoy!

Justin and I sat down eating dinner in silence. I could tell from how his shoulder was tensed that he wasn't looking forward to us talking.

I liked how things were between us now too but we can't not deal with the problems that almost deal to our fatal ending. We need to deal with the matters head on so they no longer have the power to break us apart.

After more silence lingered around us I sighed and pushed my plate away. Justin's eyes followed my movements. "You need to eat, Candy." He said to me.

"I'll finish my Mac and cheese once we're done talking." I said leaving no room for arguments. He sighed and opened his mouth to speak:

"I'm sorry Candy." He started.

"Why?" I asked him, "why did you do it?" The question has been burning my mind for so long. Yes, I have forgiven Justin but I was still curious. I still needed answers.

"I don't know. I know it sounds like crap but I really don't. I have no reason, no excuse for what I did. Hailey was simply there and made a move on me but there is no reason to why I didn't stop her. I just didn't. But I promise it never went beyond the kiss you saw, my love, you have to believe me." He pleaded.

"I believe y-you." I chocked back my tears. I might have forgiven him but forgetting is a whole different story. I feel like someone stabbed me in the chest everytime I have a flashback to that awful night.

"So you don't have feelings for her or anything?" I asked. I knew the answer but I had to be certain.

"No, my love. My heart belongs to you and only you." He replied and I nodded.

"I'm sorry too." I apologized and he shifted his seat closer to mine.

"There is no need to apologize, my love. I'm the one at fault."

I shook my head.

"I–I wasn't completely honest with you. I said I was n-never in love with any of my exes while I knew that I might have been. I was in denial a-and hurt because I was r-rejected. I lived in fear that you would do the same when all you had done was love me like I've never been loved before. I unknowingly kept apart of me to myself and never shared it with you because I was scared  of getting hurt. And when I did get hurt I did what I always do. I ran away. I knew that it was different with you, I knew I was in too deep but I still fled. Fear took over like it always did and I did nothing to fight or stop it. I got mad at myself for not hating you. I even stopped myself from feeling nothing altogether so I could escape the way I was feeling but it never worked. I didn't realize that I was comparing you to all my other exes who had done me wrong. I ignored all the efforts you put in when you asked for my forgiveness because I classified you as one if them. I hadn't realized that not only was I driven by fear but I was also punishing you for the wrongs that other people made because you were the first one to try and fix it instead of move on like they all did. When you gave me the divorce papers I smiled but later on I was sad because me depriving myself of what I wanted, of what I needed made me smile. Playing it safe made me smile. It was all sickening. I thought I was happy but the truth is I was just comfortable."

"I'm so sorry." I hung my head down. I felt him put my hand in his. He put a finger under my chin and elevated me so I looked him in the eye.

"I love you Candy. I don't care about what lies you've told me in the past, all that matters is us now. All that matters is the chance that you have given us to make things right, baby. All that matters is that through the trials and tribulations in the end we still chose us. Thank you for giving me a second chance, for giving us a second chance and thank you for the privilege you have blessed me with of being a father to our children." He placed a hand on my belly which is just covered by my shirt. I love it when he does that.

With a smile on my face at his powerful declaration, I kissed him with all I have.  Tears run down my face during the passionate kiss and Justin catches each and every one. Justin pulls me onto his lap and I press our bodies more but also being careful with my bump.

My lips never leave his as he socks and nibbles on my bottom lip forcing a soft moan at the back of my throat. He then plunges his tongue into my mouth and I suck on his tongue. A sexy growl rumbles in his chest and I internally smile.

We continued to kiss until we eventually let each other go to get some air in our lungs. At least that is what I thought before Justin continued his assault on my neck making me gasp and my breath comes out in small heavy pants.

"Did I mention how much I love you Lerato Candice Moloi?" He says in-between his kisses.

"Mmm," I hum, "but baby it's Lerato Candice Hudson."

Justin pulled away.

"What?" He asked in confusion.

"I still have my ring on and so do you." I explained enjoying his confusion a bit more than I should.

"The divorce—"

"I never finalized it so legally we're still married." I explained. He looked at me in shock.

"What? You were hoping to get rid of me so quickly, at least let us have our honeymoon phase." I joked and he smirked.

"Oh you'll have your honeymoon phase alright." He smiled devishly at me and nibbled on my collar bone.

I took off his shirt and my eyes greedily drank in his toned abs that I wished to lick everywhere.

That is before one of the kids decided to kick my bladder.

"Ugh kids, you couldn't wait until Mommy and Daddy had their fun." I looked down at my belly and got off Justin's lap.

"I'll be back, don't move." I said and rushed off to the bathroom while Justin's laughter echoed behind me.

*****

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Have a good day my Candy readers....

XOXO
Khanya.

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