Let's Go Back

Swear To Me

Steve and Natasha both knew where they'd find him. Whenever he was sad or upset, he would go to the lake.

It would take Steve over an hour to get there but he knew he had to go to him. Planning was important but family was everything. He had to talk to JJ before he could continue to plan. The others could brainstorm and catch him up later.

Natasha wanted to come with him but he convinced her that this was something he had to do on his own. JJ thought that he had destroyed their relationship and he needed to make sure that JJ knew that wasn't the case. He was a kid working against cosmic forces when he got his powers, he didn't have a choice in the matter as much as he may think he did. It wasn't his fault Sarah and Steven were gone anymore than it was Steve's fault.

He gets in the car and starts the drive from the facility to his house. When he gets there, he parks and starts the trek to the lake. He's made this walk many times but only when JJ isn't around. He knows that this place is JJ's safe haven and he never wanted to take that from him. Still, Steve still goes there because even though Lizzie never came here in this time, she was here in JJ's time. It makes him feel closer to Lizzie and Bucky.

The lake is to JJ what the old lookout was to Steve, Bucky and Lizzie. Whenever they were sad or upset, they went to the lookout. Steve still goes up to the old lookout every year on the anniversary of the day that him and Lizzie met Bucky. He's never told anyone about that place which is why he tries to respect JJ's safe place.

When he arrives, he almost thinks he was wrong and JJ isn't there. JJ could literally go anywhere in the world so there is a chance he isn't here. However, as he walks forward, he sees him sitting near the base of a tree with his head resting on his knees.

Steve moves as quietly as he can. He doesn't want to spook JJ and have him teleport away. He knows from experience that if JJ doesn't want to get found, he never will be.

When he's about ten feet away from him, he speaks.

"Jay-bird," Steve says softly.

JJ's head snaps up and Steve can instantly tell he's been crying. He knows that JJ's surprise will fade soon and he'll try to teleport away.

"Don't leave please! I need to talk to you," Steve says desperately.

He can see the temptation to flee in JJ's eyes but he knows he's going to stay. JJ's guilt will keep him here. JJ gives a small nod and Steve takes that as permission to approach him.

He sits next to JJ and they both look out across the lake. The sun is about to set over the water and it's truly beautiful.

"I'm so sorry," JJ whispers.

"It's not your fault," Steve says instantly.

"Yes it is. They would have never been here of it wasn't for me," JJ says.

"You are incredibly talented and smart, Jay, but you don't have mind control. Steven and Sarah made their own choices. I don't know why you guys decided to come here but whatever it was for, you must have had a reason. You three are the kindest and most empathetic kids that I know so I doubt whatever you were doing was for selfish reasons," Steve says.

He can see JJ about to object to his statement but he quickly interrupts.

"When I thought your dad died during the war, I was a wreck. He died on a mission while following me. I felt like it was all my fault that he was dead. I felt I failed your father and I ruined your mom's future. I was drowning my sorrows in alcohol when your Aunt Peggy found me. I'm going to ask you the same questions that she asked me: did you believe in Sarah and Steven? Did you respect them?" Steve asks.