old cigarettes | min yoongi

lviii.

it was another lazy sunday at the house, all of the members doing nothing in particular. the younger members had hidden themselves away in jungkook's room to do who knows what, and yoongi wasn't entirely certain that he actually wanted to know. some things are better left unsaid, or un-thought-about.

yoongi was partaking in his usual sunday morning ritual of going downstairs for around five minutes to get food, avoiding conversation at all costs, and then retreating to his room for the rest of the day. something was gnawing at the corners of his mind and he was determined to ignore it, clicking on any YouTube video in his recommended.

he was more invested in his thoughts than any video that crossed his screen though, not even noticing when hoseok came into the room until he was standing right in front of him. yoonig jumped, slamming his laptop shut in surprise.

hoseok raised an eyebrow. "what? were you watching porn or something?" yoongi tried to stumble out a response or a denial, but it didn't work as hoseok chuckled through his attempts. "i was joking, don't worry. i just wanted to know if you were doing okay. you've been quieter than usual.

yoongi shot him an incredulous look. "how did you even notice that? i was literally downstairs for two minutes, tops."

"you didn't say anything when i said good morning to you while we were in the kitchen."

"you were in the kitchen when i was?"

"exactly."

"ugh, fine. you win. i'm just... scared," yoongi sighed, leaning back against the wall behind his bed, "what if something happens to nari? like with what happened with aera and eunji?"

a sad smile came to hoseok's face as he made himself comfortable by sitting on yoongi's pillows. "i'm sure she'll be fine. you just wait, we'll come back from the States and she'll have a contract and have won the whole competition. besides, if anything does go wrong, you'll have your phone with you, so her or jin-ae can always call if something goes drastically wrong."

yoongi's eyes drifted through space, not really lingering on anything as he refused to meet hoseok's eyes. "i know. and i really feel bad, because eunji was your best friend, you know? so why am i whining when you deserve to whine about how worried you are more? you don't even look worried half the time."

hoseok let out a tired sigh. "of course i'm worried. i can't even use words to describe just how worried i am. but until she gets out of the hospital, there's really nothing i can do. it's more what i could've done. but you deserve to be worried just as much as i do. just because i have bigger problems does not erase the fact that you have problems too. we each have different personalities and different ways of dealing with things and different tolerance levels; it's just human nature. don't beat yourself up over the fact that we're inevitably human."

"have you been spending too much time around namjoon or something?" yoongi raised an amused eyebrow, finally turning to hold eye contact. "but, seriously though, i appreciated that. i feel better now. but... y'know, if you ever feel down because of everything and need to talk, i'm right down the hall, okay?"

hoseok rolled his eyes, a little bit of happiness seeping back into them. "yeah, yeah, i got it. if i want to talk about mushy shit like my feelings, i come here." yoongi barked out a laugh at that, watching hoseok as he got up to leave. but he suddenly whipped back around, seeming to have remembered something. "oh, and don't forget. kookie wants us all downstairs for movie night. jin's cooking proper food instead of just plain microwave meals."

"yessss. i need that. as much as i love microwaved food, nothing really compares to proper food."

"especially when jin's cooking it. don't forget, okay? kookie will never let you live it down if you do." hoseok said over his shoulder as he left yoongi's room, disappearing down the hall.

yoongi scratched his head in thought. what hoseok had said wasn't wrong, but it wasn't going to stop him from feeling guilty. if anything, he was still worried, but at least he had a proper meal to look forward to. it wasn't that they didn't have time for proper meals, it was more that no one could be bothered.

the hours passed in a blur, and when it was finally time for yoongi to head downstairs as to not invoke jungkook's wrath, he decided to shoot nari a quick text before dumping his phone on his bed. with a closing of his door that seemed almost symbolic in a way he couldn't place, yoongi headed down for dinner, and away from his worries for the night.