the dollhouse | h.s.

forty four

-
Holly
-

I suddenly bolt up, and Evie's body isn't there anymore. The sticky note and pool of blood is still there, though.

At first, I think where the hell am I and why am I lying on a bathroom tile floor, then I remember that I only recently witnessed seeing a dead, brutally murdered, bloody innocent individual lying on the floor and the frightening note that read in blood 'it's been a while'.

I get up, weakly, with my legs shaking, my eyes wide and my mind confused and spinning. I feel sick to my stomach... Like I'm going to vomit everything and my body will just collapse again.

When I walk into the bedroom, I see everyone balling their eyes out.

"Stop!" I scream, "One of you girls! Why!"

"Holly, we're all really sad-" Liz tries to cheer me up.

I've had enough. I'm going insane. How am I supposed to trust these girls? One of them is faking and have just killed their best friend and most importantly an innocent, beautiful young woman.

"Stop! Who killed Evie! Why!" I break down to the floor and cry, "Why?!"

Unknown voices start to bounce around in my head, blocking out all my hearing. I scream and scream. I pull out my hair and throw everything around in anger.

"You passed out when you saw Evie. She's in Niall's death room now." Juliet says, sniffling and trying not to cry.

"Niall's death room? N-Niall's death room! With Beth! Huh!? With Beth?!" I scream as loud as I can.

"Holly, enough! Why would you bring Beth up!" Juliet yells at me.

I start to tug at my hair as I cry hysterically. My mind and body can't take the madness anymore.

"Beth is alive! She's alive! Beth!" My voice goes hoarse from all my screaming and yelling but I force myself and try my hardest to scream every word out.

"Holly, Evie was my best friend, I miss her so much. She's an angel now... A beautiful, loving angel," Liz starts to burst into tears, "she's in a better place"

I ignore everything Liz says, as my breathing goes rapid, my lips start to quiver and my hands start to shake. I've had enough. All the insanity that's been stored up inside me, locked in a cage, has finally burst out and I'm going absolutely mental.

"Stop! I can't..." I run out of breath, "Stop it!"

"I can't breathe! Enough, enough! Voices! Voices! Stop it!" I completely stop breathing for a while, "Shut up! Evie... No!" I start going absolutely psychotic, pulling out my hair and squeezing my eyes shut, pacing back and forth and tripping over my own feet.

"Holly, enough!" Macy yells at the top of her lungs in a powerful and scary tone, causing everyone's jaw to drop. Usually Macy is the sensitive, always happy one who never raises her voice.

Dakota tucks my hair behind my ear and whispers, "Shh, you'll be fine."

When Dakota whispers to me, I start to feel the smallest bit calmer. I slowly breathe and try to stop the tears rolling down my cheek. The voices inside my head slowly faint away.

Suddenly, Harry slowly opens the bedroom door.

"Dolls, just leave Holly alone, she needs time." He whispers, and I see his eyes are red from crying even though he tries to hide it.

All the girls leave, still quietly crying.

I'm left alone. I sit in the corner of the room, my back leaning against the pink wall and my knees at my chest while I try to stop crying. Of course I'm crying because of Evie, but I'm also crying because of just everything in general. I've finally cracked.

Harry walks into the bedroom, and he frowns at the awful sight of my weak, crying self.

"Come on, get into bed" Harry says extending his hand towards me, I weakly grab on and he helps me get up.

I walk to my bed, which inconveniently is on the other side of the room.

I get into bed, and immediately start quietly crying because Evie will no longer be in the bed next to me. I'll have to get used to not seeing her smiling, joyful face in the early morning as she stretches and does her yoga routines everyone's use to. I'll never see her at the table at breakfast, eating toast and drinking her favourite drink, apple juice. I'll never get to mess around with her and style her pixie cut hair into an immature yet hilarious hairstyle. I'll never get to stay up late talking about the world and philosophy with her. I'll never get be a part of her rebellious actions. I'll never get to make stupid dance routines with her. I'll never get to hear her beautiful, soft singing, her secret talent. I'll never get to have water fights with her. I'll never get to pose as she draws a perfect portrait. I'll never get to laugh with her. Cry with her. Smile with her. Hug her. Tell her she is worthy of everything and is absolutely gorgeous and strong. Evie was such a beautiful soul. I'll definitely miss her. I'll definitely miss my favourite person in the whole world.

"Try going to sleep, darling" Harry says, crouching down next to me.

"No... I can't." I shake my head.

"Evie was-"

I cut Harry off, "No, just stop. Okay. I don't wanna talk about it."

"I know you're sad-"

"Shut up and go away. I don't wanna talk to anyone."

"You need to get some rest, Holly" Harry says, holding my cold hand.

I shut my eyes, trying to sleep, but I just can't, my eyes are closed but I can't sleep.

"I can't sleep, though" I look up the ceiling.

"Just close your eyes" Harry whispers, and the sweet sound of his raspy voice instantly closes my eyes.

"Love when she goes,
Leave when he comes,
You need to be sane,
Don't become of one,
The moon watches you sleep,
It sees everything about you,
Make sure it doesn't see your sins,
Because I know I do,
Love when he comes,
Leave when she goes,
You're the only one harming,
Just promise me,
You won't lose yourself, darling."

The warming sound of Harry's angelic voice when he sings makes me slowly fall asleep, forgetting the world but definitely not forgetting Evie.

A/N: DOUBLE UPDATE HOW COOL AM I!!!

I literally just made that song poem thing on the spot so don't blame me that it's awful

anyway cya lol