Iceland's Diary: It Began In Summer

Wednesday, October 26

Dear Diary:

HELP

THEY WANT TO TEACH ME HOW TO DRIVE

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I'M AN ASS DRIVING

I CAN'T EVEN

It's like teaching a goat to drive

Except that the goat would do better

They even bought me one of those cool leather jackets for driving. I like the jacket, I'm using it now. It smells like new pine tree

Worst of all, they didn't even buy me a car. I'm supposed to learn on a rusty old can with wheels they call a "car".

If I actually run over someone for some reason they'll probably die of an infection rather than the impact  ;-;

Boi I got nothing better to do...

I'm gonna go express my boredom downstairs for a while,  I'll be back-

_______________

Ok, last time I'm doing that

The second I said "I'm bored-"  Norway popped outta the sewers and screamed "wASH THE DISHES-" 

And because I didn't think of a reply fast enough,  I blinked and found myself in front of the sink with a sponge and a plate.  Magic fucker-

I like listening to music while I do things I dislike,  so I said "why not"  and put on my NEW BIG ASS BLUE HEADPHONES (I swear,  I don't like bragging-) and started scrubbing the plate. 

Honestly,  It looked like the sponge was doing disturbing things to the plate...

Anyways,  you know that part in a song that's like a magnet? There's ALWAYS this part in a song that's like "sing me,  you know you want to.... dance along to me...."  and that's how I got forced into singing and dancing to that song,  which is my most favorite song in the whole world (you should also know that it was some sort of punk song mixed with rock...)

There were several broken plates.

And a wooden spoon... that got broken on my head when Norway found out.

Never again.... EVER

________________

Alright so I went to my room after a long day and what do I see?? Two sleeping puffins on my bed, which took 15 minutes to fix and clean this morning.  Of course,  I didn't do anything about it.  I sat next to them and- oh?  They both looked exactly alike (besides the fact that Mr. Puffin wears a bow tie).  Same size,  everything.  If Mr. Puffin didn't speak,  I could easily say they're twins.

Me: Hey.... Mr. Puffin-

Mr. P:  (who just woke up)  ????

Me: You both look exactly alike...

Mr. P: I know.... I still don't know if the lil thing's a girl or boy

Me: Goddammit Mr. Puffin!

I can't even

Truth is,  no one knows.  We don't want to know either.  Everything is ok like this honestly.

_________________

Alright,  who the FUCK invented anime????

Son of a- I CRIED 22 TIMES

22 TIMES IN ONE EPISODE

Worst is,  it's supposed to be a comedy anime...

C O M E D Y

Jeezus- poor people that decide to watch a sad one

It wasn't even crying,  more like an ugly sob where you just wanna drown in ice cream and die.

Also,  I wanna know who in the goddamn world invented table legs. They could of just made the table hang from the ceiling with cords or something-

But noooooo

They just HAD to put legs on the freaking table.

Let's just say that I unintentionally kicked it really hard and now I'm sobbing in a corner.  I'm not okay, alright?

I'm suing Sweden for this.

-mE