Iceland's Diary: It Began In Summer

Saturday, October 22

Dear Diary:

Wow,  I- I just keep forgetting this.

Someone kill me.

Okay so,  it's starting to get really cold over here and I'm freezing my ass off with this stupid brown sweater.  I'm really poor at the moment because I went on a shopping spree at the mall.... the candy shop by the way.

I discovered this new website and I'm so obsessed.  Someone please help me.  I downloaded this other app too, which is really interesting, about some type of message thingies.  I don't know.

Sealand has been bugging me all afternoon saying weird things like

Sealand: You should bow before the goat lord,  lord of the goats

Or

Sealand: Where do babies come from?

Me: .......

Sweden: E-bay

Sweden was not allowed on the computer this afternoon.

______________

I've honestly never felt so useless in my life. Today was a freaking good example of it.

Like when Norway bought a flute for me today for some reason and forced me to play it.

Me: How do I play the flute?

Norway: Just blow...

Me: ........

So I did that.  Norway ran away from the room and a small glass exploded.

Or today when I was playing with a pencil and it suddenly flew across the room and poked Finland in the eye.

Or when I tripped down the stairs because of my long shoelaces and fell on top of Hanatamago.  Poor dog.

OH! And when I walked into the kitchen and ruined a surprise present (which took 5 hours to make) that was supposed to be for me because I wasn't on my phone for three hours straight.

I didn't get scolded even once (I mean,  come on... I'm old enough)  but I still feel terribly bad,  so I'm going to make it up for everyone and invite them out to lunch.... with their money of course.  I'm poor.

It's gonna be a nice place... like Subway or something. I'm gonna tell everyone my plans, but I'm gonna say it was Mr. Puffin's idea because If nobody likes it I can blame it on him.

Hahaha I'm so evil

______________

Okay what the hell?

You know what happened?? I'll tell you. It's so fucking rude.

There I was,  telling my plan to everyone cuz I'm a good person (I decided that I was going to pay after I miraculously found money on the floor....yeahhh) and then Norway's all like

Norway: That sounds nice.  You should invite Hong Kong as well so you don't get bored.

BITCH NO

If someone freaking invites you out for lunch,  it's because they're planning on talking to you. Were they actually expecting me to just sit down and watch them eat and talk??  Heeeeeell NO

I didn't refuse his offer though... 

______________

I don't have words for today...

It started out pretty nice,  the six of us were eating our sandwiches in FUCKING PEACE until

Denmark:  Hey um..... Norway..... I have a song for you

Norway: ....... ok

Me:  We're in a public place-

And the dumbass gave no shit about that.  The song was pretty nice.  I don't remember what it was called though.  Something about a rose.

Anywho- Norway was like "uh,  uh- what's happening??"  during the whole song and I was like "public place... this is a public place"

After the song Norway was all like "omg I um,  maybe had some feelings for you but I never wanted to say because I'm a fucking tsundere from hell"  and they made out quietly. I was like

Me: BITCH THIS IS A PUBLIC PLACE

And the people just stared at us with their soulless eyes.

It was a very uncomfortable moment so we got up and left,  but before

HK: Hey! I.... got a song for you too

Me: .... what the fuck? Uh... okay.  I guess. If it isn't cringe-

HK:  I THINK I LOVE YOU MORE THAN A JAPANESE LOVES-

And that's how we got kicked outta Subway.

Interesting day,  I dare to say.  I think the ones who most suffered were Sweden and Finland. 

Nice life I got...

Nice

-Me

*cri cuz dis suks*