Emptiness (Hyunlix)

chapter 25

Felix pov

Why the fuck I did that?
I was fine before, what got me into doing this? Why was I so pissed?

"Why would I? Jisung really knows me better than anyone"

Right.

After hyunjin said that, i didn't feel fine at all. I felt really unhappy with that information.

But why?

It is good that Hyunjin at least had jisung as a friend. And jisung really cares about hyunjin. He always talked about how he wanted hyunjin in our group as well.

It's good that Hyunjin seems to care about jisung as well. I mean he is his only friend. Of course he will care about him.

'Does jisung also make hyunjin smile?'

'Does hyunjin hug him like he is hugging me right now?'

Even if he does all that.... isn't it good that hyunjin had someone important in his life?

I tightened our hug with this thought.

'No'

'I want to be the person that knows hyunjin more than anyone'

'I want to be the person that can make him smile from the bottom of his heart'

'i want to be the person that he can hug whenever he wants to feel safe'

'I want to be that someone who is important in his life'

What are these feelings?? I've never felt like this for anyone before. Is this because I'm guilty about him having suicidal thoughts that I want to make it up to him?or is it something else?

I don't know. I really don't. But right now i just want to hold him in my arms. Be with him as close as possible.

Hyunjin's back was leaning against the wall, i hugged him as i pressed my head on his chest. He wrapped his arm around my waist, pressing our bodies together, holding me tight while stroking my hair with his other hand. He leaned his head on my shoulder.

I felt so comfortable but I love hugging, i hug people all the time.

But why does this feel different?

Different in a good way. Like my heart is beating too fast and i feel like throwing up from my stomach but nothing's actually coming out.

I'm so fucking confused right now.

I dozed off as i felt warm and cozy with me in his arms.

                             ---------

"GET THE FUCK UP FUCKERS" I heard a someone scream.

'Who the fuck is disturbing my beauty sleep?'

I Slowly titled my head in the direction to see who this bitch is. I opened my eyes lazily and still half sleepy. I saw jisung in the middle and all others behind him were looking at me.

"When we didn't hear any sounds, we didn't think you'd actually be sleeping" seungmin said.

"But it's cute tho" i.n said while smiling at me. And others seem like still processing what they're seeing right now.

'Wait what are they seeing?'

Only then i woke up fully and realised why they were shocked.