The final, fading hope.

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This is the last poem I'll write about you

because I need to say a few things.

Oh where, oh where should I begin?

You know when I said I was over you?

I thought it was true, but it's really not.

I still love you with all my heart

and I always will, just like I told you.

I've been reading our texts back and forth

from when we were still together.

We were so fucking cute, I want that again.

I'm willing to change. I've realized something.

I lied to you, oh so long ago

about trying harder in school for you.

That was pretty shitty of me.

So I'll make it up to you and myself,

for the second part of the year I'm making a promise.

I will try my hardest to do good in school

and it's probably better if my dad takes my shit

because its all distracting, my phone, my ipod.

That part I'm not so thrilled about. My ipod.

My music is my mood regulator and my prescription.

It keeps me sane in this fucked up world we live in.

I finally have a goal, something to look forward to

because in my head I see is together again

but that could just be hope.

I don't know. I dream about you,

I think about you, I fantasize about you.

This has to be some sort of sign.

It felt so much like I was over you

and now, spontaneously, I'm not.

I love you with all my heart

and if you don't love me, that's just fine.

You just seem like the right person for me

and every other girl seems uninteresting.

I wish I could rewind to freshman year

so I could make this all okay,

so we could go back to texting each other cute stuff.

You're so fucking beautiful, it drives me crazy,

you're so fucking awesome, I just wanna be with you all the time.

You are the bright light at the end of the dark tunnel.

You are, and always will be, my everything.

If only you still liked me, if only...

if only you'd hang out with me

so that we could have some more time together

to talk, maybe just stare into each other's eyes.

I long to kiss those beautiful lips of yours

because I always felt a spark when we kissed,

I had a million butterflies in my stomach.

I miss you so much my heart aches

and I would give anything to have you back.

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