Sam has been at 12 Grimmauld Place for only a week and she's never felt more fulfilled. She spends every day talking with Sirius; he asks her to fill him in on everything he missed and he tells her stories of her mother and his time at school with James, Lily and Remus. They sit for hours just talking and she never realized what she's been missing until now. Ron, Fred and George should be arriving within the next two to three weeks, then Molly and Arthur will join and start their meetings, and sometime in the middle of their holiday, Hermione will arrive. But everytime Sam asks when Harry will get here, he changes the subject. Sirius asked her not to tell Harry anything about the Order, which she finds ridiculous but she obeys nonetheless.
Sirius has been trying to teach her ways to control her emotions and her magic, but so far it's been slow progress because all she feels is joy. Today, they both sit in the drawing room as she shows him the pictures in her scrapbook.
"So, I took this in July last year before the World Cup. Fred and George set up a whole day of fun for us. It's one of my favorite memories," Sam smiles widely at the memory.
"Is that you and Harry with sparklers?" Sirius asks amusedly.
"Well, you see, I may or may not have chased him around with it," she says as she pulls her lips in, trying to hold in a laugh.
Sirius laughs loudly, "You both are so much like James and I used to be."
"He was your tethered soul, right?" Sam asks and Sirius nods with a smile, "What did it feel like when he died? Did you feel it?"
Sirius looks away for a moment at the picture on the mantelpiece, a picture of him and James, "I wasn't there when he and Lily... but yes, I felt it. It was like a piece of me died with him. I knew the moment it happened."
Sam pulls him in for a hug that he gladly returns. Not being able to raise her and experience her first day at school, her stories of the years, not even being able to write to her, it broke his heart. Being able to know her, to watch her grow, hear her stories now... it feels like something has healed his heart.
"Please don't ever leave me again," she whispers.
"I will always be with you, no matter what. I will always be here for you," he assures.
She flips the page of the scrapbook and regrets it instantly.
"Is that you and Harry?" He points to the page of their dance at the Yule Ball and their kiss.
"Uh- yeah..." she glances at him with worried eyes and his mouth gapes.
"Damn, I owe your mother and Lily 10 Galleons."
She looks at him partially between shock and wonder.
"After watching you both interact for the first time, they figured eventually you two would end up together. James and I absolutely rejected the idea. I didn't want to imagine my daughter dating ever," he pauses for a moment and tilts his head at the picture, "but now that I see it, I wouldn't trust anyone else to keep you safe."
She smiles and looks at the pictures of them, "But now that I know, I will be giving him the talk."
"Oh Godric, please don't," she covers her face with her hands in embarrassment.
After an hour of laughing at each other's stories, they get ready for another lesson. Sirius pushes all the furniture out of the way and stands in front of her.
"I know this isn't fun, but it will come in handy one day otherwise your mother wouldn't have taught me how to help."
She takes a deep breath, "I'm ready."
"Remember, think of a memory, either of pain or anger."
She searches her mind, looking for the right one. They haven't been successful in their past attempts and she wants this to work. She remembers the night Cedric died, having to watch her friends and her family take on her pain because she couldn't handle it. The feeling of regret and pain consumes her, she was useless that night. Voices in her head egged on her pain, trying to turn it into anger. She shuts her eyes tightly and clenches her fist as dark green magic sparks out of her hands.
"Okay, good. Now turn it into a memory of bliss- of love," he informs her.
She takes shaky breaths as she tries to remember the good memories, but the pain overtakes her mind, "I can't- I can't."
The green sparks soon turn into something similar to that of lighting.
"Breathe, baby, breathe. Find one and hold it, just one. Make it shine."
Memories flash through her mind and she holds onto the night of her birthday. She can see the smiles on her friends, hear their laughter, feel Harry's hand in hers; and it breaks through like sunlight. She slowly unclenches her fists and the magic flows back into her hands.
"That's it, that's it," Sam opens her eyes to see Sirius smiling at her, "You did it, that was amazing," he wraps her in a hug.
She pulls away, "But what do I do when I can't control it, like when I hit a low... or if the anger is too strong?"
"Practice, darling. That's why we do this. You will always feel things deeper than others, it's a blessing and a curse. We can't change that, but we can learn to cope with it without hurting others in the process."
She nods slowly, "Can I write to Harry?"
He sighs, "Yes, but you know the rules, he can't know."
She lets out a breath, obviously very frustrated. She walks up to her room. She never gets tired of calling it 'her room'. Her own room, in the home she was always meant to grow up in. She sits on her bed and pulls out a quill and paper. Her eyes fall on the photo of her and Harry dancing and she smiles. As she starts to write, she doesn't exactly know what to say. What is she allowed to tell him and what can she not? She doesn't want to lie to him, but she's worried that keeping him in the dark will upset him.
She looks up and out her door, making sure Sirius isn't nearby. She begins to write truthfully and tells him everything she knows. As she ends the letter and folds it up, it sets itself on fire and becomes ash. Sirius steps into her room.
"What did I tell you?" He asks her, not sternly but slightly disappointed.
Two weeks go by and every time she tries to write Harry a letter, it goes up in flames, literally. Most of her days are spent talking with Sirius, practicing her control, and obnoxiously singing and dancing with her dad. She takes several pictures of them both together and places them in her scrapbook or framing a few. Ron, Fred and George finally arrive and they set up their rooms. The first few days they spend pranking Sirius, until they figure out why the Marauders were considered the troublemakers during their time at Hogwarts. Every prank they pull, Sirius hits back twice as hard.
Fred and George finally turn 17 and they begin using magic for every little thing, including apparating and disapparating. All privacy she had flies out the window. She tries several times to break whatever spell is on her paper and fails each time. She decides to steal some of Ron's and begins to write to Harry again. Unfortunately, the twins apparate at just the right time.
"Sirius! She's writing to Harry!" They shout before she can hear a snap of someone's fingers and her paper turns to ask.
"You stupid prats!" She yells as Sirius walks in.
We've talked about this, Sam," Sirius scolds.
She rolls her eyes, "I don't want to lie to him or keep him in the dark. That's not fair."
"Well, you're- what do they call it? Grounded, that's right. You're grounded."
"I can't leave," she deadpans.
He looks around the room, "Fine, then no Ron."
Ron bursts into the room, "What?!"
"And no Fred and George either, for two days."
"Wait a minute, that's like grounding all of us!" Fred shouts.
"If we knew this is what would happen, we wouldn't have told you," George mumbles.
"I suppose, now, I'll have to spell all the parchment," Sirius sighs as he exits the room.
Fred leans down, "Don't worry, we'll sneak in tonight."
She smirks and nods as they leave. They are true to their word and that night they all have a quiet sleepover. The twins show them their new inventions for the shop they plan to open and they all talk about what they can do in the house. Little do they know, Sirius is well aware of what they're doing and smiles.
"Just like us when we were teenagers, right James," he says with a smile.