Blue
After uttering her name, she smiled at me. A genuine one.
"Come here, Blue" Lilac said and hug me tight. I laid on the pillow above her lap and wrapped my arms around her waist. "I'm sorry for leaving" she added, making my hug tighter.
I didn't say a word as my guilt crept in me.
"Blue" tawag ng taong nasa likod ng pinto ng nakabukas kong locker.
"I said i'm not interested, Ace" I slammed the door of my locker after getting all my things.
Patapos na ang 2nd sem ko ngayong first year sa college at recruitment time naman ng sisterhood. It's a good clan actually, the benefits are promising plus it's filled with elite people with good heart but I don't think I have that heart. Mine just hurt so good.
"But Jessey wants you in" this is why I like Gray than Kean, 'cause this girl is like a puppet na lahat yata ng utos ni Jessey ay sinusunod while Gray is cool at kinatatakutan.
"I. Don't." I sternly said then rolled my eyes. I was about to pass her when she grabbed my arm.
"Okay I understand. But pwede favor?" I arched my brow as I wait for what she will say next. "I don't have a car right now, can I get a lift?" Ha! the audacity of this Laurel, ako pa talagang isang Williams ang gustong maghatid sa kanya. If not because of my grandpa, their business will not take off and be big.
"No." tanggi ko.
"It's raining, matitiis mo ba ako?"
"Yes."
"Even if I cry?" kulit pa nito at nagpacute habang tinatali ang buhok, exposing her nape.
My forehead furrowed, I'm starting to get irritated. "Are you trying to hit on me, 'cause girl you're definitely not my type" I looked at her from head to toe at umiling.
"Bakit nagagandahan ka ba sa 'kin?" subok nito matapos magtali. Kean is pretty and kinda hot pero wala namang epekto sa 'kin, marahil sawa na ako sa mukha niya dahil sa magkaklase kami buong taon.
Mas lalong lumakas ang ulan na sinabayan pa ng pagkulog at kidlat na kita ang pag guhit sa langit. I looked at Kean and saw how worried she is, parang nag iisip kung lulusong ba siya sa ulan o hihintayin itong tumila.
"Come on, no questions" yaya ko rito. "And carry these" dagdag ko at ibinigay sa kanya ang libro at ilang gamit ko pangdrawing. Sinong mag-aakala na ang sikat na snob na 'to ay kaya kong alilain.
I started walking towards my car in front of our college building and Kean followed me. Pagbaba ng stairs ay napahinto ito sa paglalakad at nakipagngitian sa isang babae. The girl also smiled at me pero hindi ko pinansin.
"You know her?" She asked and started walking.
"No." Tipid kong sagot. I'm just flirt and not friendly. I might have to make out with you first before knowing your name. Bilang lang sa daliri sa kamay ang kilala ko sa school maliban sa basketball teammates ko.
"She's a Montenegro"
"I only know Clarrise" tukoy ko sa classmate namin na isang Montenegro.
"That's her older sister, ang hot niya ano? She looks like a goddess" manghang sabi nito na nakapagpaikot ng mata ko.
"Kinda" I nonchalantly said, letting her know i'm not interested. Maganda at sexy naman talaga 'yong ate ni Clarrise but I want Kean to shut her mouth already 'cause once I engaged to her topic ay mangungulit na naman 'yan na sumali ako sa sisterhood nila. They said it's a privilege kapag ininvite ka than being applicant but I don't really wanna join the club. Masyadong maraming tao doon and I hate people, I hate socializing.
"This is your car?" She asked when we stopped in front of my dad's car. Hindi siya makapaniwala dahil mas mayaman kami sa angkan nila pero hindi sports car ang dala ko gaya nilang magkapatid.
"My dad's" sagot ko at inaya siya pumasok.
Nabasa pa ako ng kaunti dahil pinagbuksan ko siya ng kotse, wala siyang free hand dahil dala niya ang mga gamit ko.
"Blue!!!" rinig kong tawag ng isang pamilyar na boses, my fav cousin.
"Get in!" She immediately hopped in. Nagulat pa siya nang makita si Kean sa passengers seat.
"Hi! I'm Lilac" pakilala ng pinsan ko.
"Kean.. nice hair by the way" puri ni Kean sa buhok niyang may 4 inches na color violet sa baba.
Hindi na sila natapos mag-usap until bumaba si Kean. Napagkwentuhan rin nila ang sisterhood and how it helped thousands of people that made my cousin interested in joining.
"Gosh Blue, I wanna join" masayang sabi nito.
"She didn't invite you" pagputol ko sa excitement.
"Maybe you could make a way. Best friend mo naman si Jessey"
"I don't know. Baka ako ang kulitin niyang sumali" I frustratingly sighed at the thought of me talking to Jessey after I ditch her for 3 weeks.
"Bakit ba kasi ayaw mo? 'Di ka pa ba nasasawa kakamukmok mo sa break up niyo ni Stella?" I rolled my eyes and didn't say a word until we get home.
Once I started reasoning out, she'll never stop telling me to move on.
Evening came and Jessey bombarded my inbox and call logs. It's a week before the initiation and ayaw niya talaga akong tantanan.
"No." Agad kong sabi when I finally answer her call.
"Come on Blue, gusto ko ikaw ang pumalit sa 'kin as co-leader than Kean" she said on the other line making me want to hang up. She's about to be promoted as Leader 'cause she's the only one who's qualified as of the moment.
"I don't care and I hate responsibilities" iritableng sagot ko rito. "Besides it would be unfair for Kean who dedicated her heart to your org" sabi ko pang kunwari ay naaawa sa tutang iyon pero sa totoo ay ayaw ko lang talaga at gagawin ko lahat makaiwas lang sa pangungulit ni Jessey. Student-athlete ako, doon pa lang ubos na oras at pagod ko.
"Kung bakit ba naman kasi tamad ka" reklamo nito. Sa isip ko'y kung kaharap ko siya ay sinuntok ko na siya. "Ayaw mo ba talaga akong kasama gumawa ng maganda?" I cringed at what she said. Malayo ang age gap namin ni Jessey pero magkasundo kami lalo na sa kalokohan that's why i'm wondering why suddenly she wanna do good.
"Kung may maipasok ba ako sa org mo ay titigilan niyo akong magpinsan?" I replied instead and eyed Lilac who just smiled at me, naeexcite na mapasama sa clan na iyon.
"Who is it then?" Tanong nito.
"My cousin, Lilac"
"The pride of accountancy right?" usisa nito. Seems planning on how she'll benefit from my cousin.
"Yes"
"Kinda deal, we'll need her in the future" masayang sabi nito. "Pero mas masaya ako kung ikaw ang sasali" she added that made me hang up the call.
My cousin hugged me when I smiled at her.
"Thank you, thank you!" she happily said.
Day of the initiation ay hindi ako mapakali. Lilac showed up wearing leather jacket, tank top at mini skirt. Nakaboots din ito making her look like a gangster, well, a sexy and gorgeous one.
"Hindi gang ang sasalihan mo" I chuckled when she frowned saka pinagbuksan siya ng kotse.
"Hindi mo man lang ba sasabihing maganda ako" hingi nito ng compliment.
"You look good" she glared at me which made me laugh. Kahit kaunti gumaan ang pakiramdam ko but still, kinakabahan pa rin ako.
When we got inside the mansion, I immediately opened the car door for Lilac thinking hindi na ako kukulitin ni Jessey sumali sa pesteng org na 'to.
"Blue Williams is in the house" said someone from the parking lot.
"So?" Sagot ko rito bago pumasok sa back door ng bahay where Jessey's waiting.
Bumukas ang pinto but it wasn't her, it's Kean who instructed us to go upstairs where Jessey is.
"Having a change of heart?" I told Lilac but she immediately said no.
I opened Jessey's room pero iba ang nandoon. Hindi ko kilala kung sino, the stranger put a blindfold on my cousin na tutulan ko sana when Jessey popped out of nowhere.
"Easy.. she'll be fine" sabi nito and held Lilac both shoulders.
Mas lalo akong binalot ng kaba. I looked at my cousin who's just smiling at me as if she sees me.
"She'd better be fine" I told Jessey. "Congratulations by the way" puri ko sa kanya dahil siya na ang leader ngayon which means she can move places to places to help other people and by that gaganda ang image niya, balak kasi nitong maging politician at the age of 30 like the former leaders.
"Good luck" I patted Lilac's head and left the house.
I didn't sleep when I got home. Nag-aalala ako, I have no idea what would the initiation would be dahil bawal iyon ipagsabi.
Kinabukasan ay nagprepare akong sunduin si Lilac. Gaya ng dinaanan ko kahapon, sa backdoor ako nagtungo at si Kean ulit ang bumungad sa 'kin.
"What are you? Guard?" I chuckled but she didn't bat an eye on me. Fckin snob.
I went upstairs just to see my cousin filled with bruises and blood. Gulo gulo ang damit niya at parang pagod na pagod ito.
"What happened?" I asked pero wala akong nakuhang sagot.
She seems helpless and uncertainty is written in her eyes.
"I'm here" I told her when she hugged me.
"Take me home"
I saw Jessey behind, tiningnan ko itong nagtatanong kung anong nangyari but she just looked away.
I took Lilac home dahil ayaw nito padala sa pad niya. Inasikaso siya nila Steve at mayor doma namin as I went back to mansion.
"Bet your cousin enjoyed Jessey" said someone while i'm walking upstairs.
"Fuck you?" She just shrugged her shoulders that made me pin her on the railing.
"What happened to my cousin?" she did not answer so I threatened to drop her.
"I'm dead to Jessey kapag sinabi ko" takot niyang sabi.
"I'm holding you right now so i'm the one who will kill you first" panakot ko rito.
"They'll make you choose between pain and pleasure" paunang hingal niyang sabi. "You're cousin didn't have the chance to choose. Someone just grabbed her upstairs. She went out of Jessey's room kanina so I assumed it was her who had your cousin"
"This org is disgusting" I told her at pinakawalan siya.
Naisip ko paano kung pinilit si Lilac kaya siya nagkaganon.
I went to Jessey's room and saw her comfortably sitting on her swivel chair with her feet resting on the table. Malinis na rin ito pero visible ang mga bruise at kalmot nito.
"Did you force my cousin or you allowed it to happen to her?"
Umayos siya ng upo but didn't say a word. She can't even looked at me.
My heart broke into pisces as rain started pouring down. How could she do this to me?
"Jess" I frustratingly plead for an answer while holding her collar, pinning her on the chair.
I punched her several times pero hindi siya sumagot.
"I despise you" I said with gritted teeth and left the place and our friendship.
The next day Lilac left the country without telling me and I died more inside.
I woke up in her lap. Nakaidlip pala ako kakaisip ng nakaraan.
"I'm sorry" I uttered and cry.
Kung simpleng tumaggi lang ako sa alok ni Jessey noon at hindi ko sinama si Lilac ay walang nangyaring masama rito.
"Wala kang kasalanan" she said in her most comforting voice while finger-combing my hair.
Inaya niya ako sa baba at nagpaluto kay Kate ng makakain.
Walang nagsasalita sa 'min habang nanunuod ng tv. I looked at her, she never changed and still loves the shade of purple. Head to toe ay puro violet, lavender and iris ang makikita sa kanya.
"Kumusta ka" she asked at hinilig ako sa balikat niya.
"Trying to be better than before" I chuckled when she looked at me in confusion and told me to share more.
"I met a girl last year" I smiled thinking she's the best thing ever happened to me. "I'm planning to propose 'cause I don't think i'll ever love someone again so yeah, I wanna change some things first"
"Kaya pala nag-aaral ka daw ng mabuti ngayon sabi ni Steve"
"You and Kuya met already?" takang tanong ko.
"He picked me up at the airport"
She combed my hair using fingers at prenteng naupo siya sa couch.
"Bakit hindi ako?"
"Busy ka sa school" tipid niyang sagot.
"I can make time for you" may tampo sa boses ko kaya natawa siya.
"Busy rin ako last week. In fact I went to your school and waited outside but your girlfriend came and also waited for you, may date yata kayo"
The last time Alexa picked me up ay monthsary namin.
"You should've let me see you para naipakilala kita"
"Ayaw ko nga. I want to see how she cares for you. Kung paano siya maging girlfriend sa 'yo"
"Mas lalo mo siyang nakilala if you joined us" I rolled my eyes.
Hindi ko alam kung kailan kami makakapagkita ni Alexa ulit dahil busy ito dahil anytime in this month ay mag-oopen na ang volleyball league na pinaghahandaan nila kaya nadagdagan ang oras ng training nila.
"Invite mo kaya magdinner tonight?" Lilac suggested and I just mouthed "i'll try" and was about to stand up to phone my love when she stopped me.
"I'll talk to her" hesistant man ay ibinigay ko pa rin ang phone ko. "Name?" she asked pagkabigay ko.
"Love" sagot ko at maya-maya pa ay sinagot na ni Alexa ang tawag.
Lumapit naman ako sa likod ng phone ko at nakinig.
"Hello" Lilac flirtatiously said so I glared at her.
"Uhm who's this?" I smiled when I heard her voice kahit na nga ba maingay ang background, I think she's in the car.
"Are you busy?" hindi niya inaalis ang tono niya kaya nakurot ko siya sa tagiliran. Landiin ba naman ang girlfriend ko.
"Pauwi pa lang. Teka sino ba kasi 'to?" tanong ulit nito. Halata sa boses na nakukulitan na. "Don't tell me babae ka ni Blue kung hindi pagbubuhulin ko kayo" natawa kami ni Lilac sa sinabi nito pero natigil kami ng patayan kami ng tawag.
"Oh gosh you're girlfriend's funny. Akin na ang number niya't tatawagan ko. Baka hindi sagutin kapag number mo ang gamit" iiling-iling na sabi nito at kinuha ang number ni Alexa para tawagan niya.
"No one hangs up on me" mataray na bungad ni Lilac nang sagutin ni love ang call. Gaya kanina ay nakinig ulit ako. "This is her cousin, come here I wanna meet you" maawtoridad ng sabi ng katabi ko at inend ang call bago pa makasalita ang sa kabilang linya.
I scanned my phone while waiting for Alexa. Ngayon ko lang nabasa ang mga text niya, nagpapasundo pala ito pero dahil hindi ako nagrereply ay kay Clarrise ito nagpasundo.
Ilang saglit lang ay natigil ako sa upuan ko't napako ang atensyon sa tv. Ramdam kong lumapit si Kate sa sala para panuorin din ang babae na iniinterview sa showbiz news.
"Aster Fuentes" my cousin said and threw a pillow at me saka nang-aasar na tiningnan ako.
She's my ex girlfriend when I was just first year college pero tago kami sa public dahil may asawa ito na nasa ibang bansa. Never ko rin naman itong kinonsiderang ex kaya hindi ko na siya maalala.
I looked at her habang iniinterview siya dahil isa na siya sa highest paid fashion designer ngayon. She aged a bit pero maganda pa rin. Habang pinapanood ito ay narealize kong ito ang sumundo kay Kate noong weekend.
"What happened to the both of you pala" tanong ng pinsan ko and saw Kate glanced at us at ibinalik ang tuon sa tv.
"I ghost her" mahinang sabi ko para hindi marinig ng kapatid ko. I looked at Kate na mukhang nabitin sa interview ni Aster and rest her back sa couch. "Hindi ba siya 'yong sumundo sa 'yo no'ng Saturday?" pagka-usap ko rito.
"Yeah. We're working on a project" tipid nitong sagot. "Magkakilala kayo?" tanong nito at nang-aasar na tiningnan ako ni Lilac at tumawa sa asar kong mukha.
"Your ate was once her mistress" I bit my lip when she started laughing at tinapunan rin ito ng unan but I stopped when I see Alexa behind us.
"You're here na pala" gulat kong sabi at tumayo para hagkan ito.
"Kanina pa, engrossed kayo sa pinapanood niyo" may halong selos sa boses nito at tiningnan ako ng malungkot.
"She's just an ex" I told her at iginiya ito paupo. "Pinsan ko pala" pagpapakilala ko kay Lilac na mas lalo lumapad ang ngisi sa mukha.
"I'm Alexa" pagpapakilala ni Love.
"Nice to meet you Ms. Selosa" Lilac chuckled at parang nagsusumbong naman akong tiningnan ng mahal ko. "Biro lang. Kain na tayo" pag-aaya nito na akala mo ay siya ang nagluto.
Parang binagsakan naman ng langit at lupa ang mukha ni Kate kaya pinauna ko si Alexa at nagpaiwan ako sa sala para makausap ito saglit.
"You okay?" I asked at tinabihan siya.
Para siyang may itatanong pero ang hesitant niya.
"What is it?" kulit ko rito at bumuntong hininga ito.
"Why did you ghost her?" she looked at me, nangungusap ang mga mata niya at parang nalulungkot para kay Aster. Narinig pala nito ang sinabi ko kanina.
I sighed and showed my very sincere look. "I'm a Williams, hindi ako nababagay maging mistress at mahal ko pa ang ate Stella mo that time"
"Dapat sinabi mong iiwan mo na siya"
"I don't have the courage" she glared at me. Siguro naiisip na niyang ang walanghiya ko.
"Napakaheartless mo ate!" Galit pero mahina niyang sabi, iniiwasang marinig kami nila Alexa at Lilac na nasa dining table at nagkukwentuhan. Bahagya pang napatingin sa 'min si Alexa pero nginitian ko lang ito.
"Alright... bring her here sa birthday ko. I'll apologize and do whatever it takes for her forgiveness" napasubo kong promise kahit na nga ba hindi ko alam paano hihingiin ang kapatawaran ng Aster na 'yon.
Wala naman siguro siyang dapat na maging hinanakit sa 'kin, may reserba siya, ako wala. I made her happy in times of her failing marriage. Ako ang sumasalo ng problema niya, may it be her frustration sa work or husband.
"You better do that" kita ko ang tampo sa mukha nito kaya hinila ko na ito patayo and held her waist para maglapit ang katawan namin.
"You better not fall for her" I whispered while on our way to dining table.
I smiled at Alexa nang ipaghanda ako nito ng makakain.
"Hindi ka nagtraining?" Tanong niya pa kaya tumango ako. Usually at this time of day ako umuuwi galing training.
"It's Lilac's fault" I chuckled nang tumingin sa 'kin si Lilac.
"Sinisi pa ako. Pa'no tutulog-tulog 'yang girlfriend mo" umirap ito sa 'kin na ginaya ko rin. Mamaya ay mapagalitan ako ni Alexa dahil sa sinabi nito.
"Nagpaalam naman ako kay coach love. Inexcuse niya na ako dahil maganda naman ang performance ko sa practice. He also said pwede niya na ako ipasok sa first 5" explain ko kay Alexa para hindi kami magtalo mamaya kapag ihahatid ko na siya sa kanila.
"Siguraduhin mo ha" mataray nitong sabi at tiningnan pa ako to make sure if i'm telling the truth.
"'Yong ganyang mukha ay 'di dapat pinapaniwalaan, advice ko lang" sabat pa ng pinsan ko, sinipa ko nga sa ilalim ng table.
Pero natutuwa akong nandito na siya at nalaman kong hindi talaga siya galit sa 'kin. Walang nagbago sa pakikitungo niya, mas naging mapang-asar nga lang lalo.
Magana kaming kumain maliban kay Kate na parang ninanamnam ang niluto niya. Mataman ko siyang tiningnan matapos kong kumain, binabasa kung anong nasa isip niya. Wala naman sa 'kin problema kung babae rin ang gusto ng kapatid ko pero hindi ko gusto ang ideyang kay Aster siya mahuhulog at baka siya ang maging kabayaran ng kasalanan ko rito.
"What are you thinking?" pagbasag ni Alexa sa iniisip ko. Nandito ako ngayon sa balcony ng kwarto ko holding a glass of wine, trying to relax myself.
"Nothing, love"
"Nothing means there's something going on"
I sighed at sinabi na malapit ang kapatid ko at si Aster.
"Hindi natin mapipili kung kanino tayo mahuhulog, Blue" wind blew hard and I wish tinangay na lang niyon ang mga nasa isip ko.
Pumasok na kami ng kwarto at isinara ang glass door patungong balcony.
"Aren't you going home?" I asked Alexa na ngayo'y nakahiga na sa kama.
"You don't want me to sleep here?"
"Of course I want" tumabi ako sa kanya and wrapped ourselves with blanket. I watch her sleep in my arms before I started tracing her face, memorizing its every detail.
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Comment naman kayo para matapos ko na 'to hahaha