3rd person:
Chan was there to stay. The news got out that the boy group 3RACHA were to debut in Korea.
Felix and him were living the dream as chan was making big bills now. He spoiled Felix and made sure the younger no longer had to work and was safe at all times.
Even if they had to hid their relationship the two were content with the lives they had. Felix no longer had to interact with drunk, disrespectful jerks and Chan was doing what he lived whilst also 'doing' who he loved.
Life was amazing. Life wa-
"Chan! Heyyy~ Bang Chan the big boss leader! What's up my man?"
Well as amazing as life can be when Chan's life is constantly being run my money hungry agencies.
"I'm alright... so what do you need? I have an album to write and a fan meet to attend."
Chan had gotten sick of all these managers trying to control him and making him feel belittled.
"Well actually we need to show you something. This came through in dispatch this morning..."
Chan's heart stopped as he heard the name of the life ruining shit talkers. He watched as his managers presented him the iPad and there it was...
The article he had been dreading ever since 3RACHA made their debut...
'3RACHA's leader Bang Chan caught in a homosexual affair! X's and BrO's'
Chan looked at the article with so much hate and annoyance. The looked at the picture of him and Felix..
The pictures enraged chan as he looked down the page at what they wrote.
'Bang chan and his mysterious partner have been deceiving fans for years. Who knows who the real Bang Chan is and if he really does care about his dedicated fans?'
Chan wanted to through the iPad across the room, but instead he went straight to his Instagram page and he looked at all the comments on his recent IG post.
"What are we going to do Chan? You need to do something..."
Chan didn't respond as he started to delete all the negative comments. His first thought was 'what if Felix saw all of these?'.
He would hate to think that Felix was reading these and getting upset all by himself in their house.
"I don't know..."
"I have a few ideas..."
Chan lifted his head up from the iPad and looked at his management.
"What?"
After that the plan was shared and chan hated it, but could it be the only way Felix could stay safe?
~~~~~~
Felix:
Chan said he wanted bbq tonight, so I guess I'll make that, so what do I need?
I was at the grocery store just picking up things for dinner tonight. This life style still confuses me. I'm like a house husband, but not his husband..
I'm more like a secret, but I don't see it as a bad thing. As long as we're both safe, that's all that matters to me.
"No way is that him?"
"OMG it is.. what a slut"
"He isn't even that good looking"
I heard rude whispers as I roamed around the grocery store, but I chose to ignore them as I thought it was some bitchy High school girls picking on someone else.
"That's him from the article?"
"He could do so much better.."
"He's so ugly."
But I kept hearing them... like everywhere I went I heard insults.
"I can't believe Bang Chan would date that"
Shit... h-how do they know? I look around me and I notice the glares and the looks. I felt so vulnerable as I stopped in the middle of the grocery store just watching as everyone whispered and laughed at me.
I-I should go. I grab my stuff and pay for my groceries. I quickly run out of the store and back home. Even on my way home people talked and glared I felt ostracised. Like I was vermin...
Wh-what's happening?
I finally got home and turned on the news and-
There is was... the article..
'Big time rapper and producer Bang Chan caught having a secret affair with a unknown boy. Other resources have informed us the boy is called lee Felix and is an escort from the club 'blue lagoon night club'. Other sources have come forward and said the two have been dating for 2 years, but have know each other for 4.'
I stood in front of the TV in shock as I watched all my private information being leaked all over the news and Chan and I's relationship being torn down into pieces
I began to feel a hot stream of tears run down my face as I kept listening to the horrible things they were saying. It hurt the most because they were lying. Almost everything they said was a lie..
"Felix!" I heard the door open and I watched as chan ran into the house and straight over t me. "I'm so sorry Felix... I should've been more careful.."
He took me into his arms and I felt safe. I felt like nothing could hurt me here...
"I-it's okay.. w-we didn't know. It's no ones f-fault"
I buried my head further do to Chan's neck and I felt so warm and comfortable. Like none of these problems were happening and it was just a normal day again.
"I know.. but Felix, we have to do something about this. For your safety and mine.."
Chan pulled away from the hug as he looked me dead in the eyes. His expression was serious as he lead me to the couch and turned of the news.
"Like what? What can we do?"
Chan's hands held mine as his thumbs lightly stroked the back of them. It was calming and comforting, but I knew something wasn't right.
"Well it's more like what I need to do. Felix my management and I have decided I need to public date another idol. A female idol..."
My heart dropped... so chan would have to be public and affectionate with another? I guess I understand, but it still hurts.
"We all think this would be better for your safety and better for our situation."
I want to tell chan I hate the plan.. but I can't, this seems like the only way. It's just unfair... I just wish I was a girl so chan could be able to love me openly! But I'm not and I hate that... and I hate how this random lady gets to be so open with my lover!
But I have to pretend I'm fine, so chan is happy.
"Y-yeah that's sounds like a great idea.. so when are you making that announcement?"
It hurt me so much... it's funny because I've been dreaming of the day Chan would get in that stage at a conference meeting and tell the world I was his... but now. Now I'm just being pushed further into the background.
"Well... tomorrow actually. We thought it would be better if we did it sooner."
Tomorrow...
"And who's the girl? Is she nice? Pretty?"
This fake smile was killing me..
"You know Jamie, right? She's helping me."
Ah.. Jamie.. she's really pretty and nice and her and chan get on so well.
They're like perfect for each other.
"Yeah I know her. She'll do a great job! Um.. well I should make dinner."
I couldn't talk about his any longer. If I did I know I would end up crying.
And I don't want to cry anymore..
~~~~~~~~
Soon the morning came after a quiet night. Chan and I barely talked last night. I just blamed it on what happened in the grocery store and he seemed to understand.
But in reality I was quiet because I couldn't talk to Chan normally. What would I say to him? What can I say?
Right now I am was sat in front of the TV waiting for Chan's statement conference to begin. Soon the credit rolled and there he was...
On that stage.. hand in hand with a women that isn't me. look at their smiles, they sure would be good together...
Wouldn't they...
I watched as they finally sat down and the interviewers started hurling questions at chan about me and our relationship.
'So Mr Bang how do you feel about breaking thousands of your fans hearts because of your selfish homosexual desires?'
'Oh Mr Bang! What are your intentions with that man? Are you dating? Are you friends?'
I watched as chan picked out the questions he wanted to answer. He began with the easiest.
'Who is Lee felix?'
My heart pounded in anticipation but I don't know why because I know he won't admit who I really am to him.
"Lee Felix is a roommate and old friend of mine. Okay next question."
It was if the words were too easy for him.. he didn't stutter nor stumble on his words.
Roommate? I guess we're just roommates again.
'But Mr Bang we have sources on the outside saying you and Mr Lee have been in relations for many years'
'Mr Lee and I are very close. We have a bromance. Now can we move on?'
Does he know how much this is hurting me? Does he think of what he's saying?! I'm right here! Just wish we could be honest...
'Okay Mr Bang may I ask why Miss Park is with you today?'
Here it goes... I was about to be officially pushed away and into the background. Like a dirty little secret...
'Miss park and I would like to make an announcement... first and foremost I would like to say I am not gay nor have I ever had any homosexual desires and the reason being is because of my girlfriend... Miss Jamie Park.'
That was it... I was now a background character... I know chan was lying, but his words still hurt..
He has never had a homosexual desire... then what am I?! I don't want to pushed din the background and I don't want to be treated like a secret anymore then I already have to.
'Well congratulations Mr Bang. I'm sure your fans will be pleased to hear you aren't gay.'
After a few more questions asked the conference was over and I watched as chan and Jamie walked hand in hand off the stage.
Is this my life now?
I'm just a dirty little secret...